


Ask & You Shall Recieve

by TheRealKags



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Accidents, Adoption, Alternate Universe - Different First Meeting, Alternate Universe - Idols, Alternate Universe - Theatre, Angst, Broken Bones, Bullying, Burns, Car Accidents, Childhood Friends, Chronic Illness, Cinderella Elements, Dissociation, Drinking, Dyslexia, Eating Disorders, Established Relationship, Family Drama, Fire, Fist Fights, Foster Care, Gen, Gender Dysphoria, Getting Together, Injury Recovery, Kidnapping, Major Character Injury, Missing Persons, Musical References, Neglect, Orphanage, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Past Child Abuse, Prompt Fic, Scars, Suicide Attempt, Surgery, Trans Hinata Shouyou, Underage Drinking, Violence, tragic past
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-17
Updated: 2018-11-14
Packaged: 2019-05-24 13:48:00
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 25
Words: 42,963
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14955813
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheRealKags/pseuds/TheRealKags
Summary: You left your requests in the comments, and I fulfilled them.***REQUESTS CLOSED INDEFINITELY***





	1. Rolling Thunder

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> SunnyMiracle: “Karasuno team gets into a car crash or something like that :3”

“It’s really coming down out there,” Ukai said, looking out the bus window as Takeda drove them down the winding road.

 

“If I had known it would be this bad, I wouldn’t have said yes to the practice match,” Takeda replied. “But we’re close to the school, we should be fine.”

 

Hinata looked out the dark bus window. Kageyama slept in the seat next to him, snoring away, just like their captain and other team members scattered throughout the bus. He yawned, looking at the dark trees they were passing by.

 

Then, there was a jolt. A hard jolt that sent the bus teetering and wobbling and the world spun. Everything was chaotically tumbling around and Hinata couldn’t tell which way was up.

 

Darkness engulfed the bus.

 

-

 

When Daichi opened his eyes, he didn’t know what had happened. He was pulled from sleep roughly for a couple of seconds- and in those seconds was complete chaos- before he was pushed back into unconsciousness. That’s all he remembered and now, he lay on the ground with rain hitting his face, staring at the dark, cloudy night sky.

 

Then, he heard a scream.

 

That was what pulled Daichi out of his grogginess. He sat up quickly and tried to stand, ignoring the pain that shot through his body and the dizziness that plagued his head. Who was screaming and why wouldn’t they stop? Daichi felt around for his phone and realized it wasn’t there. He must’ve lost it when they crashed.

 

He walked briskly through the woods, searching for someone- anyone. When he found who was screaming, he almost screamed, himself.

 

Yamaguchi was laying on the ground, a bone sticking out of his calf. The look of terror and anguish on his face made Daichi step forward and kneel next to him.

 

“Yamaguchi,” he said, barely hearing his voice over the screaming. “Hey, calm down! Tadashi!”

 

His screaming quieted into sobs and he looked at Daichi, jaw clenched and eyes wide.

 

“Take a deep breath,” Daichi said, trying to sound soothing instead of terrified. “You have to breathe. Have you seen anyone else?”

 

Yamaguchi lifted a shaking hand and pointed behind Daichi. The captain turned around and saw Nishinoya, slumped against a tree, eyes closed. Daichi stood and strode over to him, lifting his chin.

 

“Yuu,” he called. “Noya, wake up.”

 

The libero’s eyes fluttered open, but he didn’t seem like he was awake at all. His eyes were cloudy and his face was slack, blood dripping from a wound on his forehead.

 

“D-D-uuhhnn,” Nishinoya slurred.

 

“It’s okay,” Daichi said. “Just don’t go to sleep, okay?”

 

Noya gave a small nod and Daichi went back to Yamaguchi.

 

“Do you have a phone,” he asked. “I can’t find mine. I want to call for help.”

 

Yamaguchi shook his head. Daichi sighed and stood.

 

“I’m going to find the others,” he said. “Make sure Noya doesn’t fall asleep.”

 

“N-No,” Yamaguchi moaned. “D-Don’t le-leave.”

 

“I promise I’ll be back soon,” Daichi assured. “Okay?”

 

The pained look on Yamaguchi’s face didn’t leave as he nodded and Daichi turned to leave. Walking away from them was hard, but he needed to find the others.

 

“Suga!” Daichi called. “Suga!”

 

-

 

Suga opened his eyes and blearily looked around. The last thing he remembered was Daichi snoring next to him.

 

There was a groan from a few feet away. Suga looked up and saw Tanaka getting up off the ground.

 

“What the hell happened?” Tanaka asked.

 

“I think we crashed,” Suga answered. “Are you okay?”

 

“I think so,” he said. “Are you?”

 

“Yeah, I-“

 

Suga was cut off when he tried to stand by a sharp pain searing through his shoulder. He hadn’t been aware of it at first, but now he realized that he couldn’t move his left arm.

 

Tanaka ran forward and gently pulled his t-shirt sleeve up, revealing a purple and misshapen joint.

 

“It’s dislocated,” Tanaka observed. “I know how to put it in, but it’ll hurt.”

 

Suga was silent for a second, the only sound around them being the rain falling to the ground. He took a deep breath.

 

“Do it.”

 

Tanaka grabbed his arm and got the leverage to push it back into place. All Suga was aware of next was the searing pain radiating into his arm and shoulder, causing him to scream. When it was over, Tanaka leaned back onto his heels.

 

“Sorry,” Tanaka said. “I told you it would hurt.”

 

“It’s fine,” Suga gasped, still catching his breath. “We need to find the others.”

 

They started walking, Suga still cradling his arm. It was another few minutes before they saw someone up ahead walking towards them.

 

“Is that...” Tanaka said. “Hey! Chikara!”

 

Ennoshita and Narita walked towards them, and Suga gasped when he saw that in their arms was none other than Kinoshita, obviously unable to walk and only being supported by his friends.

 

“He broke his leg, I think,” Ennoshita said. “Where’s the bus?”

 

“I think it’s up that hill,” Tanaka said. “We should head there.”

 

Hopefully they’d find more of their teammates- alive.

 

-

 

“Coach! Coach, wake up!”

 

Ukai opened his eyes and saw blue eyes staring down at him.

 

“Something’s wrong with Hinata,” Kageyama said.

 

The man pushed himself up into a sitting position and his head spun for a second before he got his bearings. He looked to where Kageyama stood, cradling his arm and looking at him with wide eyes. Ukai stood, wincing when he put pressure on his left foot but pushing through it to follow Kageyama.

 

There was a small clearing where Asahi sat next to Hinata’s unmoving form, lying on his side. Ukai rushed over and kneeled down next to the redhead. His eyes were wide and his breathing was ragged, hands shaking as they gripped onto the ground.

 

“I c-can’t move my le-legs,” Hinata gasped. “It h-hurts.”

 

“Don’t move him,” Ukai said. “We can’t move him if he’s hurt his spine. We need to get help.” He stood. “I’m going to look for the bus. There might be a way to contact someone. Asahi, you come with me in case anyone is trapped. Kageyama, you stay with Hinata and keep him awake.”

 

Kageyama nodded and Ukai turned, hearing Asahi’s footsteps follow him. They set off in a random direction, the cold of the night beginning to set in through the rain. They trudged through until the coach felt Asahi’s hand on his shoulder.

 

“Look,” he said, pointing to their left.

 

Ukai did so and saw a figure standing, staring at him.

 

“Coach?” The figure spoke in an almost calm voice.

 

Ukai nodded and the figure walked forward, revealing itself to be Tsukishima, but with dark blood all over his face.

 

“Oh, God,” Asahi gasped, putting a hand over his mouth while he gagged.

 

Tsukishima’s eye was bloody and swollen, and though Ukai couldn’t see very well he was sure there was glass in it- probably from the glasses that were no longer on his face.

 

Ukai stepped toward him, a hand outstretched. “Do you feel okay? Can you make it back to the bus?”

 

“I think,” Tsukki replied.

 

Tsukishima walked with them, silent while they walked towards the bus. Ukai couldn’t stop looking at him because he feared he would spontaneously collapse.

 

“I’m glad Yachi and Shimizu weren’t with us,” Asahi said. “Even if it meant they had to be sick.”

 

Ukai hummed in agreement, just as the bus came into view.

 

-

 

“Suga!”

 

Daichi yelled his throat hoarse. What if he was walking in the wrong direction? What if he was going further away from everyone? What if-

 

“Sawamura?”

 

He stopped. It was a faint voice, breathless and gasping. It wasn’t Suga’s voice, but at least it was someone. Daichi squinted through the pouring rain and saw a large structure. When he walked forward, the bus came into view, as did their teacher strapped in the front seat.

 

“Takeda!” Daichi ran forward and saw him gasping for air. “Are you alright? What’s wrong?”

 

“I’ll be fine,” the teacher said. “I’m just trapped. Can you get my phone out of my bag? I think it fell to the back of the bus.”

 

Daichi went and retrieved the bag and gasped with relief when he saw that the phone was glowing.

 

“Takeda,” Daichi said. “It works, we can call for he-“

 

The adrenaline must’ve been wearing off because suddenly, Daichi was in pain. It seared through his stomach and chest and he found himself coughing until he was spitting up blood.

 

“Sawamura,” Takeda gasped, fiddling with his seatbelt and trying to get it off. “What’s wrong?”

 

He was on the ground now, writhing in agony and his vision was blackening into nothingness. He just barely heard Takeda continue to yell for him before he lost consciousness.

 

-

 

“How do you feel, Tanaka,” Suga asked. “I find it hard to believe that you got out of that without a scratch.”

 

“Ha!” Tanaka laughed. “I guess I’m pretty unbelievable then!”

 

Suga kept staring at him, seeing the pain in his eyes. Something wasn’t right, he could feel it.

 

“Wait,” Ennoshita said. “Do you guys hear that?”

 

Suga listened close.

 

“Sawamura,” he heard. “Wake up! Hand me the phone!”

 

He gasped and ran ahead of his teammates towards the shadowy figure of the bus- which was somehow right-side-up. Suga stopped when he reached his teacher.

 

“Suga,” Takeda gasped. “Daichi is back there, he has a phone, but I think he passed out. You need to call for help.”

 

Suga sprang towards where Daichi lay at the back of the bus. There was blood dribbling from his chin and a phone clutched tightly in his hand.

 

He called. Suga called for help and during that call, not only did Tanaka and the others reach the bus, but Ukai, Asahi, and Tsukishima came as well- and, Daichi regained consciousness.

 

“I need to go back to Noya and Yamaguchi,” he said. “They need- They need help.”

 

Then Suga heard the helicopter. He looked out the bus window and saw a light shining on them.

 

“They’ll find them,” Suga assured. “They will.”

 

Sure enough, they did. Each Karasuno team member was brought to the hospital and some of them were rushed into surgery. Each of them was treated and their parents were called and news reporters were in the waiting room- but none of them were up to talk about it.

 

“Will he be able to jump again?” Suga heard Kageyama asking a doctor in the hallway. “You have to tell me something!”

 

“Kageyama,” Suga said, emerging from his room. “Calm down. Just wait until his parents get here.”

 

The first year looked back at the doctor with anger in his eyes before turning and heading back to his room.

 

Their parents all came sooner or later. Suga, Ennoshita, Kageyama, Ukai, Asahi, Narita, and Kinoshita were all discharged, but insisted on waiting until their friends were out of surgery. Daichi, Hinata, Yamaguchi, and Takeda were all still in surgery. Tanaka didn’t go in until later because he insisted he was fine until he vomited blood all over the floor. Tsukishima refused to have surgery for his eye for a while, but soon realized that he’d need it if he ever wanted to get his vision back.

 

The first person to get out of surgery was Yamaguchi. His parents were there and were the only ones allowed to see him at first, but that was understandable.

 

Noya didn’t need surgery, but he needed constant monitoring because of his head injury. The doctors said he would be fine, but he’d need to stay in the hospital for at least another day.

 

The next person to get out of surgery was Takeda. Ukai was the first one in the room and he was glad to hear that they’d fixed his lungs so he could go home in a few days, no complications expected.

 

Then came Daichi. His lungs were in bad shape because of the impact and there was still a tube in his chest draining the blood, so he had to stay in the ICU. The doctors said it was incredible that he was able to function enough to find his way back to the bus in the state he was in, but it was probably the adrenaline.

 

Tanaka got out next. He had some lacerations in his bowel, but the surgeon said it was an easy fix and he should be able to eat normally again within the next week. Suga wanted to yell at him for not being honest about the pain he was in, but he couldn’t bring himself to do it.

 

Next came Tsukishima. The doctor said he might never get back the vision in his eye, but they’d have to wait and see. Suga felt awful for him. He might have that reminder of the accident for the rest of his life.

 

The last person out was Hinata. He’d damaged his spine and his pelvis and the surgery was apparently very complex- which made sense, since it was the longest surgery out of all of them. Hinata was also in intensive care because he sustained damage to his chest as well. They said he might have trouble walking again.

 

Suga felt this crushing guilt weighing on his shoulders. His friends had to have major surgery- some of them had life changing injuries- and he escaped with a mere injured shoulder. If he could take their pain away, he would.

 

Thunder crashed outside and Suga saw lightning through the window of the waiting room. It had been raining for an unreasonably long time and now that his friends were out of surgery, Suga’s parents wanted to take him home- but he didn’t want to be on the road when the weather was still like this. Besides, he was still reluctant to leave his team.

 

Team. That’s what they were. They did everything as a team. They had study sessions, sleepovers, and even ate lunch together. They were a team on and off the court. That’s how they would get through this.

 

As a team.


	2. Between a Rock and a Hard Place

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> cecesgo: “missing Hinata... cause i live4angst. Idk he went for a jog and slipped off the road down the mountain and he’s like the guy w his arm/leg pinned under a rock or a tree or sum shit ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i hope this is okay lol

Hour 1

 

Some might say that it was too early, but to Hinata it was the perfect time for a run. There were some days where he was just this energized in the morning and he decided to get a little bit of running in before... More running at practice. It was kind of redundant, but Hinata just loved testing his body and pushing himself to the limit.

 

He was running through the foggy air when something crossed his path. It was furry and had a tail and Hinata stopped moving for a second. He gasped.

 

“A cat!” He slowly walked up to it, holding his hand out and trying not to scare it away. “Come here, kitty! You’re so cute, I could- wait!”

 

The cat ran down the road and Hinata tried to run after it but the road was still slick with the rain that came the night before and Hinata’s foot slipped out from under him.

 

The momentum sent him twisting and turning until he was in a complete free fall for a couple of feet. Hinata’s body slammed hard onto a large protruding rock, but it gave way under his weight and he was falling once more. This time he landed on ground that was a tad bit softer than before, but rolled down the steep slope along with the boulder.

 

At some point he stopped rolling. Hinata wasn’t sure if he blacked out or not because when he opened his eyes, everything was calm. Upon landing, his first thought was, “who made the decision to put a road there with no guardrail?” His second thought was, “why can’t I move?” Hinata looked to his right, to his left, and everything looked fine. It was when he looked down that he realized what was wrong.

 

The rock that was falling earlier? Yeah, it landed on his leg.

 

Hinata let out a scream because even though the pain wasn’t setting in yet through the adrenaline, it was horrifying to see his right leg being crushed under the rock.

 

“Help,” he screamed. “Help!”

 

No one came.

 

Hour 2

 

“Where’s Hinata?”

 

Kageyama was stopped by Daichi as soon as he walked into the gym.

 

“How am I supposed to know,” he said. “He probably overslept.”

 

“That’s not like him,” Suga said. “I hope he’s not sick or anything.”

 

Kageyama nodded in acknowledgment before getting ready to practice.

 

Hour 3

 

Kageyama walked into first period- Japanese History- and wasn’t pleased when he found that Hinata wasn’t there. He was probably sick.

 

Kageyama grabbed his phone and shot a text to Hinata, “where the hell are you?” He put his phone down and waited for a reply.

 

-

 

Ding!

 

Hinata’s eyes shot open. He’d given up on screaming and had been trying to calm himself down the best he could, but his breathing was ragged and his leg was still searing in pain that sent shudders through his body.

 

Now, he was looking all around, feeling in his pockets for his phone. It wasn’t in a pocket, but conveniently several feet away from Hinata’s hand. He huffed out a sigh and stretched as far as he could to grab it, but it was no use. There was no way he’d be able to reach it and any more movement than breathing just increased the pain- which was getting unbearable now, might he add.

 

It continued to go off with the occasional text message and eventually a few phone calls, and all Hinata could do was lay there and cry until the messages stopped.

 

Hour 6

 

Kageyama was put off by the fact that the dumbass wouldn’t even open his messages. He’d sent several angry ones, and the occasional worried one, but left off at, “if you don’t want to talk to me, fine! See if I care!”

 

Now, as Kageyama walked into the lunch room, he came to regret the last message he sent when Yamaguchi came rushing up to him.

 

“You haven’t heard from Hinata, have you?” The freckled boy asked urgently.

 

Kageyama raised an eyebrow. “No, why?”

 

Yamaguchi gulped. “He’s missing. He left his house for practice early this morning but he didn’t make it and no one can find him.”

 

Kageyama felt his blood run cold. Did Hinata get kidnapped? Was he murdered? Or did he get hit by a bus and end up in a coma in some hospital bed, mangled beyond recognition?

 

“We have to go look for him,” Kageyama said.

 

“We already tried that,” Yamaguchi said. “Nishinoya almost got himself suspended again. We aren’t allowed to leave the school without a parent’s permission.”

 

Kageyama exhaled. “Damn it!”

 

“Calm down,” Yamaguchi said. “The police are looking for him. They’ll find him.”

 

Knowing that dumbass and his luck, Kageyama wasn’t so sure.

 

Hour 8

 

Hinata groaned. He was too tired to be frantically crying anymore and the pain had long since faded into numbness. Someone had to be looking for him by now, right? School was almost over, they’d probably called his mom hours ago wondering why he hadn’t shown up at school. Maybe he should try yelling again.

 

“Help,” Hinata tried, but his dry throat caused his voice to fade. “Help me!”

 

He was hungry. He was thirsty. It had been raining for a while, so he was drenched and shivering. What if he died out here? What if no one found him?

 

Oh, no, what if they had to cut off his leg?! He could never jump or play volleyball again!

 

“Help!” Hinata cried, fresh tears rolling down his face. “Help me!”

 

Hour 9

 

As soon as the bell rang, Kageyama was out. He was running towards the school gates in the cool wet air when he heard someone call after him. Looking behind him, he saw that it was Sugawara.

 

“Are you going to look for him?”

 

Kageyama nodded. “I know what route he takes to get here. I’m just going to retrace his steps.”

 

“We’re coming with you!” Tanaka was yelling as he and the rest of the team ran up behind Suga.

 

So they went on their way, walking through town while yelling Hinata’s name and asking everyone they passed if they’d seen their small friend. No one had.

 

When they got to the mountain road, Kageyama began to worry.

 

“How about we look around off the sides,” Kageyama suggested. “Be careful, though.”

 

Kageyama, Tsukishima, Yamaguchi, and Daichi took off along the side of the road. They split up and began shouting Hinata’s name and after a lot of walking, Kageyama heard a small voice.

 

“Help,” it said weakly. “Help!”

 

“Hinata?!” Kageyama shouted. He looked around frantically and the rain started up again. “Hinata!”

 

Then, he saw it. A shock of orange hair on the ground.

 

“Guys!” Kageyama yelled. “I found him!”

 

Kageyama said his name again and ran over to him, but his smile faded when he realized something.

 

“Shit.”

 

“Help me,” Hinata cried, looking up at him with glassy eyes.

 

There was a rock on him. Literally, on his leg.

 

“Oh, God, uh,” Kageyama stuttered. “Let-Let me try and get this off of you, okay?”

 

He situated his hands on the boulder and started pushing it, but it didn’t budge. He kept trying until he heard a shout from behind him.

 

“What the hell are you doing?” Kageyama looked behind him and saw Tsukishima running to him, the others in tow. “Don’t move that! It could cut his leg off!”

 

There were shouts of “Oh, shit!” Coming from the second years.

 

“He’s right,” Suga said. “We need to call an ambulance.”

 

“How are they getting an ambulance down here,” Nishinoya said.

 

“They’ll figure something out,” Daichi said.

 

“Guys,” Suga called from where he kneeled next to Hinata’s head. “Give me your jackets.”

 

“What?” Tanaka almost sounded appalled.

 

“Hinata’s freezing,” Suga elaborated. “Look at him! Give me your jackets and call for an ambulance!”

 

They did what he said and Tanaka ended up waiting by the road for the ambulance. Suga was right, Hinata looked like he was freezing to death. He was pale and shaking and when they piled all of their jackets on him he closed his eyes.

 

“Someone should be here soon,” Daichi said.

 

They waited and within several minutes, paramedics were making their way down there and Hinata was practically sobbing in relief.

 

The next hour or so was a blur, Kageyama only aware of Hinata screaming when the pressure of the rock on his leg was released and damn, his leg looked bad. It was crushed and bloody and Kageyama saw Asahi throw up a little.

 

The last they saw of Hinata was him being loaded into the ambulance.

 

Hour 15

 

The Karasuno volleyball team had been waiting to see Hinata for hours. They’d been told to go home, because Hinata’s family had been contacted and he was in good hands, but they wouldn’t. They wanted to be there when he woke up.

 

He did wake up, after being in surgery for his leg for several hours. They weren’t allowed in right away, because obviously his family wanted to see him first, but eventually they all lined up outside his room.

 

“Kageyama,” Daichi said. “You’re probably his closest friend, do you want to go in first?”

 

He nodded, walking forward and into the room. He was greeted with a very groggy and uncomfortable looking Hinata laying on the bed, his leg in some contraption that kept it secure.

 

“Hey,” Kageyama said.

 

“Hi,” Hinata replied quietly.

 

“How’s... How’s your leg?”

 

“Not good,” he said, his voice beginning to get thick with tears. “I’ll be out the rest of the season.”

 

Of course. It always came back to volleyball. Not to the fact that he’d be completely immobilized for who knows how long and that he almost died.

 

“You’ll still show up to practice, right?”

 

Hinata sighed. “Yeah.”

 

Kageyama sat next to his bed. “I was really worried about you.”

 

The frown on Hinata’s face disappeared and was replaced with a small smile. “Thanks for finding me. I probably would’ve died soon if you hadn’t.”

 

Kageyama scoffed. “Don’t be dramatic.”

 

“It’s true!”

 

They continued to talk until Hinata’s mom came back in and requested that Kageyama and the rest of the team allow Hinata some peace and quiet so he could sleep.

 

“I’m glad you found him,” Suga said, clapping a hand on Kageyama’s shoulder on their way out.

 

“I guess you could say,” Nishinoya started. “Hinata was stuck between a rock and a hard place!”

 

Noya and Tanaka broke out into wild laughter and Kageyama couldn’t help but snicker.

 

They were idiots.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> requests are currently closed because i went into this with like 5 requests already so sorry but please be patient i already have a lot written but i want to space out my updates in case i have writers block or my life gets crazy lol  
> i’ve been kind of MIA in both of my works lately because i started work and even though i only work part time i have a lot of health issues so i have doctors appointments basically every day that i’m not working so i’m pretty busy but i’m making things work ;)


	3. Home?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> anonymous: “Hinata was kidnapped from a very young age and kept hostage for most of his childhood”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> idk this didn’t give me too many details so i’m kind of nervous it wasn’t what this person was going for but it’s as good as i could do ahaha

He was Hinata Shouyou- the boy who went missing in a supermarket when he was two and wasn’t found until he was thirteen. He hadn’t known he was being held hostage until the police showed up at his “family” home and took him away.

 

Hinata was told that the reason they took him was because the couple couldn’t have kids of their own. Finding out that your mom isn’t really your mom and your dad isn’t really your dad is one thing- but finding out that they’re being arrested and that you have to go and live with a strange new family is something different.

 

In reality, he should’ve known that something was wrong. He spent his early childhood locked in the house, unable to go outside and play with any of the other kids that lived in the neighborhood. When he turned seven, he was allowed to go to school. It was a hard adjustment for him, but his “parents” were supportive and helped him through.

 

His “parents” fought, though- a lot. The fights were usually about him. He once heard his dad say that it was time to get rid of him, but his mom shut that down fast.

 

When Hinata was found, his dad went crazy. He took Hinata and held a gun to his head saying that he knew he should’ve gotten rid of him a while ago. At the same time, his mom was yelling that if they couldn’t have him, no one could. Hinata went numb in that moment. He didn’t panic, even while his heartbeat pounded in his ears.

 

The police diffused the situation and Hinata was safe, but the whole ordeal was something traumatic for him. To be betrayed by someone who you thought would love you forever- it was life changing.

 

When he was reunited with his rightful parents at the police station, they treated him like a frightened animal at first.

 

“You probably won’t remember us,” the woman- his mom- said. “But... we’re your parents.”

 

“You have a baby sister,” his dad said. “Her name is Natsu. She’s two. She’s right outside, do you want to meet her?”

 

Hinata nodded curtly. He couldn’t bring himself to speak. He’d always wanted siblings, but his parents- well, the other people- always said they couldn’t.

 

The door opened and a toddler waddled into the room, a wild look on her face.

 

“Look, Natsu,” his mom said. “This is your brother, Shouyou.”

 

Natsu went up to where he sat and he reached down to pick her up, placing her on his lap. He looked into her honey brown eyes, the same shade as his, and she spoke.

 

“Bru-dder,” she said.

 

Hinata felt tears come to his eyes. “Brother,” he whispered.

 

Fast forward three years and Hinata has grown accustomed to his new life.

 

“The past is behind us,” his mother kept saying. “The future is ahead.”

 

She was right. That is, until people asked who he was.

 

Whenever he introduced himself, he got the same reaction.

 

“Wait, Hinata Shouyou? The kid they found after eleven years?”

 

“Whoa!”

 

“Everyone thought you were dead!”

 

He had to learn how to tune out the awe and amazement- especially when he went into high school, which was stressful enough as it was. To have his reputation as a miracle child following him around only added to that stress.

 

So when Hinata met a boy who didn’t act like his name was taboo, he was excited. That boy’s name was Kageyama Tobio- a boy who referred to him as a dumbass, not as someone to walk on eggshells around in case he has some sort of PTSD. He was the only person who treated Hinata like a normal person.

 

There was one moment when it all came crashing down. Hinata knew it would happen sooner or later. He knew that the rumors would reach Kageyama eventually- antisocial as he is. It was inevitable, but that didn’t mean Hinata had to like it.

 

Some students were staring at him, whispering to each other quiet enough to be unheard, before one of them walked up to where Hinata sat, eating lunch with Kageyama.

 

“You’re Hinata, right?” The boy said.

 

Hinata nodded, trying to hide the wince on his face. He knew what was going to come next.

 

“I don’t want to be rude, but... You’re, like, that kid that was kidnapped, or whatever, right? And they found you after like a decade?”

 

Kageyama scoffed. “Yeah, right. That almost never happens. Where’d you hear a story like that?”

 

The boy raised his eyebrows. “You’ve never heard of him? Hinata Shouyou- the kid that parents always talk about to each other, the kid that was on the news when he was found- you’ve never seen his picture before?”

 

“No,” Kageyama said skeptically. He looked over to the redhead. “What’s he talking about?”

 

Hinata sighed. “Yes, that’s me. Happy?”

 

The other kid winced, looking like he was about to apologize, but walking away instead. Hinata stared at his food and Kageyama raised his eyebrows.

 

“What is he talking about,” he repeated.

 

“I-I was taken when I was really young, raised by those people, and then the police found me and brought me back to my birth family,” Hinata mumbled. “Just... Don’t make a big deal out of it, okay? Everyone always does. They didn’t abuse me or anything, I didn’t even know they weren’t my real parents.”

 

Kageyama was silent then and Hinata looked over to see him with an unreadable expression on his face.

 

“Okay,” the setter said. “Thanks for telling me.”

 

Hinata was shocked. “That’s... That’s it? You’re not going to ask me, like, a billion questions?”

 

“No,” the blue eyed boy replied. “I’m sure you get enough questions- and besides, I don’t want to hear you talk more than absolutely necessary. If you want to say something about it, go ahead. I won’t force you.”

 

“Uh,” Hinata stuttered. “That’s... Nice, I guess? Thanks.”

 

“You’re welcome.”

 

This was the beginning of a wonderful, awkward friendship.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> requests are still closed :(( im overwhelmed sorry


	4. A Glass Half Empty

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> anonymous: “Hinatas Family has a favorite child and it’s not him”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello all

At first, Hinata thought it was because Natsu was just a baby. Everyone loves babies, it’s natural to pay less attention to your firstborn when another kid comes around.

 

Hinata loved her, too. He wanted to spend every second of every day with her. The problem was, he’d always get shooed away by his mom and dad.

 

It started out as, “you talk too much.” Hinata could understand that. He did talk a lot- he was just a hyper kid and he needed to learn how to keep a handle on his energy. That’s what his parents said. That’s why they let him start volleyball. They hoped it would tire him out so he wouldn’t be as energetic at home.

 

Then, it went to, “do you have any friends you want to go stay with tonight? We need some family time with Natsu.”

 

It stung just a little, but his mother said it so nicely- that they needed some bonding time with the baby, just like they did with him when he was young- that he just called his friends and asked if he could come over. They usually said yes, and their parents would always talk about how good of a kid he was and how he was a delight to have over. It seemed to reinforce his parents’ need for “family time” without him.

 

Natsu got older and she was doted on more and more by extended family members and family friends. Her birthday parties were filled with endless gifts and cake and balloons. Hinata’s usually consisted of a couple new shirts and five dollars, but that was just because he was older. Birthday parties were for kids.

 

Slowly, it got to the point where his parents were downright cold. They didn’t show him any affection whatsoever. They stopped waiting for him to get home before serving dinner. They went out to the movies without buying him a ticket. His clothes and shoes got so old he had to beg for new ones because they didn’t even look at him enough to notice.

 

By the time Hinata started high school, it felt like he was living in someone else’s home.

 

He still loved Natsu. When his parents had him babysit, he felt like he was in heaven. This little girl was smart and charismatic and Hinata almost couldn’t believe they had the same genes. He was awkward and annoying and she was everything but that. She was perfect.

 

He was much less.

 

So when he went into high school, it was no shock that everyone on his team was much better at volleyball than he was. Everyone in his classes were smarter than he was. Everyone was better looking. Everyone was nicer. Less annoying.

 

Kageyama was what really put him on edge. The setter was always yelling at him, calling him a dumbass as if he didn’t hear it enough already.

 

His parents shouting at him to get better grades. Kageyama yelling at him to do better in practice. The voice inside his head saying that he was ugly, inside and out.

 

It was too much.

 

“Stop!”

 

Kageyama‘s voice stopped short before he could get the word “dumbass” off his tongue. His scowl wavered and he didn’t say anything.

 

“Just stop,” Hinata said weakly, voice shaking. “I-I can’t... I... Need to go.”

 

He turned on his heels and ran from the gym, not even stopping to change his shoes. It was warm out- he could feel the sun beating down on the back of his neck as he ran aimlessly. He didn’t want to run home. It wasn’t a home. It was a house. Nowhere was home to him.

 

“Hinata!” He could hear voices calling after him and hear one pair of footsteps running. “Wait! Slow down!”

 

Eventually the burning in Hinata’s lungs caused him to come to a slow stop, bracing his hands on his knees. The footsteps came closer and stopped behind him.

 

“Hinata, what was that about?” It was Suga. Hinata turned around.

 

“I do everything wrong,” he cried. “I screw everything up and I don’t know how to fix it. Nothing I do is ever good enough and it never will be!”

 

“Hinata you’re a good volleyball player,” Suga said. “You can get even better if you practice. I’ll talk to Kageyama and-“

 

“No!” Hinata wiped the snot from his nose. “It’s not just that, it’s not just him! It’s everything, I’m so bad at everything. I’m a horrible athlete, a bad student, and an even worse son.”

 

“Says who?” Suga said, worry drawing his eyebrows together.

 

Hinata scoffed. “Everyone. My parents hate me and I’m bad at volleyball and one day you guys will get tired of me too and I don’t think I’ll be able to take it if you leave-“

 

“No one’s leaving,” Suga said, stepping forward and grabbing Hinata’s shoulders. “You’re a good person. You’re good at volleyball. Your grades are fine. Believe it or not, some people actually like you.” He pulled Hinata to his chest. “You’re not unlovable.”

 

Hinata was crying at this point. “I don’t know what I’m doing wrong.”

 

“It’s okay,” Suga said.

 

“I want to be better.”

 

Suga hushed him. “You’re fine the way you are right now.”

 

Hinata heard footsteps approaching them and pulled away from Suga to see Kageyama standing behind them.

 

“I told you to wait at the gym,” Suga said.

 

“I know,” Kageyama replied. “I-I just... Are you okay, Hinata?”

 

The redhead sniffed. “Yeah. I’m sorry.”

 

A look of panic flashed across Kageyama’s face. “What? No, don’t be- why?”

 

“I-I, uh,” Hinata spluttered. “I didn’t mean to make you angry.”

 

“I overreacted,” Kageyama said. “You’re good at volleyball. I shouldn’t have told you you weren’t.”

 

Hinata looked at the ground. “It’s fine.”

 

They all stood silently for a second. Then, Hinata looked up.

 

“Let’s go back to practice,” he suggested.

 

They did, leaving the topic of Hinata’s terrible self esteem and his parents indifference unresolved- because what could they do? They couldn’t swoop in and steal Hinata away from home, which was probably considered kidnapping. All they could do was be there for him, and reprimand Kageyama whenever he got to be too harsh.

 

There was no good side to this. No happy ending in the near future.

 

This was a glass half empty.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> requests are still closed just give me a little bit  
> if you comment a request while requests are closed i won’t be taking it so please wait until requests are open again! :D


	5. Love is a Burning Thing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fangirl: “I also like hurting Hinata so one idea that’s been on my mind since forever is a Hinata/Kageyama Hinata getting into a sort of accident where he gets major burns and burn scars and just scars, and Hinata is really self-conscious about them and Kageyama just helps him”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> idk this prompt made me think of Ring of Fire by Johnny Cash

Hinata’s parents were on a late date night. Natsu was at a sleepover. It wasn’t often that Hinata got the house truly all to himself, so he enjoyed the quiet for a good five minutes before he started doing the chores he’d been left while blasting music through the house on his bluetooth speaker.

 

He danced while vacuuming and sang while washing the dishes. It was a good time, especially when he watched whatever movies he wanted while folding laundry. If there was a way to make chores fun, Hinata knew how.

 

Eventually it got dark outside and exhaustion from practice that day set in. He groggily switched the laundry into the dryer, pulling out what had to air dry and turning the machine on. Hinata slipped into bed in the room next to the laundry room and closed his eyes, falling asleep quickly.

 

Next thing Hinata knew, he woke up to the smell of smoke. It caused his nose to itch and sent him into a panic. He ran to his door and yanked it open, coughing at the smoke that greeted him. His heart started pounding.

 

The laundry room was on fire.

 

The whole thing was glowing, the dryer and the wall next to it engulfed in flames.

 

Hinata ran back to his room and grabbed his phone, fumbling with it until he was able to dial for the fire department. He could hear the flames roaring outside his door but he couldn’t disconnect his phone from the charger. It would die and he’d never be able to call for help.

 

The smoke was getting worse, as was Hinata’s ability to breathe. The dispatcher said help was on its way and that he needed to try and get out of the house. He took the phone off the charger and it died almost immediately- stupid thing- and he ran out of his room, pulling his shirt over his mouth and nose.

 

The way to the staircase was blocked by the fire coming out of the laundry room and spreading. The flames roared and they were spreading faster than Hinata could think. He could hear himself wheezing and his eyes burned and watered and eventually, he realized that all he could do was stay in his room.

 

It didn’t take long for the fire to catch up with him there, too.

 

He couldn’t breathe.

 

It hurt.

 

Everything hurt.

 

Until it didn’t.

 

-

 

“Is he waking up?”

 

Pain.

 

“Shouyou? Can you hear me?”

 

Everything hurt. What was on his face?

 

“Shouyou, please say something.”

 

Hinata opened his eyes and the light penetrated his vision, causing him to wince. Shadows stood above him and continued talking, asking him questions that he couldn’t make out over the pain.

 

He didn’t even realize that he fell back asleep until he woke up again. The pain was still there, but he was able to see and hear past it.

 

“Shouyou?” His mother had tears on her cheeks and her eyes were swollen. “Oh, Shouyou.”

 

“The-“ Hinata coughed around the oxygen mask. It was taken off for him before he spoke. “The f-fire alarm... Didn’t go off.” His mom sniffed again and his dad squeezed his hand. “We... Should get that fixed.”

 

His dad chuckled. “I agree.”

 

Hinata looked down to the hand that was being held and gasped.

 

His hand was covered in burns and every other piece of skin was covered in bandages. Hinata let out a whimper and tried to move, but every time he did it sent waves of intense pain through the burned and sensitive skin all over his body. He could feel his tired lungs heaving with panic and tears stinging his eyes.

 

“Shouyou,” his mother said. “You’re okay. You’re going to be okay. Please calm down.”

 

“What-What- Is my face-?”

 

Hinata painfully brought his hands up to his face even though he could see the people around him telling him not to. What he felt was more bandages, more scabbed, blistered skin, and more pain. Hinata heard himself wail.

 

-

 

Days went by and Hinata still hadn’t mustered the courage to look at himself in the mirror. He denied any and all visitors that weren’t his parents- which included his sister, as much as it hurt to keep her away.

 

Even Kageyama wasn’t allowed to come. Just because he was Hinata’s boyfriend didn’t mean he got special treatment.

 

Treatment for his burns was painful. The nurses came in every few hours to cover his burns in some sort of salve that burned and stung as it went on.

 

“The doctor wants to do a skin graft,” his mom said. “They’ll take healthy skin and put it over the burns. What do you think?”

 

Hinata only nodded. The more awake and aware he was, the more pain he was in. It wouldn’t go away. No matter how he sat or if he slept, the pain was there- even in his dreams. All he wanted was for this to go away. He wanted to wake up from this nightmare.

 

“Your friends are worried about you,” his dad said. “They come every day hoping to see you.”

 

Instead of responding to the remark, he said, “I want to see my face.”

 

He saw his mother wince. “Maybe you should wait until after the surgery; When you heal up a little.”

 

“I want to see it now.”

 

His mother slowly reached into her purse and pulled out a small compact mirror. She handed it to him and he took it in a shaking hand, opening it and taking a deep breath before pointing it at his face.

 

The skin that covered most of his face was gorily mangled. The right side of his nose was disfigured and his right ear was bandaged still. He felt tears spring to his eyes and he wanted to scream. He looked like a Halloween costume. He looked like something that made children scream.

 

He looked like a monster.

 

All Hinata could produce was a whimper, breathless and barely there because all of the oxygen was drawn from his still recovering body. His mother stole the mirror from his hands and threw it out of reach, leaning over and gently embracing him.

 

He leaned far into the touch because even though his skin hurt like hell and he’d probably start bleeding again, he didn’t care. All he cared about was this hug, because no one had done anything like this since the fire. No one hugged him or barely touched him at all, because so much of him was burned and blackened and raw. Hinata just wanted to be touched. That was all he wanted.

 

He cried. He cried for a while and he couldn’t barely breathe while he was doing it, even with the help of oxygen tubing up his nose.

 

He was a monster.

 

-

 

The surgery came and went and Hinata didn’t take another look at his face. Even when they said he looked much better, he couldn’t do it. He couldn’t get that horrifying image out of his head. He didn’t want anyone to see his face.

 

So, you can imagine his rage when a certain setter walked into his room. Luckily, Hinata had the curtain closed so he saw Kageyama’s shoes and was able to cover his head with the covers before his boyfriend was able to get a look at him.

 

“Go away!”

 

There was a beat of silence. “Jeez, nice to see you too.”

 

Hinata heard Kageyama coming closer. “I said I don’t want visitors, who let you in here?”

 

“Your parents did,” Kageyama answered. “Your doctors were fine with it, too. They said it would be good for you to have some kind of human interaction- and I see why.”

 

“What’s that supposed to mean?!”

 

“You’re a hermit!” Hinata flinched. “You’ve been ignoring everyone for weeks, and I’m sick of it! We thought you were going to die!”

 

Hinata threw the blanket from him, facing Kageyama. “I wish I did!”

 

The silence that followed the yell was deafening, and the look on Kageyama’s face was one of vulnerability and horror- one that Hinata had never seen him wear. He didn’t say anything, even when Hinata started to cry.

 

“Look at me,” he sobbed. “I-I wish I died in that house. I can’t look in the mirror, I never want anyone to look at me again.”

 

“You didn’t die,” Kageyama said plainly.

 

“W-What?”

 

“You didn’t die,” he repeated. “You almost did, but you didn’t. Do you know how happy we were to find out you were alive? Stingyshima was even happy- and he hates you. If you died, I... I don’t know if I would’ve made it.”

 

“But...” Hinata cried. “But look at me.”

 

“You actually look a lot better than I expected you to look,” Kageyama said, sitting down on the bed.

 

Hinata raised his (non-existent) eyebrows. “Really?”

 

“Yeah.” The setter pulled out his phone and turned on the front facing camera. “Wanna see?”

 

Hinata reached out a trembling hand and took the phone. He saw his face and almost cried all over again. It was a vast improvement from before, now that he had a thin layer of skin that was healing and protecting his burns, but it was still ugly and discolored. He couldn’t tell if he was happy or sad.

 

“I still... I look horrible!” Hinata started sobbing. “I don’t want my sister to be scared of me!”

 

“She might, at first,” Kageyama deadpanned. Hinata glared at him. “What? I’m not going to lie to you. She will, because she’s a kid and kids don’t know not to make rude comments or stare at people who look different, but she’ll get used to it once she realizes that you’re still her brother.” Kageyama sighed. “You’re still you. Your scars won’t change that.”

 

Hinata just cried even more. “But,” he whispered shakily. “Look at me.”

 

Kageyama didn’t say anything then. He looked at Hinata with an expression of pain on his face and leaned in, wrapping him in a hug. Hinata quickly started sobbing even harder and returned the embrace.

 

“You’ll be okay, idiot,” he said. “You can’t give up.”

 

-

 

Several weeks went by and it was time for Hinata to go back to school. He was literally sick with anxiety. The healing process wasn’t complete yet, and the doctor said he still had another surgery to undergo, so his face was still mangled and his hair was still gone on part of his head. He got permission from his teachers to wear a hat, even though it violated the dress code. They seemed to take pity on him.

 

That morning, Hinata spent half an hour in front of the toilet, afraid his anxiety was going to make him throw up. His mom lured him from the bathroom saying that Natsu wanted to say goodbye to him before he left.

 

Natsu was reacting surprisingly well to his injuries. Hinata guessed that part of the reason she wasn’t as afraid as he expected was because he pushed her away for so long, so she missed him. Upon seeing her brother, she walked forward and placed a gentle kiss to the part of his cheek that wasn’t burned.

 

“Have a good day,” she said.

 

He smiled. “Thanks.”

 

Hinata pulled a beanie on his head and pulled a blazer over his school uniform to cover his arms and headed out the door. He went slower that morning, making sure he was going the right way on his new route from their new house- which was a bit closer to town than their old, demolished one.

 

He stood at the school gate, realizing he was a bit early and deciding to go to the gym where the volleyball team would be practicing. Hinata stood outside and silently cracked the door open, looking in at his friends practicing spiking. He felt a rush, smiling and longing to feel the ball smacking against his palm.

 

Without thinking, he pushed the door open the rest of the way and stepped inside. As everyone noticed, they stopped moving and stared. The smile that Hinata wore disappeared and he took a step backwards. No one spoke for a long moment and Hinata realized what a mistake this was.

 

He turned on his heel and ran from the gym, running across campus and stopping when he came to a willow tree. Hinata went under it and sat down in the shade, burying his face in his hands.

 

“Shouyou.”

 

The redhead looked up and saw Kageyama standing in front of him.

 

“What do you want,” he demanded.

 

“Come back,” Kageyama begged. “We just didn’t know you were coming back today, so we were surprised. Everyone wants to see you.”

 

“Did you see the way they looked at me?” Hinata wiped away a tear. “I look... Like a monster.”

 

“You don’t,” Kageyama said. “You look like someone who was in a house fire and went through a lot of pain to get to where he is now. You can’t expect people to not stare, but anyone in their right mind would see your scars as a reason why you’re brave.” He took another step forward and brought a hand up, grazing his fingers against Hinata’s cheek. “You’re beautiful.”

 

Hinata stared, not knowing what to say. He scowled because Kageyama was right, and he hated it when his boyfriend was right. He stood up, stomping ahead of Kageyama and going back to the gym. Approaching the doors, he took a deep breath and opened them. Everyone was standing in front of him, smiles on their faces.

 

“Shouyou!”

 

Nishinoya came from nowhere and launched himself at the redhead, tackling him in a hug. Hinata couldn’t help but laugh. When he was released, Daichi approached him.

 

“It’s good to have you back,” the captain said. “Are you good to start playing again?”

 

“Ah,” Hinata said. “Not yet. I still have a lot of recovery to do- but I can still stretch and run and work out. They just don’t want me hitting the ball while my skin is still...”

 

He trailed off and Daichi nodded. “That’s fine. Do whatever you’re able to do, okay?”

 

Hinata nodded and the smile on his face grew. To his team, he wasn’t a monster. He was brave. He was still himself.

 

He was beautiful.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> requests are OPEN!! it will take a while for me to get to each request but as long as you’re patient, i plan on giving each prompt a try  
> if you give me many prompts i will most likely only choose one to do though  
> thanks for reading!


	6. The Broken Road

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fangirl: “Hinatas parents are in jail and he’s a foster child”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for the radio silence

“What have you been doing the last three years?!”

 

The words stung for Hinata more than they would for any other kid. What was he doing the last three years? Bouncing around from house to house with his baby sister, fighting tooth and nail to make sure they stayed together no matter what.

 

That was why he vowed to beat Kageyama Tobio. He had to show him that he was worth something, even when his foster parents told him otherwise.

 

Hinata and Natsu were put into the foster system when Hinata was ten and Natsu was just a few months old. Their parents were arrested for many things, really, but what truly got them busted was drug trafficking and neglecting their kids.

 

They went through countless foster families by the time Hinata was in high school. Some families had nearly a dozen kids, sometimes all sharing one room that didn’t even have enough beds for half of them. Sometimes they tried to take Natsu away, but Hinata saw what happened to young girls in foster homes. He had to protect her no matter what, at least until they were in a safe home with people they could trust.

 

That time just happened to come right when Hinata started his first year of high school.

 

The Hinata children were placed with a couple who couldn’t have children of their own, and also were fostering to adopt. Hinata held Natsu’s hand as they stepped into the house holding their backpacks and when they saw the warm smiles on the couple’s faces, they knew they were home.

 

They both got their own room, but Natsu insisted on sleeping in Hinata’s room- even if she hadn’t, he would’ve insisted on it, himself. The foster parents bought them new clothes, got them much needed haircuts, gave them plenty of food- they even bought Hinata a phone and paid for him to participate in volleyball.

 

Hinata knew that with the support he was finally getting, he could beat Kageyama Tobio in no time.

 

So you can imagine his disappointment when he found out that they were attending the same school.

 

It was rough, but they... tolerated each other. Part of their partnership was making sure they had good enough grades to keep participating in club activities, so Kageyama invited him over to study one day.

 

“I have to ask my foster mom,” Hinata said, not even realizing that it was his first time mentioning the fact that he was in foster care. “Actually, how about you just come to my house? I don’t like leaving my sister alone for too long.”

 

“Uh, sure.”

 

Kageyama seemed wary of his situation, but, emotionally constipated as he was, didn’t mention it or ask any questions. He seemed to realize when they got to Hinata’s house that he wasn’t very different after all, so he got more comfortable.

 

Their first training camp was hard. Hinata called his sister several times each day because being away from her hurt more than anything he’d ever felt in his life. He cried silently the first night, but got through the rest of them fairly well.

 

Things were perfect. Hinata had food on his plate, clothes on his back, and knew he was loved and safe. He had parents and an amazing volleyball team and his sister was happy. Despite this, Hinata was waiting for the other shoe to drop. It always did, something always went wrong.

 

One day, Hinata was in practice, spiking the balls that Kageyama tossed to him, when he was called to the side by Coach Ukai.

 

Hinata hadn’t realized the social worker that walked in until that moment.

 

His stomach dropped and he didn’t move for a second once his eyes landed on the name tag that stated the man’s occupation. He felt his lungs being squeezed as he walked and stopped in front of the man.

 

“How are-“ The social worker began, no doubt asking pointless questions before getting to the real point, the point that Hinata was waiting for.

 

“Are you going to take me away?” He heard his voice cracking and felt tears flood his eyes. “You can’t take me away, I like it here. I-I want to stay-“

 

“Hold on,” the social worker said. “We don’t know about that yet. Things are still in the air. Just come with me and we can talk-“

 

“No,” Hinata said stubbornly. “I’m not going with you! I’m staying here.”

 

“Sir,” Coach interrupted. “If Hinata doesn’t want to go with you, I’m afraid I have to keep him here until his legal guardian comes to pick him up. I’m sure you understand, right?”

 

The social worker pursed his lips. “Alright then,” he said. “Someone will be back to get you later.”

 

The man left and Hinata felt his heart in his throat. He realized that his teammates were staring and turned on his heel, running to the bathroom and locking himself in a stall to cry. They couldn’t take him away, not now- what if they wanted to adopt Natsu but not him? What if they secretly hated him? What if-

 

“Hinata?” Suga’s voice rang through the bathroom, interrupting Hinata’s crying. “Are you okay?”

 

“They’re going to take me away,” Hinata said, opening the door. “This is the first foster family that I actually like, and they want to take me away!”

 

Suga came forward and hugged him. “That man didn’t say that he was taking you away,” he said. “He said they hadn’t made a decision yet. You never know!”

 

“The last time they did that, Natsu and I were moved the same night. What if they try to separate us again?”

 

Suga sighed. “I don’t know,” he said, sounding defeated. “We just have to wait and see. Do you want to go spike some tosses to get your mind off of it for the next hour or so?”

 

Hinata stood up straight. “I guess.”

 

Suga and Kageyama took turns tossing to him and Hinata spiked ball after ball, without taking breaks. By the time practice was over, he was covered in sweat and his calves ached so much it was hard to walk.

 

Then, the door opened and the social worker stepped through. Hinata wanted to run, to find Natsu and take her and never come back, but he didn’t. He followed the social worker outside and was surprised to see his foster parents’ car parked by the school, Natsu sitting in the back. Was this it? Was his time at Karasuno over?

 

“Shouyou,” his foster mother said, taking his hand. “I have a question to ask you, and I want you to be honest.” She paused, biting her lip anxiously and glancing at her husband. “Would you be okay with us adopting you and Natsu?”

 

Hinata felt tears flood his vision. “W-What?”

 

“We’ve been talking it over with your case manager all afternoon,” his foster father said. “We talked to Natsu already and she was thrilled. All we need is your opinion, then we can set a court date.”

 

All Hinata could do was nod. He couldn’t speak because when he tried, all that came out was a relieved sob. He jumped into his parents’ arms and they hugged him close.

 

This was it. There was no more fighting to be fed, seen, heard, or loved. He had friends and now he had a family- a permanent family.

 

Suddenly, it was all worth it.


	7. Give Me Shelter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hello: “An orphanage au”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Part 1

Kageyama Tobio walked through the doors of the building and immediately smelled freshly cooked bread. The atmosphere of the place was unlike that of any other orphanage Kageyama had stepped foot in- though he had only been an orphan for the past five months. Everything from the lighting to the smells to the color of the wooden staircase felt homey. It was a feeling he hadn’t felt since his parents died.

 

“Welcome to Karasuno’s Orphan Home,” Takeda, the man who escorted him in, said. “You can go to your left into the living room and sit down on the couch. I’ll go get Ukai and let him know you’re here.”

 

Kageyama watched Takeda leave the room and looked around. The house looked old- the wood trim on the walls and door frames with intricate carvings. There was a stone fireplace on the wall to his right, the color complimenting that of the coffee table. It was by far the nicest of all the homes Kageyama had stayed in so far. He didn’t even know orphanages this nice existed.

 

There was a sudden thud and Kageyama looked over by the staircase. There was a boy with orange hair peeking around the wall, only revealing one wide golden eye. When Kageyama looked over, the boy flinched and after a moment of eye contact, he ran up the stairs.

 

“I assume you’re Kageyama.”

 

The blue eyed boy saw a man with long blonde hair emerging from beyond the staircase. He stepped forward and held out his hand.

 

“I’m Ukai,” he said as Kageyama stood and shook the man’s hand. “I run this place. I inherited this property from my father and since it was so big, I figured I might as well take in a few people. Come with me.”

 

They went further into the house and approached a dining room with a long table and several chairs around it. There was a window leading into a kitchen and a door next to it.

 

“This is where we have our meals,” Ukai said. “Breakfast is at seven thirty, lunch is at noon, and dinner is at six. If you get hungry in between meals, stop by the kitchen and grab something.”

 

They went through the door to the kitchen and Kageyama saw two boys, one large and one rather small, standing and preparing food. They both turned when they came in and the large one gave a small, welcoming smile while the smaller one flashed a toothy grin.

 

“This is Asahi and Nishinoya,” Ukai said. “They’re usually on kitchen duty. Asahi here is a wonderful cook. Noya, well... He tries his best.” Nishinoya scowled and Asahi’s weary smile grew. “Boys, this is Kageyama.”

 

“Nice to meet you,” Asahi said.

 

“I’m actually a good cook,” Nishinoya said. Ukai sent him a glance. “Oh, and nice to meet you.”

 

Kageyama gave an awkward smile and waved while Ukai led them back out into the dining room. Beyond the dining room was a small storage room, cluttered with dirty shoes.

 

“This leads to the backyard,” Ukai said. “This is also where we keep shoes for yard work and the likes.” Kageyama looked out into the backyard and saw a red barn in the distance. “That’s also ours,” Ukai said. “We raise chickens in the summer, and we keep horses year round. Someone will take you by tomorrow.”

 

They went back through the dining room and upstairs. There were several bedrooms there, the one at the end of the hallway being Kageyama’s.

 

“You’re sharing with Yamaguchi,” Ukai said. “Yamaguchi, this is Kageyama.”

 

Yamaguchi was a boy with olive-brown hair and freckles covering his nose. He smiled awkwardly at Kageyama and Kageyama gave his own awkward smile in return.

 

“Dinner is in an hour,” Ukai said, closing the door.

 

Kageyama set his backpack down on his bed and began to unpack his clothes.

 

“So,” Yamaguchi said. “Where did you come from?”

 

“A family on the other side of Miyagi,” Kageyama replied. “They weren’t too bad. They just had too many kids there. I was there for a good month and a half.”

 

“And before that?”

 

Kageyama scowled. “Group home in Tokyo.”

 

Yamaguchi winced. “Tokyo Asylum for Boys?”

 

Kageyama nodded. It was a place where meals were few and far between. It was hugely overcrowded and most of the boys were violent and rowdy. The staff was mean and there weren’t enough beds. It was the kind of place where many kids were sent when there just wasn’t any other place for them. Kageyama spent the first few months since he became an orphan there.

 

“How long have you been bouncing around?”

 

“Not long,” Kageyama said. “How about you?”

 

“Since I was seven,” Yamaguchi replied. “Parents left me in a supermarket and disappeared.”

 

Kageyama nodded sadly. “Do you know who the small kid with the red hair is?”

 

“Hinata?” Yamaguchi said.

 

“I guess,” Kageyama replied. “Why’s he so... Skittish?”

 

“He’s been through a lot,” Yamaguchi informed. “More than most of us. No one besides Ukai and Takeda really knows anything because he doesn’t talk.”

 

Kageyama pursed his lips and got back to unpacking his things.

 

When six o’clock came, Kageyama went downstairs for dinner. Several teenagers were sitting around the table and Kageyama sat down in the only empty seat.

 

“Hi,” said the boy next to him, one with ashen hair. “I’m Suga.”

 

“Kageyama,” the blue eyed boy replied.

 

To his left was Nishinoya and on the other side of Nishinoya was that red haired kid- Hinata. There was something about him that interested Kageyama. He was an enigma, a puzzle that needed to be solved.

 

“Let’s go around and introduce ourselves,” Takeda excitedly suggested.

 

There were a few groans from around the table, but what caught Kageyama’s eye was how Hinata’s expression turned into one of fear.

 

“I’ll start,” Takeda said. “I’m Takeda, I helped Ukai get approved to foster kids.” He looked to his left. “Ukai, your turn!”

 

“I’m Ukai, you all know the whole spiel about what I do. Enough about me. Daichi?”

 

“Ah, hi,” Daichi said. “I’m Daichi, I’ve been in the foster system pretty much my whole life and I was one of the first kids here twelve years ago.”

 

“I’m Suga,” the next boy said. “I’ve been here... Most of my life, I guess. I came here a little while after Daichi did and I’ve been here ever since.”

 

“Uh- I’m Kageyama Tobio,” the blue eyed boy stuttered awkwardly. “I’ve only been in the system for a few months, so... I don’t really know what else to say.”

 

“Perfect!” Nishinoya yelled. “I’m Noya, and I’ve been here just over three years and this is the best foster home ever! Also, try the chicken casserole! It’s great, I made it, myself.”

 

There were scattered laughs and then all eyes were on Hinata. His cheeks reddened and his eyes widened and he seemed to shrink under everyone’s gaze. He was obviously panicking until Suga swept in to save him.

 

“That’s Hinata,” Suga said. “He’s been here almost a year. He’s been in the system since he was... Really young, right?”

 

Hinata nodded, staring at his lap. They moved on to a girl named Yachi, who had been there for a brief period of time and had only been in the system for a year or so. Next was Shimizu, who was born into the system and had been at this orphanage for several years. Asahi came next and he had been in the system since he was nine. Tsukishima said he’d been in the system since he was eight and was placed straight at Karasuno, and Kageyama already knew Yamaguchi.

 

Kageyama tried the chicken casserole. It was the worst thing he’d ever tasted, but he didn’t let on, telling Noya that it tasted great. The meal consisted of stories and laughs, creating the feeling that they were a family. It was more than Kageyama ever could have wished for.

 

When dinner was over, everyone helped clean up. It was no one person’s job to clean the dishes, everyone helped wipe down the table and clean up the kitchen and put the leftovers in containers.

 

Kageyama was on his way into the kitchen, holding several empty glasses in his hands, when someone’s small body slammed into him. He saw the orange haired boy stumble backwards and fall as the cups fell out of Kageyama’s hand, smashing on the floor.

 

His first instinct was to yell. It was to scream because dammit he was trying to make a good impression on his new family and if he messed up they had the power to send him away.

 

Kageyama bit his tongue because Hinata was shaking under him before he could even get any words out. Kageyama could see his chest heaving and his lip quivering as he scrambled up, running from the room. The raven haired boy looked up and saw everyone staring at him.

 

“I-I didn’t mean to...” He trailed off because Ukai was stepping forward.

 

“It was an accident,” he said. “Just clean it up, it’s fine. We can get new ones- they aren’t expensive. I’m just going to go check on Hinata.”

 

Ukai walked past him and Asahi handed him a broom and dust pan. He swept it up and everyone went back to working.

 

“Why did he freak out,” Kageyama asked Nishinoya, who approached him with a bag to put the shards in.

 

“I think he was abused or something,” Noya said. “Worse than most of us, I’m guessing. I’m not sure. I share a room with him and he has nightmares a lot.”

 

Kageyama furrowed his brow and Nishinoya went to walk away with the trash but Kageyama stopped him.

 

“I didn’t mean to scare him,” he said. “I wasn’t gonna... Hurt him or anything.”

 

Nishinoya gave him a sad smile. “I know.”

 

After they finished cleaning, everyone went to their rooms. People began taking showers and such, getting ready to go to sleep, and Kageyama spent some time in his room. All he did was lay on his bed and stare at the ceiling, trying to figure out the puzzle that was Hinata.

 

It was bugging him too much. He’d never be able to sleep that way.

 

Kageyama got up and walked out of the room, peering into each room he passed until he found the one that Hinata and Nishinoya shared. He knocked on the door and it creaked open and Hinata’s face paled. Before he could bolt, Kageyama stepped inside.

 

“I’m sorry for scaring you,” he said, bowing his head when he spoke. “I was mad, but there’s no way in hell I would ever hurt you. Please don’t be afraid of me.”

 

He looked up and saw Hinata wearing a look of surprise, but it turned into a softer expression that sported the slightest smile. The red headed boy nodded and Kageyama nodded back, retreating from the room.

 

Maybe that was the first piece of the puzzle.

 

-

 

The next morning, Kageyama was woken up around six thirty so he could start working in the kitchen to make breakfast. Ukai said he’d try out each kind of chore until he found one that suited him best.

 

“So, Kageyama,” Nishinoya began as they started to prepare the meal. “What do you like to do?”

 

“I, uh...” He stuttered. “I run. A lot. I-I play- er, I played volleyball.”

 

“Oh, cool!” Noya exclaimed. “Were you any good?”

 

Kageyama went on to describe what his team was like and Nishinoya seemed intrigued, Asahi shyly piping in every once in a while.

 

“It was really nice of you to apologize to Hinata,” Nishinoya said. “Even though you didn’t really do anything. Some of us had it rough- y’know, I was kept in a cage for the majority of my childhood. I think you made him feel safer by saying what you said.”

 

“So,” Kageyama began hesitantly. “No one knows what happened to him?”

 

“Takeda and Ukai know some of the details,” Noya said. “But they never tell us anything. I’ve never heard Hinata say anything besides when he talks in his sleep, so he obviously hasn’t told anyone anything.”

 

It really disturbed Kageyama that so many of these people were so horribly abused. He’d always heard that about the foster system, but he hadn’t experienced the true horrors it can bring firsthand.

 

Once breakfast was done, people started showing up in the dining room to eat. Just like dinner the night before, it was a buffet style meal, spread out across the long table. There was toast and eggs and bacon and it was probably the best breakfast Kageyama had had in months.

 

After they were finished, Kageyama helped clean up and Ukai came back and sent him to work with Yamaguchi and Tsukishima. They cleaned and dusted and swept most of the day, so Kageyama figured it would be easier than cooking- which he sucked at, by the way.

 

They started in the bathrooms and worked their way out. Kageyama considered himself to be good at cleaning but Tsukishima had other thoughts.

 

“You call that a clean mirror?” The blonde boy snickered. “There’s streaks all over it. Why would you even try it if you have no idea how to clean a mirror properly?”

 

Kageyama scowled. “If you’re so good at it, do it yourself.”

 

They went back and forth arguing the majority of the time- so much so that Yamaguchi literally had to separate them. Thankfully, Ukai came back and switched him to yard work duty with Suga and Daichi.

 

“We were just weeding the front garden,” Suga said. “It’s not a lot, but it feels like more when it’s this hot.”

 

“Make sure you get the roots,” Daichi instructed. “Otherwise this will all be pointless.”

 

Kageyama did so and, surprisingly, weeding the front garden and the dirt areas by the trees took up a long time.

 

“Why’d you end up in foster care,” Suga asked. “If you don’t mind me asking, that is. Not a lot of people go into the system at your age.”

 

“My parents were killed in a car accident,” Kageyama said. “They were both only children, and neither of them had parents still living, so I was put in the system.”

 

“I’m sorry for your loss,” Suga said. “I’m here if you need anyone to talk to.”

 

“Suga’s basically the mom of the place,” Daichi pointed out.

 

“No I’m not!”

 

Kageyama snickered. “Thanks, Suga.”

 

When it was time for Kageyama to switch again, it was with Yachi and Shimizu doing laundry.

 

“Our jobs change depending on what Ukai needs us to do,” Yachi said. “S-So this isn’t what we do all the time... What am I saying, you probably could’ve just assumed that- and now I’m just rambling. I’m just going to shut up now. I’m sorry!”

 

Kageyama started. “No! You-You’re fine! It’s good to know that the jobs change sometimes.”

 

Yachi’s nervous rambling went on and it was endearing, really. Shimizu had to remind her to breathe every so often because she would get so anxious and talkative that she would forget to take a breath between sentences. Kageyama could barely get a word in, but it seemed like all of her words were the product of sheer anxiety- and when she wasn’t speaking she was fidgety and her leg would always bounce up and down.

 

Lunch came soon and it was mostly grab-and-go type of stuff. Kageyama grabbed a sandwich and went to sit outside with Suga and Daichi. He was leaning towards joining them in their chore regiment, but he also enjoyed working in the kitchen with Nishinoya and Asahi.

 

“Don’t decide just yet,” Daichi said. “You still have to see how you like working with the animals.”

 

When lunch was over, Ukai walked with him towards the barn. The sun was still beating down on them and sweat beaded on Kageyama’s forehead, so he was eager to be in the shade of the barn.

 

“Hinata’s usually the only one out here,” Ukai said. “Tending to the animals is therapeutic for him. I’m sure you remember how... easily scared he is.” Kageyama nodded. “I’m sure you also know he doesn’t talk. Don’t pressure him to and try not to move too suddenly around him.” Ukai stopped. “Unless you don’t feel comfortable working with him. I don’t want you to do anything you don’t want to.”

 

“N-No,” Kageyama said. “It’s fine. I think I’d actually rather work in the quiet.”

 

Ukai smiled slightly. “Alright.”

 

They walked into the barn and Kageyama laid his eyes on Hinata, brushing the fur of a horse in a stall to the left. To the right were several bales of hay, and Kageyama could hear chickens clucking from somewhere. Hinata turned around and stared, bringing his hand up and waving slightly. Kageyama looked into his eyes and felt warm.

 

“The chickens are in a coop behind the barn,” Ukai said suddenly, ripping Kageyama’s attention from Hinata’s honey brown eyes. “They’re dual purpose, so they lay eggs and we’ll have a butcher harvest the meat at the end of the summer. We have three horses, but that one over there,” the man pointed to the one Hinata was brushing. “Isn’t for riding. His name is Sapphire and he’s pretty aggressive, so if you want to go riding, don’t ride him. Groom the horses daily and get eggs, too. Any questions?”

 

Kageyama shook his head.

 

“Great. Hinata will show you what to do.”

 

Ukai left and Hinata and Kageyama made eye contact for a while before Hinata turned and went back to brushing the horse. Kageyama went up close to watch and then grabbed a brush of his own and started brushing the horse in the next stall over, a horse called Ruby. He looked over to Hinata every so often and saw him pick up a tool that had an edge to it and begin brushing the horse with it, scraping off any mud that was on its fur.

 

Kageyama attempted to do the same, but the mud wouldn’t come off and he was afraid to use any more force- he didn’t want to hurt the horse. He looked to Hinata and the ginger came over to him, standing right in front of him so his hair brushed against Kageyama’s nose. It smelled like vanilla.

 

Hinata placed his hand over Kageyama’s and directed him in brushing the horse, applying more pressure and causing the dirt to scrape right off. The feeling of Hinata’s hand on his sent electricity through him and the warm feeling came back, stronger this time.

 

Kageyama knew that this was where he belonged.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so sorry for the delay. i was in the hospital this week and i’m still not feeling great.  
> anyway, as of today i have been on AO3 for two years!! i think that’s pretty cool.  
> requests still closed.


	8. Give Me Shelter: Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hello: “An orphanage au”

Days passed and Kageyama and Hinata grew closer. Kageyama was getting closer to solving the puzzle that was Hinata Shouyou.

 

The boy didn’t seem to like broccoli, or most vegetables, but he ate them anyway even though his nose scrunched up in disgust. When he was concerned or anxious, he’d bite the inside of his cheek, and when he focused he’d twirl his hair or stick his tongue out ever so slightly. He particularly liked Sapphire, even though Ukai said he was untamed. They seemed to be able to communicate and calm each other down silently. He didn’t smile much, but when he did it would be gentle and warm. Kageyama never once heard the sound of his voice, but he was able to discover Hinata’s childlike, yet polite personality.

 

It was a week or so into Kageyama’s stay there when he walked outside to help groom the horses to find that Hinata was already out riding. Upon further investigation, Kageyama was shocked to find out that he was riding none other than Sapphire- the horse that was supposedly unrideable.

 

“Hey!” Kageyama shouted, running up to the fence. “Get off of him! He might-“

 

The sound of his voice not only made Hinata jump, but Sapphire as well. The horse flailed around until Hinata was sent flying off of him, tumbling to the ground with a grunt.

 

Kageyama winced and hopped the fence, ignoring Sapphire’s upset whinnying and running straight over to the redhead.

 

“I’m so sorry,” Kageyama said anxiously. “I-I didn’t mean to- God, are you okay?”

 

Hinata had sat himself up, but he was clutching his arm with an expression of pain on his face.

 

“Let me see,” Kageyama said, reaching out.

 

Hinata flinched slightly, but then uncurled from around his left arm and allowed Kageyama to get a good look. When he moved it, Hinata let out a loud whimper but brought his right hand quickly to cover his mouth as if he said something horrible. The arm itself was rapidly bruising around his thumb and wrist.

 

“Can you move it,” Kageyama asked.

 

The ginger shook his head. There were tears dripping from his eyes and he sniffled, but it looked like he was holding his breath, like he wouldn’t let himself cry or make a sound, even when he was in pain.

 

“Come on,” Kageyama said. “Let’s get back to the house.”

 

He grabbed Hinata’s arms and helped him stand, keeping an arm wrapped around his shaking shoulders as they walked across the field. Kageyama swung the door open when they reached the house, causing it to bang and Hinata to flinch.

 

“Ukai?” Kageyama called. “Takeda?”

 

The men emerged from the dining room with worried looks on their faces.

 

“Hinata was riding Sapphire, and he got bucked off,” Kageyama said, but he felt Hinata kick him slightly and looked down to see him scowling. He sighed. “Because I scared him. Still, I think his arm is broken.”

 

“Let me see,” Ukai said, reaching out while Hinata slowly revealed his arm.

 

The man took it and tried to bend it and Hinata exhaled sharply, bringing his other hand up to his mouth once again. Ukai let go of the arm.

 

“We should take you to the hospital,” he decided. “Takeda, you should stay here. We’ll be back later.”

 

Hinata sent Kageyama a scared glance while Ukai let the others know they were leaving, his eyebrows furrowed and his eyes wide.

 

“Hey, it’ll be okay,” Kageyama assured, placing a hand on the shorter’s arm. “They’ll take care of you and you’ll be fine in no time. I’ll take care of Sapphire. No worries.”

 

The redhead nodded in response and followed Ukai out the front door.

 

“Get Sapphire in his pen,” Takeda said wearily. “I’m going to make sure Yachi isn’t freaking out.”

 

Kageyama did as he was told. When he went back out towards the barn, Sapphire was grazing along, as if nothing had happened. With a scowl, Kageyama went forward and started bringing the horse back to its stall. Sapphire resisted weakly at first, seemingly just to be difficult, but relented eventually.

 

It was around dinner time that Hinata and Ukai came back. They walked in just as the table was being set and all eyes were on Hinata and the soft cast on his arm.

 

“He needs to go back in a week to get a hard cast,” Ukai said. “It should only take six weeks to heal.”

 

“Wow, Shouyou!” Nishinoya ran out from the kitchen. “What color do you want to get your cast?”

 

Hinata thought for a moment and then pointed to Nishinoya’s light blue shirt with a slight smile on his face.

 

“Awesome,” Noya exclaimed.

 

They all sat down and ate, but Hinata switched seats with Noya so he could sit by Kageyama. It made the taller boy happy that Hinata enjoyed his company as much as Kageyama did. Whenever their elbows brushed together, Kageyama felt that warm feeling spread throughout his body. All he wanted was for Hinata to be his, and only his.

 

Ukai described that Hinata’s break wasn’t severe, but he needed to rest his arm as much as possible- which meant he couldn’t lift hay, so Kageyama had to do it all by himself. Hinata seemed to know he was thinking this, because he sent Kageyama this sly smile, one laced with satisfaction. The blue eyed boy chuckled, elbowing Hinata jokingly.

 

Later that night, Kageyama once again couldn’t get calm enough to sleep. Yamaguchi was laying in bed reading and many of the other kids were in the living room playing games. Kageyama was just tired- but he couldn’t get his brain to shut off and stop thinking about Hinata. All he wanted was the redhead. He was all that was important now.

 

He stood, whipping the door open and stomping down the hallway towards Hinata’s room. He knocked and the redhead opened the door, looking up at him with surprise as he let himself into the room, noting that Nishinoya wasn’t there. Hinata wore shorts and a very large t-shirt, making Kageyama even more nervous.

 

“Look,” Kageyama said as Hinata shut the door behind him. “I just... I feel... God!”

 

Hinata took a step back before Kageyama took a deep breath. The redhead seemed to calm down and sat down on his bed while Kageyama paced around the room.

 

“I can’t- I can’t help how I feel,” Kageyama stammered. “I don’t know how to make it go away, or what to do about it, so...”

 

He stopped pacing and stared at Hinata’s lips. He wasn’t sure what possessed him to make him lunge forward and place a hand on Hinata’s cheek, going in for those lips with his own. He kissed Hinata and it was freeing. It was one of the most satisfying things he’d ever done.

 

Until he realized his mistake. Hinata wasn’t kissing him back. He was tense. His eyes were open. Kageyama stepped away and looked at the surprised look on Hinata’s face. He felt his breathing quicken.

 

“I-I...” He said breathlessly. “I’m sorry, I’ll just...”

 

Kageyama quickly turned to walk out the door. He didn’t know what he was thinking. Why would he just kiss him like that? Why did he ever think that was a good idea?

 

“Wait.”

 

It was barely above a whisper, but it was enough to make Kageyama stop in his tracks. He turned around and looked at Hinata, who had a look of embarrassment on his face.

 

Then, Kageyama surged back forward and planted their lips together again. This time, Hinata kissed back. He fisted a hand in Kageyama’s hair and Kageyama placed a hand on his waist. Hinata laid back and Kageyama crawled on top of him, going in for his neck. He heard Hinata let out a few pants of pleasure and eventually he realized that he shouldn’t leave marks, so he stopped. Kageyama stared down at the ginger, who lay beneath him panting, hair a mess.

 

“I think I love you,” Kageyama whispered.

 

All Hinata did was smile and from the look in his eyes, Kageyama knew the feeling was mutual.

 

They lay next to each other for a while, Kageyama holding Hinata close and Hinata snuggling into the taller’s shirt. This was what Kageyama was waiting for for all this time. This is the kind of love he needed to stay grounded in this unpredictable life.

 

This was home.

 

-

 

It was the next week, shortly after Hinata got his new blue cast. Kageyama woke that morning and went out towards the bathroom when Ukai placed a hand on his shoulder.

 

“I need to talk with you,” he said.

 

Kageyama’s stomach immediately dropped and he nodded, following Ukai into his study, lined with full bookshelves. He sat in a chair next to Ukai’s desk and stared at him cautiously.

 

“I hear that you and Hinata are... Involved,” he said.

 

Kageyama blanched. Was this not allowed? Would one of them have to be moved?

 

“It’s fine with me,” Ukai continued, and Kageyama felt a release on his lungs. “But I just need to warn you- if you hurt him, you’ll be out of here.” The look on Ukai’s face was serious. “I like you, kid, but if you put Hinata through any more pain than he’s already been through, there will be consequences.”

 

“What...” Kageyama cleared his throat. “What has he been through?”

 

Ukai’s face turned grim. “All I know is that there was a lot of abuse in his last foster home. He was there for a very long time before he was almost beaten to death and had to be removed. I don’t know any of the details, but I know that he’s still healing. I don’t think he can take any setbacks. Understand?”

 

Kageyama put his head down slightly and nodded. “Yes, sir.”

 

“Good,” Ukai said, smile returning to his face. ”Let’s get down to breakfast.”

 

Kageyama knew that Ukai meant well. He knew the man would never do anything maliciously and was only trying to protect Hinata as best as he could, so it was fine that he tried to scare Kageyama a little bit.

 

At breakfast, Kageyama and Hinata sat next to each other once again. Hinata kept bringing his hand over to squeeze Kageyama’s and it was nice, it made the taller smile and he couldn’t wait until they were alone in the barn.

 

When the time came, Kageyama and Hinata raced out to the barn. They ran as fast as they could, the sun beating down on them, until Kageyama won.

 

“Ha!” He shouted. “Looks like we’re tied now! I’ll beat you next-“

 

He was cut off when Hinata let out a gasp and took off running further into the barn. Kageyama followed him, puzzled, until they approached Sapphire’s stall.

 

The horse was laying down on its side and his breathing looked labored.

 

Hinata threw the stall door open and kneeled down next to the horse, placing an ear on his chest and listening. Sapphire whinnied quietly, tail whipping weakly.

 

“I’ll-“ Kageyama stuttered. “I’ll go get Ukai.”

 

With tears in his eyes, the redhead nodded. Kageyama took off running back towards the house and ran around, searching for their foster father. He found him in the study when he burst in. Ukai looked like he was about to reprimand him for barging in, but Kageyama didn’t give him the chance.

 

“Call the vet,” he said breathlessly. “It’s Sapphire.”

 

-

 

The vet stood, a defeated look on his face. “I don’t know what to say,” he said. “This horse is old. I think it’s time for him to go. I can euthanize him if-“

 

Hinata sniffled loudly and shook his head wildly. Everyone was in the barn now, watching as the redhead leaned over the horse and continued to stroke his hair.

 

“Shouyou,” Takeda said, kneeling by him. “Sapphire is in pain. We can end it if we let him go.”

 

The ginger was covered in tears and snot and Kageyama went and kneeled down close to him, rubbing circles into his back.

 

“It’s time to let him go,” Kageyama whispered.

 

Hinata’s face screwed up and he nodded slowly, standing up while the vet approached the horse.

 

“You can stay with him while he goes,” the vet said. “I think it will comfort him.”

 

Hinata sat down next to Sapphire and stroked his mane while Kageyama held him. Just before he was sedated, Sapphire moved his head to look up at Hinata and the redhead just started crying even more- devastated, but silent. When it was all over, when Sapphire stopped breathing, Hinata threw himself over him and held on, shoulders heaving quietly. Kageyama got a bit teary eyed himself.

 

Later on, Hinata had locked himself in his room. Nishinoya had given up, so it was Kageyama’s turn to try and get him to open the door.

 

“Hinata,” he said. “Please let me in. You shouldn’t be going through this alone.” There was no response. “Shouyou, please.” He paused. “I want to help you... To hold you.”

 

There were a few beats of silence and the door opened, revealing a very distraught looking ginger with swollen eyes and blotchy cheeks, bottom lip quivering. Kageyama walked inside, closing the door behind him and following Hinata to his bed where he laid down. Kageyama laid next to him, spooning him and hugging him close while his shoulders shook. Still, Hinata seemed to refuse to make noise.

 

“You can cry,” Kageyama said. “It’s okay to cry. Just let it out.”

 

The floodgates opened and Hinata let out a wail. He kept crying, getting louder and louder, and eventually Ukai came in with a worried look on his face. He and Kageyama made eye contact and the man gave him a knowing look before retreating.

 

Hinata cried and cried until he got tired and then Kageyama just held him close while his breathing calmed. They lay there for a long time, undisturbed, before Kageyama spoke.

 

“See? Crying is good,” he said. “You need to let it out sometimes. You can’t stay quiet forever.”

 

There was silence before Kageyama heard that soft voice again.

 

“They’d beat me,” it whispered. “If I made noise.”

 

Kageyama winced. He just wanted to cry because Hinata didn’t deserve that, he deserved the world and more.

 

“You’re not there anymore,” he pointed out. “The people here love you- I love you. I like hearing your voice.”

 

Hinata maneuvered his body so he could turn around and face Kageyama. He looked at him with a small fire in his eyes, a fire Kageyama worried he wouldn’t ever see. The shorter stretched his neck upward and pressed a kiss to Kageyama’s lips.

 

“I love you,” Hinata said, snuggling into his chest.

 

Kageyama smiled, trying to blink away the tears in his eyes. He’d said it before and he’ll say it again-

 

He was home.

 

“I love you, too.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> PSA: IF YOU GIVE ME A PROMPT WHILE REQUESTS ARE CLOSED I WILL NOT DO THAT PROMPT!!   
> pls wait until requests are open i get stressed easily


	9. Rolling Thunder: Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sarah requested a sequel to Rolling Thunder

“Come on, Shouyou, you can do it!”

 

Nishinoya sat in the physical therapy center watching Hinata attempt to walk with bars on either side of him for support. He took one step, then another, then another, and the look of strain on his face turned into a smile.

 

“Look,” the spiker said breathlessly, still taking slow and clumsy steps. “I’m doing it! I-I-“

 

Then, there was a misstep that sent Hinata toppling over. Noya stood up quickly, but had to sit back down because dizziness overtook him. The physical therapist was there for Hinata, anyway.

 

Nishinoya was glad he was able to come to today’s therapy session. He was only allowed to go because he had a doctor’s appointment of his own beforehand. His concussion had been bad, and left long term symptoms- headaches, dizzy spells, risk for seizures- that he’d likely have to live with for the rest of his life.

 

Hinata was situated back in his wheelchair and Noya stood, slower this time, and made his way over.

 

“I’ll never be able to jump again,” the first year cried.

 

“Yes, you will,” the libero replied. “You’re just going to have to work hard at it.”

 

“I already have been working hard,” Hinata pouted.

 

“Yes,” Nishinoya said. “And you’ve already been improving. Just last week you could barely stand! You just have to be patient.”

 

With Hinata’s mother’s permission, Noya steered the wheelchair down to the cafeteria. They got pizza and sat down at a table.

 

“Did you hear about Suga?” Hinata asked, licking pizza sauce off of his fingers. “Apparently there was a tear in a part of his shoulder that kept growing, so he has to get it replaced.”

 

“Damn,” Nishinoya replied. “Between him and Kageyama, we won’t have any setters for a while.”

 

Hinata sat up straight. “What’s going on with Kageyama?”

 

“Nerve damage in his hand and wrist,” Noya said. “He can barely move some of his fingers.”

 

“Oh,” Hinata said. “Kageyama won’t talk to me. He hasn’t spoken to me since the accident.”

 

“What?” Nishinoya was shocked. “Why?”

 

“I have no idea,” Hinata said. “Maybe... Maybe he’s mad at me because I can’t jump anymore.”

 

“I doubt that,” Noya said. “I’ll have Suga talk to him. He listens to Suga.”

 

Hinata sighed. “I guess we can kiss nationals goodbye at this point.”

 

Noya furrowed his eyebrows. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

 

“Well, it’d be one thing if it was just a couple of people out for the rest of the season,” Hinata said. “But pretty much all of us are still recovering. I just don’t think there’s any way we can participate.”

 

The shorter boy slumped over slightly. “Yeah, I guess you’re right.”

 

It was a depressing realization, but it was the truth. It was reality.

 

-

 

Yamaguchi sat on his couch, leg still elevated when there was a knock on the door. His mother came in from the kitchen, peeking out the window before opening it, revealing Tsukishima standing outside.

 

“Come in, Kei,” she said. “I’m glad you’re here. Are you hungry?”

 

“No, ma’am,” Tsukki said. “Thank you.”

 

She retreated back into the kitchen while the blonde boy sat down next to his friend on the couch.

 

“Have you even moved since I was here last?”

 

“Of course,” Yamaguchi said. “How’s your eye?”

 

“Still can’t see.”

 

Yamaguchi grunted in response and they both trained their eyes on the television where some anime neither of them had ever watched before was playing.

 

“How long until you get your cast off?”

 

“A few weeks,” Yamaguchi replied. “I can’t wait to be able to walk again. I can’t imagine what it’s like for Hinata to not be able to walk.”

 

“He’ll figure it out,” Tsukishima said.

 

“You don’t know that,” Yamaguchi said. “It was a serious injury, he could never be back to the way he was bef-“

 

“He will,” Tsukishima said, much firmer this time. “We all will. We’ll all be fine because we have to be. I have to be able to see again.”

 

Yamaguchi was silent for a minute before he placed his hand on that of his friend.

 

“You can overcome this,” he said. “Being blind in one eye isn’t the end of the world. You can adapt to it.”

 

“I tried blocking yesterday,” Tsukishima said. “My coordination is so off I wasn’t able to get more than half of them. I can’t spike for shit, either.”

 

“You can work on it! You can’t just let this determine what you do with your life!”

 

Tsukishima sighed. “I know.”

 

“You’ll practice,” Yamaguchi said. “And you’ll get better. That’s all you can do.”

 

That really was all they could do. Wait and hope for healing.

 

-

 

“How have your bowel movements been?”

 

Tanaka raised his eyebrows at the doctor. “What?”

 

“Have you been.. pooping okay?”

 

Saeko snickered from the chair by the door. Tanaka glared at her before looking back to the doctor.

 

“I am able to shit as much as I please,” he said proudly.

 

The doctor gave him a wary glance before writing what he said down on his clipboard and looking back up at him.

 

“Since you’re symptom free,” the doctor began. “I don’t think I’m going to need to see you again. As soon as you feel any pain, consult with your doctor and they can refer you to me as they see fit. Any questions?”

 

“Nope!”

 

“Then you’re free to-“

 

Tanaka was already jumping off the table and heading out the door. Saeko followed him to the car.

 

“How are your other friends doing?” She asked.

 

“Some of them aren’t doing well,” he said. “But some are doing great. That reminds me, can you take me to Chikara’s house?”

 

Saeko nodded and drove in a different direction, toward the house of the other second year. When they arrived, Tanaka hopped out of the car.

 

“Text me when you’re ready to go home,” she called.

 

He let himself inside and Ennoshita, Kinoshita, and Narita were sitting on the couch, playing video games.

 

“Hey, Ryu!” Ennoshita said. “Come and play.”

 

He grabbed a controller and sat down. “How’s your leg, Hisashi?”

 

“Good,” Kinoshita replied. “I actually get the cast off tomorrow.”

 

“Great,” Tanaka said. “I’m glad that a lot of us are getting better.”

 

“Any word on Daichi?” Narita asked.

 

“Asahi was going to see him today,” Tanaka replied. “I’ll text and ask him.”

 

-

 

Asahi’s phone dinged loudly and he leaned over and grabbed it. He read the message and looked back over to his friend, sitting on the couch with his oxygen tank next to him.

 

“Tanaka wants to know how you are,” he said. “What should I say?”

 

“Tell him I’m doing better,” Daichi said.

 

It wasn’t a lie. There was a complication with his surgery, but he was recovering nicely and would probably be off oxygen soon. He wasn’t doing great, but he was doing well enough.

 

“They’re done!” Suga shouted, emerging from the kitchen and motioning for Asahi to follow him.

 

The other third year did and he put on oven mitts, pulling out a sheet of cookies that Suga insisted he make because “it’ll help us get better.”

 

Suga’s phone rang then and he fumbled it out of his pocket, one arm immobilized by a sling. He answered it and Asahi tried to listen in on the conversation.

 

“Hey, Noya!” Suga exclaimed. “No, Kageyama hasn’t said anything. Why?... Oh. Yeah, I could talk to him... I’ll let you know.”

 

He hung up and Asahi stared for a moment. “What was that about?”

 

“Apparently Kageyama hasn’t spoken to Hinata since the accident,” Suga said. “Hinata thinks he’s mad that he can’t spike anymore. Nishinoya asked me to talk to him.”

 

“I’m sure that’s not the reason,” Asahi said.

 

“Hey!” Daichi shouted from the living room. “Where are those cookies?”

 

Suga rushed in while Asahi put the cookies on a plate.

 

“You shouldn’t be yelling,” Suga scolded. “Don’t put any strain on your lungs.”

 

“Koushi, I don’t even need this oxygen,” Daichi said. “I swear I’m fine. The only reason I’m wearing it is because I know you and my mom will get after me if I don’t.”

 

Suga rolled his eyes and Asahi emerged from the kitchen, carrying the plate of warm chocolate chip cookies.

 

“Will you talk to Kageyama after your surgery tomorrow?” Asahi asked.

 

“If he comes to visit I’ll talk to him,” Suga said. “That reminds me, has anyone really talked to Kageyama?”

 

The others thought, but both shook their heads.

 

“Weird,” Suga said. “I’ll have to ask him what’s going on.”

 

-

 

Suga’s surgery went well. His doctor said it was easy and quick and that within the next six weeks, he should be back to normal.

 

He’d called Kageyama before he went in and said he’d really enjoy a visit from him, but he didn’t expect him to come so soon. Suga had just gotten home when Kageyama came over, a balloon and card that read “get well soon” in his hand.

 

“I’m glad you came,” Suga said. “Come on in.”

 

“You look like you’re doing well,” Kageyama said.

 

“I am,” Suga replied with a smile. “How are you doing?”

 

“I, uh,” Kageyama awkwardly stuttered. “I need a lot of physical therapy for my hand.”

 

“I know you’ll recover fast,” Suga said. “You always exceed expectations. How are things with Hinata?”

 

At that, Kageyama tensed up. “I don’t know.”

 

Suga frowned. “He thinks you’re mad at him. Because he can’t spike anymore.”

 

Kageyama looked up, horrified. “What?! No!” He exclaimed. “That’s-That’s not it at all!”

 

“Then what is it?”

 

“It-It’s...” Kageyama started breathing fast and he looked panicked. “I-I hurt him.”

 

“Whoa, Kageyama,” Suga said. “Calm down. What do you mean?”

 

“I landed on him,” Kageyama said with a wavering voice. “When the crash happened, we were both thrown from the bus and I landed on top of him and that’s probably what hurt him so bad! He probably hates me and I can’t believe I’m the reason he can’t w-walk-“

 

“Kageyama!” The first year looked up at Suga, tears in his eyes. “Talk to him. He’s recovering and he needs the support of his best friend. He’s discouraged and he thinks you hate him. Besides, it’s not your fault we crashed. It was the rain and the unsafe road and you couldn’t have predicted which way you would have been thrown from the bus. I know Hinata will understand.”

 

Kageyama looked at him, pain in his eyes. “I did this to him.”

 

“No, you didn’t. The crash did. The weather did.”

 

“What if he hates me?”

 

“He won’t.”

 

-

 

Kageyama left and went straight to Hinata’s house. He spent a long time standing outside the door, working up the courage to knock on it before he finally did. There was a commotion inside, a voice yelling “mom!” Then, a woman answered the door- an exhausted looking woman with short red hair.

 

“Can I help you?”

 

“I’m- I’m here to see Hin- Er, Shouyou,” Kageyama said, feeling awkward calling Hinata by his given name.

 

“Come in,” the woman said. He followed her down a hallway until she stopped before a door, knocking on it gently. “Shouyou, your friend is here to see you.”

 

Kageyama opened the door and Hinata was laid on a large bed, staring at a TV with a plate of pizza rolls on the bed next to him. His eyes widened.

 

“Kageyama?!” The redhead exclaimed. “H-Hi! I didn’t expect you to-“

 

“I’m sorry,” Kageyama interrupted. “I’m sorry for ignoring you and not coming to visit. I’m... I’m not mad at you. I’m just afraid you’ll be mad at me.”

 

Hinata raised an eyebrow. “What? Why would I be mad at you?”

 

“Because...” Kageyama winced. “I think I’m the reason you were hurt.” Hinata’s expression softened into one of surprise. “I landed on you when we were thrown from the bus and I think I hurt you.”

 

Hinata was silent for a minute before he brought a hand up to his chin. “I guess I sort of remember that,” he said. “I don’t know. I don’t really remember much of the crash at all.”

 

“I’m sorry,” Kageyama said, hating how vulnerable he sounded. “I’m so sorry. I understand if you hate me, or if you never want to spike my tosses again, or-“

 

“I don’t hate you,” Hinata said. “I just... I don’t hate you, I know that. I don’t really know how else I feel. I feel like it doesn’t really matter if you landed on me or not, because either way, it happened and it’s something I have to deal with.” He paused. “Just promise me you won’t leave me again. You promised to stay by my side.”

 

“I promise,” Kageyama replied.

 

“Good,” Hinata said. “Come sit. I was just about to put on My Neighbor Totoro.”

 

Kageyama did so and they watched the movie until dinner time. He stayed until it got dark out and Hinata’s mother drove him home. During that time, Kageyama realized something: they could get through anything as long as they were together, because together-

 

-They were invincible.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> let me know if you want a part 3!! 
> 
> but pls still don’t comment prompts rn i’m trying to get caught up


	10. I Call Bullshit!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cautiously_Dauntless: “Everyone is playing BS, but every time a player gains cards they take a shot“

It was your average Friday night for the Karasuno volleyball team, during which most of them would hang out at Tanaka’s house. This time, though, Nishinoya had an idea.

 

“We should play BS,” he exclaimed.

 

Hinata tilted his head. “What’s BS?”

 

“Basically, we get in a circle and everyone has to put a card down, face down, but it has to be the next number in the deck. If you don’t have that card, you place a card down and lie about it. If someone catches you lying, they call ‘bullshit’ and you have to pick up every card in the pile.”

 

“What happens if someone calls BS and they’re wrong,” Yamaguchi asked.

 

“Then the person who calls BS has to pick up all the cards,” Tanaka piped in. “I have a deck of cards, we should play!”

 

The group got in a circle and began their game. The start was a bit shaky for those who had never played before, but they quickly caught on.

 

“Okay,” Tanaka said. “This is getting boring. I say we spice things up a bit.”

 

He ran from the room and emerged from the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a couple of shot glasses. Daichi stood.

 

“No,” he said. “There are first years here.”

 

“Oh, come on,” Nishinoya whined. “It’ll be fun. Here- Asahi can stay sober to take care of us, hows that sound?”

 

Asahi wore a wary look on his face as he nodded. “I guess this is fine.”

 

Daichi sighed, knowing his protest was useless. “Fine, but don’t say I didn’t warn you.”

 

They went around the circle again.

 

“Two threes,” Kageyama said.

 

“Bullshit!”

 

Everyone looked over to Hinata who had this challenging look on his face. Kageyama stared at him angrily before going in to pick up all of the cards.

 

“You know what you have to do, Kags,” Nishinoya said, handing him a shot glass and pouring the liquor in.

 

Kageyama scowled at his spiker. “How did you know?!”

 

“I didn’t,” Hinata said, shaking with excitement. “I just wanted to take the chance to get you out.”

 

The setter kept the scowl on his face as he downed the shot, wincing at the flavor. Tanaka whooped and Nishinoya hollered.

 

“It’s getting fun, now,” Noya yelled.

 

“Suga, help me out,” Daichi said. “Don’t you think this is a bad idea?”

 

Suga thought. “No, not really. I think this is going to be great.”

 

The look of defeat reappeared on Daichi’s face in full force now.

 

They kept going around the circle and Nishinoya purposefully got himself more cards so he’d have to take a shot. Daichi lost a couple of times and so did Suga, Tsukishima even did. Kageyama and Hinata went at each other practically every round, so they each ended up having to take shot after shot.

 

The only person who hadn’t drank so far was Yamaguchi.

 

“Wait!” Tsukishima said as Yamaguchi put down what he said were two sevens.

 

He eyed the pinch server, seemingly trying to break his resolve. Yamaguchi only stared back, face completely blank save for an unreadable smirk.

 

“What,” Yamaguchi teased. “Are you going to say it?”

 

Tsukki kept staring for another moment. “No,” he decided. “I’m not taking the chance.”

 

They went on to the next person and Tanaka patted Yamaguchi on the back. “How are you so good at this?”

 

The first year only shrugged proudly.

 

They went through a few more rounds before the first year setting-spiking duo was drunk. Kageyama was obviously trying to cover it up, but Hinata had laid down on the floor a while ago.

 

“Hinata,” Daichi said, slightly tipsy, himself. “Your turn.”

 

The spiker pulled himself up and grabbed some cards, throwing them onto the pile. “Five eights,” he slurred.

 

Nishinoya cackled. “Uh, Hinata,” he laughed. “First of all, there are only four eights in a deck.”

 

“Bullshit!” Tanaka screamed, drawing out the word.

 

Hinata groaned and downed another shot, laying down afterwards. “Hey, Kag’yama,” he said. “Whoever pass’ out firs’ loses.”

 

“Idiot,” the setter said. “It’ll be you.”

 

“Hinata, maybe you should take a break,” Suga said.

 

“How are you not drunk at all?” Daichi wondered aloud.

 

Suga shrugged. “Not sure. I totally don’t drink often.” He emphasized the word “totally” and Daichi looked surprised.

 

“No, Suga-san,” Hinata said. “‘M not losin’”

 

“Just admit it,” Kageyama said. “You’re too fucking small to hold your liquor.”

 

“Language,” Daichi scolded.

 

“Seriously?” Tsukishima said. “We’re in a big circle getting drunk underage and you’re worried about our language?”

 

The captain anxiously scratched the back of his neck. “Guys, we need to stop.”

 

“No!” Hinata yelled indignantly. “I’m beating that asshole!”

 

He and Kageyama started drunkenly arguing and Tanaka and Nishinoya were coming after Daichi, trying to convince him to let them keep drinking. Suga was trying to calm everyone down and Tsukishima was pinching the bridge of his nose in annoyance. Asahi was looking at them anxiously, obviously not sure what he should do, but Yamaguchi was sitting there with a smile on his face, obviously proud that he was the only one with his wits about him.

 

Daichi took away their alcohol. There was a lot of whining and protesting, but he wasn’t swayed- though he was physically swaying from the alcohol.

 

Hinata was the first one to pass out and Kageyama was drunkenly yelling at him.

 

“Ha,” the setter said. “I beat you! I told you I would!”

 

He continued to talk to Hinata’s sleeping self until Suga directed him towards the couch to lay down. He passed out almost immediately. Everyone went to sleep sooner or later.

 

According to Daichi, that night was pure bullshit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok this was actually really fun to write lmao  
> requests still closed bc i’m trying to catch up and some people have been waiting very patiently for a long time


	11. Jumbled Words

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> anonymous: “Hinata has dyslexia and was too embarrassed to tell anyone. Only his teachers and his family know. One day while studying with his team member the volleyball club finds out.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> DISCLAIMER: i don’t have dyslexia and while i do have some friends with it, they really don’t make a big deal out of it or anything so like i wasn’t sure how to write this bc i really didn’t know anything about it so this could be absolute shit but at least i tried lmao amirite

Ever since Hinata could remember, he was slower than everyone else. It was hard for him to keep up in school and his grades suffered because of it. He thought he was just stupid, and he hated himself for it. Then, he found out that there was a reason.

 

Hinata was diagnosed with dyslexia when he was in middle school and got certain accommodations during class. At first it was liberating, knowing that there was a reason he was like this, but then it got to be debilitating. He resented his stupid brain and his stupid dyslexia because all of his friends were able to excel at certain subjects, leaving him far behind.

 

When Hinata and his friends would get together to study, they’d laugh at his poor spelling and slow reading. They didn’t know, and he didn’t want them to. He didn’t want them to know he was different, or that it really hurt when they made fun of him.

 

This way of thinking carried on into high school. He made new friends and still, none of them knew about his dyslexia and that was just how he liked it.

 

One day, he was studying with his teammates. He really needed to pass his next Japanese test but it seemed impossible, so the rest of his team decided to help. It was going well- Hinata thought he was doing well- until Tanaka decided to check his paper.

 

He looked at it and after a second, he started laughing.

 

“Dude,” he chuckled. “You’re so bad at spelling. What are you, dyslexic?”

 

The rest of the team let out a quick chuckle and Hinata knew he was joking, he knew he didn’t mean it, but it still hurt and it still made him want to cry because now “dyslexic” was an insult. He was silent and everyone stopped laughing and stared at him, realizing what they had done.

 

“Wait,” Daichi said. “You’re not actually dyslexic, are you?”

 

“I-I-I am,” Hinata spluttered, looking at the ground.

 

“Oh, crap,” Tanaka said. “Dude, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean-“

 

“It’s fine,” Hinata said, feeling his face redden. “I’m just going to... Go to the bathroom.”

 

He stood and ignored the quiet plea for him to stay, retreating into the bathroom and locking the door behind him. He felt tears burn his eyes and let them fall as he sat down on the floor.

 

Before long, there was a knock on the door.

 

“Hinata?” It was Suga. “Are you okay? Can I come in?”

 

He hesitantly stood and opened the door, letting the third year inside. The middle blocker wiped away stray tears.

 

“I’m fine,” he said. “You don’t need to worry.”

 

“I’m sorry if we hurt your feelings,” Suga said. “We didn’t mean to. What we said was really insensitive.”

 

“It’s fine,” Hinata said. “You guys didn’t know.”

 

“Still, we shouldn’t joke about those things- things like this that people can’t control.”

 

Hinata felt another tear fall and wiped it away quickly. “Thank you.”

 

They stood for a second, Suga’s comforting hand on his arm, until Hinata felt he was ready to go back out. There were “sorry”s and looks of regret, but he assured them that he forgave them.

 

They went back to studying and the team was twice as supportive and attentive, giving him exactly what he needed and politely pointing out whatever errors were worth fixing.

 

Maybe opening up about his dyslexia was a good thing. Maybe if he kept doing it, he’d continue to get the help he needed. Plus, his team was nice enough about it, no one made fun of him- not even Kageyama.

 

The next day, Hinata passed the Japanese test.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> also I AM IN COLLEGE and i’m dying so prompts are so hard to fill but here’s what’s coming up next:
> 
> CH 12: guest with a really long but sweet name: “a broadway/musical theatre au where instead of hinata becoming obsessed with volleyball he becomes obsessed with musical theatre. just like his jump hinata has the largest/highest vocal range (this shrimp reaches crazy high notes that everyone else can only dream of reaching) and really good vocal stamina, but he needs to work on his acting and technique.”
> 
> CH 13: Jazpr: “I headcanon Ennoshita to be very close with Yachi, like sleeps-over-at-each-other's-houses-parents-know-each-other kinda close, mainly because they both bond over having what they believe to be unrequited crushes (Yachi with Kiyoko and Ennoshita with Tanaka). Basically, I just want an EnnoYachi friendship with platonic and casual hugging and hand-holding and cheek and head kisses and Karasuno misinterpreting it as romantic. At the end, Ennoshita and Yachi can deny the thoughts of the others and maybe get together with their crushes?”
> 
> CH 14: sunshineshoyo: “hinata gets bullied and is neglected by his parents, which leads to him being depressed and suicidial”
> 
> CH 15: olevaot: “a version of hinata that feels like he needs to be cold and detached (and secretly insecure) as a consequence of living a tragic life, and kageyama being way softer and welcoming as opposed to him”
> 
> PLEASE be patient with me :)  
> requests are still closed lol


	12. Not Throwing Away My Shot

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> guest with a really long but sweet name: “a broadway/musical theatre au where instead of hinata becoming obsessed with volleyball he becomes obsessed with musical theatre. just like his jump hinata has the largest/highest vocal range (this shrimp reaches crazy high notes that everyone else can only dream of reaching) and really good vocal stamina, but he needs to work on his acting and technique.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> two weeks of my hiatus was spent writing this. i’m a big fan of musical theatre and i loved making this for you guys :)  
> I STRONGLY ENCOURAGE YOU TO LISTEN TO THE SONGS THAT ARE MENTIONED IN THE STORY

“B-Before my eyes, it blocks my path. A high, high wall; what sort of scene is on the other side? What-What will I be able to see there? ‘The View from the Top;’ A scenery that I will never see on my own; but, if I'm not alone, then... I might be able to see it.”

 

“Great monologue!” Hinata looked up and saw the drama program’s director, Ukai, a blond man with long hair, smiling at him. “Your acting could use a bit of work, but there’s potential there. How about you give us a preview of your vocal range?”

 

Hinata looked on either side of him, to where the other boys who were trying out stood, some snickering at his poor acting skills- the director definitely sugar coated it. His voice was totally robotic and he knew it. He’d never get casted for any lead roles at this rate.

 

Nervously, Hinata went to his go-to song: Goodnight My Someone from the Music Man. This needed to be perfect.

 

He cleared his throat and took a deep breath, glancing to the boy on piano to start.

 

“Goodnight, my someone, goodnight, my love,” he sang. “Sleep tight, my someone, sleep tight, my love. Our star is shining its brightest light, for goodnight, my love, for goodnight.”

 

He continued on with the song until he finished the next verse and then nervously looked back to the director. The man looked surprised, to say the least.

 

“Well-Well give him a round of applause,” he shouted.

 

Scattered applause from the other boys followed and Hinata bowed warily.

 

The other boys did their tryouts and they were good. They were so good at acting and singing and Hinata was so bad and he just knew he wasn’t going to get in. Every one of the boys left the auditorium and Hinata could tell they were all just as nervous as he was.

 

“Hey!”

 

Hinata stopped in his tracks and turned around. There he stood: Kageyama Tobio, King of the Stage, in all of his self proclaimed glory. His tryout had been impressive, his vocal runs were phenomenal and his acting was something else. Hinata felt himself sweat.

 

“Why’s your acting so shitty,” Kageyama asked. “What the hell have you been doing these past three years?”

 

“Why- Why’s your attitude so shitty?” Hinata spluttered.

 

“That doesn’t answer my question,” Kageyama said stepping forward. “If you ever made an actual effort you’d be great, but right now you suck. I don’t think your voice will be able to save you.”

 

Hinata opened his mouth to retort but was interrupted by a boy with ashen grey hair standing between them.

 

“Calm down, boys,” he said. “None of us are guaranteed a spot.” He held out his hand to Kageyama. “I’m Sugawara Koshi,” he said, shaking the younger boys hand and then shaking Hinata’s. “Try not to piss off the competition,” he said to both boys. “It won’t get you anywhere.”

 

The two first years stared at each other for another minute or so before giving up, going their own ways. Hinata went and joined Nishinoya- the first person to introduce himself to Hinata on the first day- in talking to the other second years. They stopped talking when he joined them.

 

“Hey!” Noya beamed. “Dude, your voice is amazing! Why didn’t you tell me you could sing like that?”

 

Hinata felt his cheeks redden. “Th-Thank you, you guys were great, too!”

 

The banter continued until people began to leave. Hinata was one of the last ones to go because he wanted to talk to as many people as possible. It was late when he finally got home, but he couldn’t wait until morning when he’d find out what role he got. It hadn’t even been revealed what exactly they were doing- which was strange, and unlike any drama program Hinata had ever participated in.

 

The next morning everyone showed up at the auditorium eager to find out what they were doing.

 

“This summer,” Ukai began. “We’re doing an assortment of different things. I will take different songs from different productions and assign them to you and it will be called Karasuno’s Musical Medley.”

 

He plastered a paper on the wall and then handed each boy their own copy. To open, they’d all perform Hello from Book of Mormon- Nishinoya as Elder Cunningham and, of course, Kageyama as Elder Price. Shocker.

 

The first years would next perform All That’s Known from Spring Awakening, Kageyama as Melchior- lead role, again.

 

Next would be Yorktown from the musical Hamilton, performed by the second and third year members with Tanaka as Alexander Hamilton, Sugawara as Lafayette, Asahi as Hercules Mulligan, Nishinoya as John Laurens, and Daichi as George Washington, the remaining second years as the entourage.

 

Next was Tsukishima leading in Freeze Your Brian- the blond boy was so stoic and silently judging everyone, Hinata was excited to see him actually make an effort.He’d be accompanied by Yamaguchi.

 

Then he looked to the one that came after that. It was the song Only Us from Dear Evan Hansen, and Zoe’s male counterpart would be played by... Him! Hinata’s name was there! And Evan Hansen would be-

 

“What?!”

 

He and Kageyama exclaimed the same thing at the same time and stared at each other in horror for a second.

 

“I am NOT singing that song with him,” Kageyama said.

 

Hinata was kind of insulted at first, but proceeded to back him up. “I’m not either!”

 

Ukai gave them a bored look. “Too bad. You’re going on that stage whether you like it or not. If you guys blow this, you’ll be removed from the club, so I suggest you make an effort.”

 

Hinata scrunched his nose and gave Kageyama a glare that was returned with equal intensity before looking back at the paper.

 

There were a few songs that he wasn’t in. Hamilton’s Guns and Ships, Suga returning as Lafayette. Noya returning as Elder Cunningham in Book of Mormon’s Man Up.

 

The last song, which Ukai stressed to him needed to be a big finale, was Hinata leading as Janis in I’d Rather Be Me from Mean Girls. The fact that he had a solo song, a lead role, made his heart flutter.

 

“I expect effort,” Ukai said. “No complaining. Let’s get to work.”

 

-

 

Days passed and Hinata hated working with Kageyama. He was so self righteous and it made Hinata want to rip his hair out. When it came to working on their song, he was being impossible.

 

“You’re pitchy,” Kageyama complained. “Do you not know how to harmonize?”

 

Hinata growled. “I do! Your voice is just all over the place! This is a duet, you can’t pretend like you’re the lead when you’re just not!”

 

Kageyama started to retort but Ukai interrupted.

 

“You boys have got to get it together,” he scolded. “Or you’re out. Got it?”

 

They both gulped. “Yes, sir.”

 

“Now try again.”

 

The piano started and Hinata stared at Kageyama.

 

“I don’t need you to sell me on reasons to want you. I don’t need you to search for the proof that I should. You don’t have to convince me, you don’t have to be sca-“

 

“Stop!”

 

The boys looked over at Ukai, who stood with his hands on his hips.

 

“You sound great, but you need to actually pretend to like him.”

 

“I don’t know-“

 

“It’s like this,” Kageyama said. “Play my part.”

 

The piano started again and Kageyama took his hands, staring into his eyes with a look that was pure, innocent. Hinata started to melt.

 

“I never thought there’d be someone like you who would want me,” Kageyama sang. “So I gave you ten thousand reasons to not let me go.”

 

He continued and Hinata felt himself start to smile. When he stopped, the look of resentment situated back on his face and Hinata felt himself deflate.

 

“That’s it,” Kageyama said. “Pretty convincing, huh?”

 

Hinata blushed. “Pfft... No!”

 

Kageyama scoffed. “You try.”

 

Okay, so all Hinata had to do was return the look Kageyama gave him. Easy.

 

The piano started.

 

“I don’t need you to sell me on reasons to-“

 

“You look constipated,” Kageyama said.

 

Hinata scowled. “I’m working on it!”

 

They did. They worked on it and worked on it and Hinata still couldn’t get it no matter what he did. When he sang to Kageyama he just felt awkward and nervous and he couldn’t force that soft look on his face. His hands were sweaty and his heart was fluttery and his stomach did flips and-

 

Shit.

 

He couldn’t be falling for Kageyama. No, he definitely wasn’t. He didn’t mean the words he was singing and he didn’t want Kageyama to mean them back.

 

Right?

 

-

 

Time went on and Hinata began to fear that he was wrong. Opening night was getting closer and closer and Hinata didn’t feel ready. He didn’t have enough feeling to put behind the words in either songs. He wasn’t confident enough.

 

So now as they stood behind the curtain ready to go on for the first song, Hinata kept nervously fidgeting with the name tag that read Elder White on it.

 

“Hello” went well. Kageyama slayed that lead role and even Hinata had to admit it- reluctantly so. They went back on for “All That’s Known” and Hinata knew he butchered the Latin that he needed to chant.

 

“Yorktown” was phenomenal. Hinata felt like he’d never in a million years be as good as Tanaka or Daichi. When “Freeze Your Brain” started, Hinata felt his anxiety worsen.

 

He wasn’t ready, he wasn’t ready at all. His breath was coming out raggedly and he needed to get out of here-

 

“Dude, calm down.”

 

Hinata turned when a hand planted itself on his shoulder and saw Kageyama staring at him with a look that was gentler than normal.

 

“You’ll do great. I know I act like a jerk all the time, but you’re not as bad as you think.”

 

Hinata felt his chest loosen and he took a deep breath.

 

“Let’s go,” the ginger said.

 

They went out onto that stage and Hinata stared at Kageyama as the piano started. He stared deep into those blue eyes and felt himself get lost.

 

This was the feeling he needed. The genuine feeling- the

 

LOVE.

 

“I don’t need you to sell me on reasons to want you.”

 

Boy, was that true.

 

“You don’t have to convince me, you don’t have to be scared you’re not enough.”

 

Kageyama was plenty.

 

“So what if it’s us, what if it’s us, and only us,

And what came before won’t count anymore or matter.

Can we try that?”

 

When Kageyama replied, it seemed more heartfelt than usual. It felt real.

 

“I never thought there’d be someone like you who would want me, so I gave you ten thousand reasons to not let me go.”

 

Then, they joined together.

 

“It’s not so impossible

Nobody else but the two of us here.

Cause you’re saying it’s possible

We can just watch the whole world disappear.”

 

The rest of the world really did fall away. The audience, the stage, everything was gone.

 

“And it’s only us.”

 

They finished the song strong and Kageyama was looking down at him with this smile, this small but heartfelt smile and Hinata knew that he felt the same, he just knew it.

 

They exited stage left and when they got there, Kageyama pulled him into a dressing room.

 

“I-“ Hinata began, about to confess his undying love, but Kageyama had other plans.

 

He went straight in for a kiss and literally swooping him off his feet. Hinata kissed him back because everything, all of the rehearsing, all of the fighting, had led to this moment. For that moment, everything was perfect.

 

Kageyama pulled away first and Hinata almost whined.

 

“I told you you would do fine,” he said.

 

Hinata laughed and there was a knock on the door, making him jump as Kageyama opened it. Nishinoya stood outside with a smirk on his face.

 

“I just need my name tag,” he said.

 

Kageyama found it and handed it to him. Noya left, but not before looking at Hinata and winking.

 

“Let’s go,” Kageyama said. “I want to see the rest of the show.”

 

Hinata smiled and nodded, following Kageyama’s lead until they parted ways, Hinata joining where Noya was doing his warm ups.

 

“So,” Nishinoya said. “What were you guys doing in there?”

 

“Just...” Hinata blushed. “Talking.”

 

“Mm-hmm,” Noya hummed. “Sure.”

 

They continued to watch the show. Ukai approached Hinata while Noya was finishing up his song, making sure he was ready and dressed and warmed up. As he prepared himself to take the stage, he heard talking.

 

“Why’d he get the lead in the finale?” Tsukishima asked.

 

“Honestly, I don’t know.” Was that... Kageyama? “I couldn’t tell you. I deserve that role- not him.”

 

He must’ve thought Hinata wasn’t listening, but he was. The redhead looked over to Kageyama and gave him a glare. So much for him being nice.

 

Kageyama seemed to realize what he did. “Hinata-“

 

He turned away and strode out onto the stage.

 

He was confident.

 

The music began.

 

“So your best friend screwed you over, acted nice when she not nice.”

 

He sent a glance to Kageyama.

 

“Well I have some advice,

Cause it’s happened to me- twice!

Here’s my secret strategy, it always works because

The world doesn’t end, it just feels like it does.”

 

“So raise your right finger,” he said, making sure to glance at Kageyama as he raised his middle finger to the sky. “And solemnly swear: whatever they say about me, I don’t care.”

 

He went on with the song bitterly, feeling the anger coursing through his veins.

 

This was a finale people were going to remember.

 

“I’d rather be me than be with you,” he sang, over and over again.

 

He hit those last notes like his life depended on it, feeling a release when he finished the song. He breathed deeply as the crowd stood and applauded him. Normally, Hinata would be beaming with happiness, but now he almost didn’t care.

 

The anger had passed.

 

He wanted to cry.

 

-

 

The show ended. Hinata was the first one to pack up his things and leave. As he was walking out the door, he felt a hand grab his arm.

 

“Hinata,” Kageyama said. “Wait, please.”

 

“Why?” He asked. “So you can lie to me again? No thanks.”

 

He took off, ignoring Kageyama’s heartbroken face staring at his back.

 

-

 

The next morning, Hinata got to the auditorium early, like usual, so it was no shock that nobody was there. At least, that’s what he thought.

 

When he opened the doors, sitting on the stage was none other than Kageyama Tobio, holding his guitar. Hinata stopped in his tracks and almost left before he started playing.

 

“He said, there’s nothing like your smile,

Sort of subtle, and perfect, and real.

He said, you never knew how wonderful that smile could make someone feel.

 

He knew, whenever you get bored you scribble stars on the cuffs of your jeans.

And he noticed that you still fill out the quizzes that they put in those teen magazines.”

 

The chords changed.

 

“Boy, you got me helpless,

Look into your eyes and the sky’s the limit

I’m helpless.

Down for the count and I’m drowning in ‘em.”

 

It changed again.

 

“Don’t stop looking in my eyes,

Can’t we be seventeen?

Is that so hard to do?

If you could let me in, I could be good with you.

Let us be seventeen,

If we’ve still got the right.

So what’s it gonna be?

I wanna be with you, wanna be with you, tonight.”

 

Another change.

 

“See we still keep talking after you’re gone,

You’re still with me then, feels so good in my arms.

They say you go blind

Maybe it’s true.

We’ve all got our junk, and my junk is you.”

 

The guitar stopped altogether and Kageyama looked at him with sad eyes.

 

“So what if it’s us? What if it’s us, and only us?

And what came before won’t count anymore or matter.

Can we try that?

What if it’s you, and what if it’s me,

And what if that’s all that we need it to be,

And the rest of the world falls away?”

 

“What do you say?”

 

Hinata was silent. Kageyama put down his guitar and hopped off the stage, walking towards him.

 

“I’m sorry for what I said,” he said. “I didn’t mean it, any of it. I just got really jealous. Y’know, the finale is the part of the show that everyone remembers most, and I wanted it to be me they remembered, not anyone else. I mean, if it wasn’t me, I’m glad it was you, tho-“

 

Hinata took one big step forward and pulled him down by the collar, connecting their lips.

 

“I forgive you,” he said when he pulled away. “But we need to work on that ego of yours.”

 

Kageyama smiled and hugged him and out from backstage emerged the rest of the drama club, whooping and clapping, followed by Ukai, who was muttering something about “teenagers these days.”

 

“Alright,” the director said. “We have more shows to prepare for! Let’s get moving!”

 

Kageyama sealed his apology with one last kiss to the forehead.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i promise i’ll open requests soon guys i’m so sorry


	13. Wallflowers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jazpr: “I headcanon Ennoshita to be very close with Yachi, like sleeps-over-at-each-other's-houses-parents-know-each-other kinda close, mainly because they both bond over having what they believe to be unrequited crushes (Yachi with Kiyoko and Ennoshita with Tanaka). Basically, I just want an EnnoYachi friendship with platonic and casual hugging and hand-holding and cheek and head kisses and Karasuno misinterpreting it as romantic. At the end, Ennoshita and Yachi can deny the thoughts of the others and maybe get together with their crushes?”

Yachi and Ennoshita were best friends for as long as they could remember. Before volleyball, before Karasuno, before middle school.

 

They were the kind of kids that spent so much time together, they might as well have been related. Their moms were best friends in high school- maids of honor in each other’s weddings. Yachi and Ennoshita grew up together, took baths together as babies, went on vacation together, slept over at each other’s houses.

 

They never imagined thinking of their relationship as anything but platonic. The thought never even occurred to either of them. They had sleepovers every weekend and their parents didn’t care about them sleeping in the same bed, so they did. No one cared, they were like siblings.

 

Besides, they were both incredibly gay.

 

Yachi was the only one who knew about Ennoshita’s love life- or lack thereof. She watched his developing crush grow on a certain team member and she was able to notice it long before Ennoshita did.

 

When he did notice, his life might as well have ended.

 

“Do you think he likes me?”

 

Ennoshita now lay on Yachi’s bed, droning on as she struggled to focus on her homework.

 

“I mean, I’ve already known him for a year, so he probably does, but as a friend. What if he’s not even gay? What if-“

 

“Oh, my God,” Yachi said, turning away from her desk. “Chikara, I don’t know what goes on inside Tanaka’s head! Now come and help me factor this equation.”

 

The boy stood up and leaned over her desk. “It’s non-factorable,” he said. “You need to use the quadratic formu-“

 

“No,” Yachi groaned, sitting back in her chair.

 

Ennoshita only chuckled and laid back down on her bed, staring at the ceiling.

 

Was this ever going to end?

 

-

 

The answer was no. It only got worse for the both of them.

 

As it turns out, Yachi was a hopeless romantic, herself.

 

“Oh, no,” she said one day while the two of them were watching a movie.

 

Ennoshita looked at her worriedly. “What?”

 

She stared. “I think I’m in love with a senior.”

 

The second year sighed. “We talked about this. Seniors only want to get in your pants.”

 

Yachi raised an eyebrow. “It’s Shimizu.”

 

Ennoshita’s eyes widened. “Her? Oh, well she’s a completely different story.”

 

“I know,” she whined. “That’s my problem.”

 

“What made you think of this just now?”

 

“I don’t know!” She said frantically. “It just came into my head!”

 

He chuckled. “Alright then.”

 

He kissed the side of her head and they went on to watching the movie, Yachi snuggled into Ennoshita’s side.

 

-

 

Suga and Daichi were standing by the bench, overseeing their team that was filing in throughout the morning.

 

What caught their eye was two of their friends walking in, holding hands and laughing affectionately. When they got inside, Ennoshita wrapped an arm around Yachi and squeezed her quickly, kissing the top of her head before they went their separate ways.

 

Daichi looked at his co-captain. “Did you see-“

 

“Yeah,” Suga replied. “I wonder how long that’s been going on for?”

 

“I have no idea,” Shimizu chimed in, walking up from behind them.

 

Across the gym, Hinata and Kageyama saw them coming in while stretching. At their affectionate exchange, they stopped their nonsensical bickering and exchanged a shocked glance.

 

“What was that?!” Hinata asked nobody in particular.

 

“How am I supposed to know?!” Kageyama shot back.

 

Hinata stood suddenly. “We need to protect our Townsperson B,” he said, cracking his knuckles. “I’ll go over there and show him a piece-“

 

“Whoa there,” Nishinoya said, walking up with Tanaka and placing a hand on Hinata’s shoulder. “What’s got you all worked up?”

 

“Yachi and Ennoshita-senpai are dating!”

 

Noya seemed taken aback, but laughed it off. “Are you sure? I didn’t think they’d be-“

 

“He kissed her head when they came in,” Kageyama said.

 

Noya stopped laughing. “Seriously? Ryu!” He elbowed Tanaka in the gut. “Did you know anything about that?”

 

Tanaka looked a bit weary for a second, but put on his normal eccentric air less than a second later.

 

“No, I didn’t,” he said with a hearty laugh. “Good for them!”

 

He walked off and Noya turned back to his underclassmen.

 

“What’s up with him?” Hinata asked.

 

Nishinoya only shrugged.

 

-

 

It was lunchtime and Yachi sat with the other first years, like she always did. This time, though, their freak duo gave her an awkward, constipated stare as she walked towards them.

 

“Um, hi?” Yachi raised an eyebrow.

 

“You know,” Hinata began. “If En- Ouch!” Kageyama elbowed him in the ribs. “If a guy ever hurts you, just tell us. We’ll fight him.”

 

“Uhm, thanks,” Yachi said. “But I don’t think you’ll have to worry about that.”

 

Hinata grumbled something that Yachi couldn’t quite make out, but she just shrugged it off.

 

-

 

Ennoshita sat down with some of the second years at their lunch period. He got a sort of suspicious glance from each of them.

 

“Where’s Tanaka?” Ennoshita asked.

 

They looked around, responding with shrugs.

 

“I have a question for you,” Nishinoya said. “Anything you want to tell us? Maybe about you and a special someone?”

 

Ennoshita laughed. “What?”

 

“Oh, come on,” the libero said. “You know...”

 

“No,” Ennoshita responded. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

 

Noya shrugged. “Whatever.”

 

-

 

On her way to practice, Yachi was stuck in thought. Why was everyone acting so weird? Also, why was Hinata so insistent about protecting her from guys? Why now, of all times?

 

“Hitoka.”

 

Yachi jumped and turned around at the sound of her given name. Shimizu stood behind her, waving gently. Yachi’s hands started to sweat.

 

“Ah, Shimizu!” She exclaimed.

 

The girl smiled. “Call me Kiyoko. Can I walk with you?”

 

“O-Of course!”

 

They walked in silence for a minute before Kiyoko spoke again.

 

“So,” she began. “You and Ennoshita, huh?”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“I mean how long have you two been together?”

 

Yachi stopped walking. “What?!”

 

“You are together, aren’t you?”

 

“No! No, no. We’re just friends!”

 

Kiyoko raised her eyebrows. “Are you sure? You seem to like him a lot-“

 

“I like you!”

 

There was a moment of silence where Yachi was sure she was actually going to die. Or something like that. She felt weak at the knees and her lungs were squeezing extra tight.

 

“I-I...” She couldn’t get any more words out.

 

“It’s okay,” Kiyoko said, stepping towards her with the most sincere smile Yachi had ever seen her wear. She tucked Yachi’s hair behind her ear. “It’s okay.”

 

Then, their lips touched. It was the most magical feeling Yachi had ever felt.

 

She wanted this to last forever.

 

-

 

Ennoshita was under the impression that he was the first one to the club room, until he walked inside. Tanaka was sitting, tying his shoes, alone.

 

“Hey,” he said when Ennoshita walked in. “What’s going on?”

 

“Nothing,” Ennoshita replied, setting down his bag.

 

“How’re things with your girlfriend?”

 

Ennoshita stared. “Excuse me?”

 

“You know, Yachi,” Tanaka said, confused.

 

Ennoshita just laughed. “Yeah, right!” He exclaimed. “Dude, she’s like my sister! I wouldn’t date her!”

 

Tanaka stood. “Oh, thank Jesus.”

 

Ennoshita stopped laughing. “What?”

 

Tanaka looked anxious. “I, uh, I didn’t mean... Well, I guess I... Uh...”

 

“Do you...?” Ennoshita didn’t want to finish the sentence. What if he was wrong?

 

“Ah, I do... Do you?”

 

Ennoshita smiled. “Like you? Yes.”

 

“Fuck yeah!”

 

Tanaka exclaimed, tackling him.

 

He pressed their lips together.

 

Ennoshita was satisfied.

 

-

 

On the way home, Yachi turned to her best friend just as he turned to her and they both spoke at the same time.

 

“You’ll never guess what happened today!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi guys. updates will be slow. a lot of things are happening at home and i’m just too dead to write. everything is falling apart and writing is sadly the last thing on my mind. i have some stuff pre written but once i run out i might have to go on a hiatus. please don’t comment any prompts or requests. thank you for understanding.


	14. Until the Sirens Sound I’m Safe

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> TheRealKags (yes, me, bitch): “Hinata has severe anxiety, rekindled by a tough situation going on at home. Depersonalization is scary, but good friends make it easier.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> an explanation, of sorts.

“Alright boys! Get over here!”

 

Hinata followed Kageyama over to the circle that their team was forming around their coach. Hopefully this would be what he thought it was.

 

“We have a training camp coming up in Tokyo,” he said.

 

The spiker internally screamed. Something about training camps made him positively vibrate with energy.

 

“Here are your permission slips,” the coach continued. “Have them turned in as soon as possible along with your payment.”

 

Hinata felt his stomach sink. “Payment?”

 

“Of course,” Ukai said. “Your school isn’t rich, they can’t sponsor every single trip we take. They’re paying for gas, but you boys need to help pay for food and lodging. Any other questions?”

 

Hinata tuned out everything else. This had never really been a problem for him until now. Just recently his world turned upside down. His step dad was not only exposed as someone who’d been cheating on Hinata’s mother, but he also lost his job. His mom couldn’t work because she was sick, so they were not only a broken family, but they were a broke one as well.

 

How was he going to pay for this training camp? They only had just enough money for food, and that was a stretch at this point. Hinata already had to give up driving school for the time being because his mom told him she couldn’t pay for it. What was he supposed to do?

 

Suddenly his body didn’t feel like his. He’d been getting this feeling a lot lately and he didn’t know what it was. His hands didn’t feel like his hands and his voice didn’t sound like his voice. Were his feet really touching the floor at all? Hinata didn’t like this feeling. A feeling of numbness with a thin but ever present blanket of fear.

 

“Hey. Hinata!” Kageyama’s hand was on his shoulder and the area where they made contact tingled. “You ready to practice?”

 

Now Kageyama was expecting an answer. Think of something ‘Hinata’ would say, if he ever truly existed.

 

“Sure.”

 

He wasn’t sure how convincing it was, but he didn’t care. He felt like weights were attached to his shoes while he walked with his setter to the area of the gym where they belonged and he couldn’t imagine jumping at this point. When the time was right, he tried to run and jump but he was barely hitting the top of the net. Kageyama gave him a glare.

 

“What’s your issue?”

 

“Nothing.”

 

Hinata’s depth perception was off. The floor seemed too far away and when he jumped next, he ended up jumping right into the net. Kageyama scolded him again and he just wanted to cry now. All this time the thing he couldn’t get out of his mind was how the hell is he going to pay for this training camp?

 

“I said,” Kageyama’s voice pushed through his thoughts. “What’s up with you today?”

 

“I-I...” Hinata couldn’t get any other words out around the lump that blocked his entire throat.

 

Kageyama sighed and grabbed Hinata’s arm. Once again, the touch tingled and it was the only thing letting Hinata know that he wasn’t dreaming. Kageyama pulled him outside, exchanging terse words with their captain and their coach that Hinata couldn’t make out.

 

When they were outside, Kageyama spoke.

 

“What’s going on with you?” His voice was missing the anger that it normally held.

 

Hinata opened his mouth and no sound came out. Kageyama’s voice sounded so far away and the redhead wasn’t even sure he was really awake anymore. It felt like every second he was harshly jolted awake from a dream over and over again.

 

“Hey,” Kageyama said, firm but soft all at the same time. “Just tell me what’s wrong.”

 

“I don’t feel good.”

 

It wasn’t very specific, but it wasn’t a lie. Hinata didn’t feel good. He didn’t know what was wrong. He didn’t know what this feeling was, but he didn’t like it. It wasn’t a good feeling.

 

“Okay,” Kageyama said. “What do you want me to do?”

 

“Can you...” Hinata hesitated. “Hug me?”

 

Kageyama looked taken aback at first, but Hinata didn’t care. He needed someone to touch him.

 

“Please?” Hinata’s voice shook.

 

“Uh... Okay?”

 

Kageyama awkwardly moved in to wrap his arms around Hinata’s numb body and suddenly his entire being tingled with feeling. He pressed himself further into Kageyama’s chest. The tingle gradually gave way to something more, an actual feeling of human contact. The constricting feeling in Hinata’s chest slowly began to release and the lump in his throat grew smaller. When he released Kageyama from the hug, he didn’t feel completely better, but his vision was less blurry and his hands were less shaky.

 

“You good?”

 

Hinata sighed. “I can’t pay for training camp.”

 

Kageyama hid any disappointment that would otherwise be shown on his face. “What do you mean? It’s really not that much.”

 

“My... My step dad lost his job,” Hinata said. “My mom said we can’t spend money on anything extra. We’re already looking for new places to live in case we lose the house. We might end up living in a trailer.”

 

Kageyama’s eyes were now wide. “Oh. I’m... I’m sorry. Why don’t we talk to coach about it? I’m sure he can work something out with you. He really wants us all there.”

 

Hinata shrugged. “I guess.”

 

The redhead waited while his setter approached the door, opening it and beckoning their coach to come outside. Suddenly Hinata felt dizzy again and everything felt too far away. He stuck out his hand for Kageyama to come back to him and the other boy stared at him for a second, hesitant, but gave in and eventually stood next to him. Kageyama wrapped an arm around him and rubbed his thumb continuously against his shoulder blade.

 

Hinata briefly explained his situation to the coach and the man stared at him intently, nodding in acknowledgment every so often.

 

“How about I give you a... Scholarship,” the coach said.

 

The boys looked at him, confused. “What?” Hinata asked.

 

“You’re my player, and you excel at volleyball, so I’ll give you a full scholarship to the camp. How’s that sound?”

 

“So... You’ll pay for it? You don’t have to-“

 

“It’s a scholarship,” Ukai said. “That means you earned it. Okay? I’ll take care of everything.”

 

With that the coach patted his head and turned on his heel, walking back into the gym. Kageyama turned to face him.

 

“I told you it would work out,” he said.

 

“I don’t want him to spend money on me,” Hinata whispered. “Not just because he feels bad.”

 

“It’s a scholarship,” Kageyama reiterated. “That means you deserve it. He’s not doing it out of pity. Just take what he’s giving you and be thankful and play well.”

 

Kageyama let go of the shoulder he was still massaging and held the door open, motioning for Hinata to go inside. He did.

 

Play well. That’s all he had to do. He wasn’t in imminent danger, even though it felt like it sometimes. He wasn’t going to die today, even though it felt like he was going to die inside whenever he went home to his mother’s depressed air and the mostly empty house where Hinata knew he should start packing for when they inevitably have to move. He was fine, even when he was alone with his angry and terrified thoughts for so long that they kept him awake at all hours of the night, and kept him so nauseous that he couldn’t bring himself to eat.

 

Everything was fine. In this moment, the world wasn’t ending. The sirens going off in Hinata’s brain weren’t real and even though he knew he wasn’t strong enough to shut them off completely, he just had to remember that he was safe.

 

He was safe.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> good news: i think i’m back and requests are back open! comment your prompts below :)


	15. See You Tomorrow

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> sunshineshoyo: “hinata gets bullied and is neglected by his parents, which leads to him being depressed and suicidial”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i was in my feels when i wrote this so it could be complete trash

Hinata’s eyes opened. Another day.

 

He turned off his alarm and got out of bed, wanting to cry when he felt the cool air against his legs. He got ready for school and walked out the door, past his parents room and past Natsu’s room.

 

Natsu. Their favorite child.

 

Honestly, Natsu would be Hinata’s favorite, if he was a parent. She was low maintenance and she was smart and she was beautiful- she was the perfect child.

 

Hinata was annoying and needy and ugly and a horrible student.

 

His parents never outright said this to him, but he didn’t need them to. He heard it enough as it was- between the voice in his head and the people at school.

 

When he got to Karasuno High School, Hinata tried to move quickly and quietly towards the gym, but it was no use. Three members of the basketball team soon cornered him.

 

“Hey, buddy,” one of them said, throwing an arm around him in some mockery of friendship. “You ready to play volleyball with your gay friends?”

 

He said nothing.

 

“What’s wrong?” Another boy said. “Too afraid to admit that we’re right? That you and your friends are a bunch of fags?”

 

“He’s so small, I bet he’s secretly a girl,” the third boy said. He grabbed Hinata and shoved him against the wall of the school, pinning him there. “Why don’t we check?”

 

They all came in to grab him and that was when Hinata decided to scream. He started to kick and yell and punch and fight until he heard a booming voice that carried above his own.

 

“Hey!”

 

Each of the boys froze, hands restraining both of Hinata’s arms and grabbing for his pants. Everyone involved was now staring at none other than Kageyama Tobio.

 

“Get out of here before I get the rest of the ‘gays’ to come and fucking kill you.”

 

Slowly, each of the hands released Hinata, but a voice whispered in his ear.

 

“Next time, no one will be here to help you.”

 

He was left with Kageyama, thanking whatever gods might exist that those boys left. Kageyama turned to him.

 

“Since when have those assholes been getting physical with you?”

 

Kageyama knew about the bullying. He and the other first years knew, because it was hard to hide when those boysdidn’t try very hard to conceal their outward hatred of their targeted victim. The only thing they weren’t aware of was the physical violence.

 

“They won’t be doing it again,” Hinata lied. He knew they would.

 

“Good,” Kageyama said. “Come on.”

 

They went to the club room and changed, Hinata changing as quickly as possible because he did not under any circumstances want Kageyama to see the bruising on his ribs.

 

Practice came and went. Hinata willed himself to smile and to keep going all throughout the day, even though the teasing and the shoving made his resolve waver. He was tired. Physically and emotionally.

 

When the time came, Hinata was on his way to practice again.

 

Alone.

 

That was a big mistake.

 

“Hey shortie!”

 

Hinata froze and then turned around, staring down those boys from the basketball team. He stared at the ground.

 

“What?” One said. “Scared? You know, I think now’s a good time to finish what we started this morning.”

 

The ginger gulped. “Just-Just let me go to practice,” he said. “Please?”

 

“I don’t think so.”

 

They all surged forward and Hinata began to fight. He fought harder than he’d ever fought before because they were trying to undress him, right there behind the gym, in public. This was where he was drawing the line.

 

“Help!” Hinata shouted. “He-“

 

A fist slammed into his nose and he felt the blood start rushing down his face.

 

The boys got his pants off, but left his underwear on. They laughed and taunted and threw his pants out of the way, continuing to beat on him.

 

He was scared.

 

He couldn’t move.

 

He hoped they killed him.

 

They didn’t.

 

When they were satisfied, they stood back and admired their work- the bloody, broken, crying redhead lying on the ground.

 

“I guess it’s a boy,” one of them said.

 

The other two laughed and the three of them walked away.

 

Hinata moves, eventually. He forced himself up and crawled over to his pants, pulling them on and standing on wobbly legs.

 

He couldn’t go to practice. Not now. Not like this.

 

Hinata went home. He’d had enough. He absolutely couldn’t take it anymore.

 

He walked through the front door. His mother was grabbing her purse and walking out the door, giving him a glance before going on her way.

 

Hinata chuckled.

 

He was alone. Completely alone.

 

He grabbed his phone and texted the team’s group chat.

 

“Goodbye. I can’t do it anymore.”

 

It was kind of cruel, really. He truly didn’t care anymore, especially since no one else seemed to, either. The text was a test, of sorts. At first, he wanted to wait a moment to see what kind of response he got, but he didn’t care.

 

Not when he set his phone down.

 

Not when he walked into the bathroom and stared in the mirror.

 

Not when he heard notifications going off.

 

Not when he studied his reflection, his pale face and his broken nose.

 

Pathetic.

 

Hinata reached over to his phone and looked at the messages flooding in.

 

“What?”

 

“Hinata, are you okay?”

 

“Where are you?”

 

“He’s probably at home.”

 

“Don’t do anything.”

 

“We’re on our way.”

 

No. No, no, no. He had to be quick. There wasn’t much time now.

 

He had two options: razor, or pills. He figured the razor would be more definitive, but the pills would hurt less.

 

Pills.

 

A pathetic choice, once again.

 

He heard his front door open. He’d spent too much time staring at his terrible reflection. He grasped the first bottle he found and fiddled with the cap, trying to open it.

 

“Hinata!” He heard them shouting his name. “Split up,” he heard Daichi say.

 

Come on, get the damn cap off! His hands were shaking too hard and he could hear them coming up the stairs.

 

Just as the cap slipped off, Nishinoya came into view in the doorway of the bathroom.

 

“Shouyou!”

 

Noya surged forward and tried to yank the bottle away from him, but Hinata pushed and fought and the two of them ended up on the floor, the pills spilling out of the bottle and scattering throughout the bathroom.

 

“Let me go!” Hinata shouted.

 

“Stop fighting,” Noya practically begged.

 

“Get off!”

 

“Hinata-“

 

“Stop it!”

 

“Please-“

 

“NO!” Hinata’s sobs came out as screams. “No, please, senpai, please stop. Please let me do this.”

 

“Stop fighting me,” Noya begged again. The whole team was in the hallway staring in at the scene. “Please, Shouyou.”

 

Even though Nishinoya was smaller, he was stronger. Hinata stopped fighting eventually and went limp in Noya’s arms, crying into his shirt.

 

“I’m tired of this,” he cried. “I can’t do it anymore.”

 

Suga came and kneeled down next to them. “Let us help you.”

 

“You can’t.”

 

“Let us try,” Suga said. He ran a hand through Hinata’s hair. “Let us at least try.”

 

Hinata just sobbed harder. He didn’t want to fight anymore.

 

But these people were going to force him to, weren’t they? 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> do i need to write a sequel to this? let me know! also i’ll take TWO OR THREE more requests before they’re closed again :)  
> EDIT: requests are closed now!!


	16. Navy Blue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> olevaot: “a version of hinata that feels like he needs to be cold and detached (and secretly insecure) as a consequence of living a tragic life, and kageyama being way softer and welcoming as opposed to him”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AKA me projecting onto the characters

“Dad hurt himself last night. He’s gone.”

 

Hinata’s vision went white. The nine year old boy didn’t know how to comprehend his father’s suicide, so it drove him into depression of his own.

 

Think of it: a nine year old who actually wants to die.

 

He didn’t even know what depression was at that age. Before now, “suicide” was just a strange word that had no meaning to him.

 

He’d grown up surrounded by the alcoholism, the drugs, the sporadic violence, but he hadn’t expected this.

 

Now it was just him, his sister, and his mother.

 

“Mother” was a strange thing to call her. She was more of a stranger who just happened to be putting a roof over their heads and sometimes left them money when she disappeared for days on end. Meanwhile, Hinata actually raised his seven year old sister. He helped her on homework, he made her breakfast, he took her to school in the morning and tucked her in at night.

 

He was more of a mother than their mother ever was.

 

After their dad’s suicide, she stopped trying. Natsu was still in diapers and Hinata quickly learned that he had to fight through his debilitating depression in order to survive, and to keep his sister alive. So he did. He got a job, learned to cook, and went on with life. He wasn’t a normal kid- he never would be- but he was fine with that if it meant Natsu might be able to live a slightly normal life.

 

Now he was starting high school. It was a miracle he’d made it this far, honestly. He was sure he wouldn’t make it through middle school- in fact, he had to go to a high school where no one knew him because of how poorly he was treated. He just hoped this school was far enough away that no one would know who he was.

 

Hinata walked with his sister to the front of Natsu’s school. He kissed the top of her head.

 

“Have a good day,” he said.

 

“I will!”

 

Hinata watched as the girl confidently walked into the school. She had to start at a new school, as well, so it would be close enough to Hinata’s new one. She wasn’t phased by it though. She was always strong.

 

The redhead reluctantly tore his eyes away and took off towards Karasuno High School. When he got there, he walked through the front door, immediately bumping headfirst into a much taller person. Stumbling back, Hinata looked up.

 

“Watch it,” he said.

 

He would’ve said more, but he was cut off when he saw those eyes. Those piercing blue eyes that seemed to see right through him.

 

That only made him angrier.

 

The boy spluttered for a minute but before he could respond, Hinata turned and walked away. So much for making a good impression.

 

Hinata rushed to his first period class: biology. He went straight to a lab table in the back of the room and waited for the class to start. Students flowed inside and no one came to partner up with him- thank goodness. He wasn’t sure why he was so unapproachable, maybe it was the earrings, or the fact that he probably looked as antisocial as he was. Part of him wanted friends, wanted acceptance.

 

Another part of him knew it was something unrealistic.

 

When class was just about to start, the door opened again and that blue eyed boy from the hallway walked through. Hinata watched him scan the room for a seat and then his eyes landed on Hinata and he moved, the ginger sighing as the boy sat in the seat next to him.

 

“Sorry for running into you earlier,” the boy said. “I’m Kageyama.”

 

“Hinata,” he replied.

 

Class started and Hinata tried to ignore his new lab partner, but it was hard when he was so compelled to stare into his deep blue eyes. It was almost addicting.

 

“Have you joined any clubs yet?” Kageyama asked.

 

“No. Clubs aren’t really my thing.”

 

Hinata didn’t want to be stuck in some stupid book club or manga club or something. He had better things to do after school.

 

“How about trying out for the volleyball club?”

 

That got Hinata’s attention. “Volleyball?”

 

“Yeah. You never know, you might be really good at it.”

 

He considered this. When he was younger, Hinata had this wild ambition to be a professional volleyball player- that is, before he got a wake up call and realized that life wasn’t about accomplishing your dreams, it was about surviving.

 

Still, he had his doubts.

 

“I don’t think so,” he said.

 

“Come on,” Kageyama said. “Just try it. We have practice in the morning and after school.”

 

“I’ll... I’ll think about it.”

 

Why was Kageyama being so nice? They’d only just met, and Hinata was an ass to him in the hallway. What kind of person was he?

 

-

 

“Alright, I’ll be by to get you at the normal time,” Hinata said as Natsu strode off toward her school. “Have a good day.”

 

Upon arriving at Karasuno High, Hinata was approached by Kageyama. He winced, because the smile on the other boys face was one that held expectation- something that gave Hinata anxiety.

 

“So...?” Kageyama stared at him.

 

Hinata raised his eyebrows. “So... What?”

 

“Are you going to come to practice?”

 

“I-I can’t,” Hinata said. “I have to pick my sister up after school.”

 

“Just go get her and bring her with you,” Kageyama said. “She can sit with our manager. I’m sure she wouldn’t mind.”

 

Hinata stared, defeated. “Fine.”

 

When the time came, Hinata waited outside of Natsu’s school until she came out and approached him with the normal smile on her face.

 

“You okay if we hang out at my school for a little bit?” He asked. “I’m sure there’s some people who can help you on your homework.”

 

“Sure!”

 

The whole way back to Karasuno, thoughts and worries plagued Hinata’s mind. What if he wasn’t good enough? What if they hated him?

 

They got to the school, Hinata holding Natsu’s hand as they walked towards the gym. Kageyama stood outside, leaning against the railing of the stairs.

 

“I’m glad you could come,” he said. “Are you Natsu?” The girl nodded. “My friend Yachi is really excited to meet you. Let’s go inside and say hi.”

 

Natsu let go of Hinata’s hand and grabbed onto Kageyama’s already outstretched one. The blue eyed boy was really good with her already.

 

They entered the gym and the boys who were scattered about the room, stretching and talking, turned to them and smiled.

 

“Hey, guys,” Kageyama said. “This is Hinata. He might be joining the club- and this is his sister, Natsu. She’ll be our... Junior Manager.”

 

There were words and exclamations of welcome. The boys all seemed so excited. The coach gave Hinata a firm clap on the back and instructed him to stretch, looking him up and down and eyeing his torn up tennis shoes. Hinata blushed at the man’s wary glance at the hole where his big toe stuck out.

 

Hinata did stretch. He sat down next to Kageyama and copied his movements, making sure he felt his muscles stretching so he didn’t injure himself later.

 

“Alright,” Kageyama said. “Why don’t you try spiking?” He turned to an older boy, one with dark hair. “Is that okay, Daichi?”

 

Daichi nodded. “Yeah. Just try to find whatever you’re good at. I guess starting with spiking is okay, considering Kageyama is a setter.”

 

Hinata went over to one side of the net with Kageyama.

 

“So... What do you want me to do?”

 

“Yachi will throw me the ball,” Kageyama said. “Then I’ll set it, and you jump and spike it.”

 

Hinata nodded and watched Kageyama’s movements as he set the ball. He jumped as high as he could and ended up missing the ball, far to the left and much too high. His feet hit the floor and he felt shame rise in his chest.

 

“That’s fine,” Kageyama said. “How about this. Just jump and I’ll bring the ball to you. Don’t look for it.”

 

“O-Okay,” Hinata stuttered.

 

He got into position and when the time was right, he wrenched his eyes shut and jumped as high as he could, slamming his hand downward and-

 

-It made contact with the ball. Hinata’s feet hit the ground and he looked over at Kageyama with a wide grin, but quickly hid his enthusiasm. He expected everyone to be excited, but the only one cheering was Natsu.

 

“Good job, Shou-chan!” She was clapping.

 

“You,” Kageyama said. “You had your eyes closed.”

 

“...Yeah,” Hinata said nervously. “You said not to look. Was I... Was I not supposed to do that?”

 

“No, it’s... I mean...” Kageyama stuttered. “You hit the ball, so it’s fine, right guys?”

 

There were mumbled of affirmation from around the gym and one boy stepped forward, a threatening one with a shaved head.

 

“That’s a strong arm you got there,” he said, gripping and squeezing Hinata’s bicep.

 

“Thanks,” he said, shaking the boy’s grip away.

 

The boy looked hurt, but walked away.

 

“Let’s do it again,” Hinata said.

 

They played more and more and the feeling was exhilarating. The feeling of the air rushing through his hair, his heart pumping a mile a minute, his hand stinging when it made contact with the ball. Even the burn of his legs when he began to get tired made him want to keep playing.

 

“Hinata,” Kageyama said eventually. “Practice is ending soon. We need to do some cool down laps.”

 

“Oh.” He was disappointed, but he didn’t let it show on his face or in his voice. “Okay.”

 

They ran a few laps and when they finished, Hinata joined Natsu. They were about to head out when Kageyama called after him.

 

“Go see if Yachi needs help cleaning up,” Hinata told Natsu. She did so and he turned to face Kageyama. “What do you want?”

 

“So,” he began. “Do you want to join the team?”

 

Hinata sighed. “I don’t know. I don’t think it’s a good idea.”

 

Kageyama’s expression fell. “Why’s that?”

 

“I don’t usually... Work well with people.” Hinata didn’t know if he should elaborate.

 

Kageyama stepped forward and placed a hand on his elbow. He tried to move away, but the setter grabbed him.

 

“Stop pushing me away. I’ve been trying to be your friend but you won’t let me. Why won’t you let me?”

 

“Because!” Hinata yelled. “Soon you’ll just realize that I’m not worth it.”

 

“What?” Kageyama stepped back slightly. “What does that mean?”

 

Hinata scoffed, turning around. “Forget it. I’m leaving- and I’m not joining your team.”

 

“Wait, Hinata,” Kageyama begged. “You are worth it, though.”

 

The redhead stopped in his tracks. He clenched his fists, closing his eyes.

 

“You are worth it,” Kageyama continued. “You don’t deserve to have people just leave you. I won’t leave you. With me, you’re invincible.”

 

Hinata turned around slowly, blinking away the tears that collected in his eyes.

 

“Fine,” he said. “I’ll join your team. Just... Don’t go back on your word, okay?”

 

Kageyama smiled.

 

“I would never.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WHEN REQUESTS ARE CLOSED IF YOU COMMENT A REQUEST I WILL NOT DO IT!!! so sorry for being rude but i just get stressed out really easily please be patient with me!


	17. Rolling Thunder: Part 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The_Bookworm requested a part three to Rolling Thunder

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> here’s the third installment of the very first request fic i did!

It had been a few months since the accident. Some of them were completely recovered already, while others were still working at it.

 

Kageyama sat in the classroom, gripping his pencil in an aching hand. He was doing fine at the beginning of class, but his hand was getting tired and now his notes were scribbles, at best.

 

The bell rang and Kageyama stood. He went down the hall to his locker and fumbled with the lock on it until it opened. His physical therapist encouraged him to use the hand for whatever he could so he could get stronger faster. It was working, but it was still annoying. Kageyama hated his weekly physical therapy appointments and he hated missing practice for them even more.

 

Not that practice was really official, anyway- they weren’t participating in any official games yet. It was basically an extension of physical therapy and building themselves back up to what they used to be. Everyone had lost muscle mass and stamina since the accident. The crows were once again flightless.

 

Everyone was back at school at this point and a lot of them were fully recovered, no permanent injuries. Some of them weren’t as lucky.

 

Nishinoya had constant headaches and dizzy spells. The doctors said it was something that might never go away. He was starting to look at medications to at least make it less intense, but nothing could take it away completely. His doctor wanted to put him in therapy to help him cope with the pain, but he outright refused. He didn’t want therapy, and he said it over and over again. The pain wasn’t something he could will away. It was real- very real- and he needed real help.

 

Yamaguchi was finally getting his cast off his leg. It had been immobilized for so long that he’d need physical therapy to be able to jump and run the way he used to, but he seemed optimistic.

 

“It could be worse,” he always said. “Someone could have died.”

 

It was true, but not everyone had the same mindset.

 

Tsukishima was permanently blind in one eye. He had a scar that ran along his eyelid from where the glass from the broken glasses punctured it and his eye remained unseeing. His depth perception and his sight were off, and his volleyball skills were suffering as well.

 

“It’s just a stupid club,” he said, obviously trying to hide the bitterness in his voice. “I don’t need to be doing this, anyway.”

 

Yet he still came to practice. It was strange, he almost seemed determined to get his abilities back, even though he kept saying that he didn’t care.

 

Daichi’s injuries had recovered well, but his stamina had taken a dive. He’d been told he had asthma and had to keep an inhaler on him at all times. At first it was a struggle, getting back into the game, but he figured out that if he just took his inhaler before he even went on the court, then he was better off.

 

The captain had to sit out a lot. He had to take frequent breaks and it was discouraging. He wanted to step down as captain and hand the position straight over to Ennoshita, but everyone told him not to. The second year outright refused to accept the position and Daichi dubiously continued to be captain.

 

Suga was finally recovered from his shoulder surgery. He finally had full use of his arm and, though it was still a little stiff, he could do most things he could do before.

 

Lifting his arm all the way above his head to set a ball was a challenge, but it was still early in the recovering process. Even if he wasn’t at his best yet, he knew he would be soon.

 

Hinata was still mostly wheelchair bound. He was walking better in therapy and he was attending school, but a full recovery was still a while away. In the mean time he was getting discouraged. His words were cheerful and his smiles were wide, but being so immobilized and dependent was depressing. When he thought no one was looking, his smiled faded. Everyone knew that it was normal for him to get discouraged, but the fact that he was trying to hide it was worrisome.

 

Every other team member had little to no injury. They spent their days being as encouraging and helpful as they could be. The second years carried gatorade and salty snacks on them at all times in case Nishinoya ever felt the twinge of a headache. Tanaka always did wheelies with Hinata’s wheelchair and helped Tsukishima practice blocking more accurately. Asahi was the keeper of one of Daichi’s spare inhalers and always made sure he took it easy.

 

They were supporting each other, but the fact that some of them were permanently injured took quite the toll.

 

Kageyama walked down the hallway and stopped when he saw groups of students parting to let a mop of orange hair in a wheelchair get through. People still stared. Kageyama didn’t think they would ever stop staring.

 

“Hey, Kageyama,” Hinata said. “Can you help me get to English? My arms are tired.”

 

Kageyama grabbed the handles of the wheelchair and pushed Hinata toward the elevator where he inserted his key and they waited for the door to open.

 

“Yamaguchi’s supposed to be back on the court soon,” Hinata said. “Isn’t that cool? He just needs some therapy for a couple of weeks and then he can start volleyball again.”

 

“That’s great,” Kageyama said. “Suga said he’ll be back soon, too. Really back, I mean. Not just half-back like he’s been.”

 

“Looks like everyone’s finally getting better,” Hinata replied with a grin.

 

“We’re just waiting on you, it looks like.”

 

At that, Hinata scowled and his voice hardened. “I’m trying as hard as I can.”

 

Kageyama’s chest tightened. “I know, I’m just saying that we’re excited for you to get better. That’s all.”

 

The redhead’s expression softened, but his frown still remained and his arms were still crossed when they entered their classroom.

 

It was true that they were waiting on him. Many of the team members insisted on forfeiting from the season until their entire team was back on their feet and on the court.

 

“I don’t think you boys understand that it could be years before Hinata’s jumping the way he was again,” Ukai said. “People don’t just come back from an injury like that so quickly.”

 

Hinata wasn’t the only one that could be out of commission for ever. Daichi could barely last a full set without having an asthma attack. Nishinoya couldn’t do dives or his signature moves anymore because of the jostling of his head. Kageyama wondered if they’d ever be the team they were before.

 

-

 

Daichi stood on the court and he felt his windpipe burning, the sensation running down his throat and into his chest. He was hyper-aware if the outline of his diaphragm and it felt like string was wrapped tightly around each of his lungs, constricting them tightly.

 

In hindsight, he should’ve stopped a while ago, but now there was an audible wheeze to his breath and Suga was staring at him worriedly. Daichi resisted the urge to meet his eyes, ignoring him completely. He could do this. He could make it through the rest of this set.

 

“Time out,” Suga called. “Everyone go get a drink.”

 

Suga emerged from Daichi’s peripheral vision and grabbed his hand, leading him off the court. He couldn’t even make it through a practice match. His legs felt heavy as Suga dragged him over to the bench and sat him down.

 

“In the front pocket of your bag?”

 

Daichi nodded.

 

Suga handed him the inhaler and his shaking hands opened the cap and shook it, placing it on his lips and pressing it down. He took as deep a breath as he could without coughing and held it. After a second puff, he laid down and breathed for a second and the white that danced around his vision slowly began to fade.

 

“You need to take better care of yourself,” Suga said, putting the inhaler back in it’s rightful place. “You could really hurt yourself.”

 

“I know,” Daichi said breathlessly. His lungs still ached, but at least he could get a deep breath in.

 

“Rest for a while. I’ll take over.”

 

A water bottle was placed in Daichi’s hand and he closed his eyes and listened to Suga direct the rest of the players in what they needed to do next. He heard the squeak of shoes on the floor and the sound of the whistle. He also heard the sound of rolling wheels. Daichi opened his eyes and looked to his right to where Hinata had parked his wheelchair next to him, small frown on his face.

 

“How’re you feeling?”

 

“I’ll be okay,” Daichi replied, moving to sit up. Hinata leaned down and placed a hand on his shoulder.

 

“Lay down,” he said. “Suga told me not to let you up for at least ten minutes.”

 

Daichi wanted to scold his underclassman, but he knew that Suga was much scarier than he ever could be, so he let it go.

 

“Do you need a ride home today?” Daichi offered instead.

 

“No, Asahi’s taking me. Thanks, though.”

 

They continued to make small talk, neither of them really paying attention to practice anymore, until almost twenty minutes went by. Daichi got up with a clear chest and went back to play again.

 

-

 

Practice was over and it was Yamaguchi and Tsukishima’s turn to lock up. The former walked with a crutch still, so he asked Tanaka to help them get it done quicker. He agreed, insisting that he always loved helping his underclassmen, and Tsukishima had an idea.

 

“Would you help me practice blocking?”

 

Tanaka was surprised at the first year’s initiative to get in extra practice, but agreed enthusiastically. He situated himself on one side of the net and Tsukishima on the other, Yamaguchi standing with one hand on his crutch and his other hand occupied by a ball and throwing it towards Tanaka to spike. He spiked it once, and Tsukki missed the block. He spiked it a second time, and he missed it again, and again, and again.

 

“That’s okay,” Tanaka said. “We can just-“

 

“Don’t go easy on me now,” Tsukishima said. “Let’s go again.”

 

Tanaka sent Yamaguchi a worried glance and the latter returned it. They complied, though, and Tsukishima’s face contorted into one of anger and concentration before eventually he stopped, staring at the ground. His hands were clenched in shaking fists and his shoulders heaved up and down with breaths.

 

“Tsukki,” Yamaguchi said. “It’s-“

 

“I’m just going to quit.” Tsukishima looked up. “I don’t know why I’m still trying. It’s just a goddamn club.” He began picking up volleyballs and throwing them into the crate. “Just a club.”

 

“You don’t need to quit.”

 

Everyone looked over to the door where Kageyama was standing.

 

“Forgot my water bottle and came back to find you wallowing in self pity. What the hell is wrong with you?”

 

Tsukishima scowled. “Not everyone has your freaky abilities, King.”

 

“I agree,” Kageyama said. “Tanaka, keep spiking- and don’t go easy on him.”

 

“Tch, seriously?” Tsukishima growled. “I’m done with this dumb club.”

 

“No you’re not,” Yamaguchi piped in. “You’re not and you haven’t been. That’s why you keep practicing. If you walk out that door, you’ll show up at practice tomorrow and keep missing blocks and this will happen all over again. So let Kageyama do what he wants to do, dammit!”

 

The gym was absorbed in silence, everyone staring at how Yamaguchi had dropped his crutch and was pointing at Tsukishima angrily.

 

“Jesus, okay,” Tsukki said, but his voice lacked the bite that it usually had.

 

The blond grabbed Yamaguchi’s crutch and handed it to him and went to grab balls from around the gym to hand to Tanaka. The second year threw the ball to Kageyama who set it, and Tanaka spiked it hard, right through Tsukishima’s attempt at a block.

 

“Again,” Kageyama said.

 

Tsukishima scowled deeper. “Seriously? Now you just want to watch me embarrass myself.”

 

“I need to watch what you’re doing wrong,” Kageyama said. “So do it again.”

 

They went two more times before Kageyama stopped moving, staring at Tsukishima intently.

 

“Your hands are always a bit to the left,” the setter said. “Try again, and watch closely.”

 

They went again and Tsukki reluctantly moved his hands a bit to the left of where he would have put them otherwise. He felt his eyes widen at the familiar sensation of the smack of the ball on his hand. He watched it fall on the other side of the net, to the floor, and landed his jump, feeling the resonating sting on his palm.

 

The gym was, once again, engulfed in silence and everyone was just staring at each other. Yamaguchi looked at him, probably expecting some sort of apology, and Tanaka just had this sort of dumb grin on his face, while Kageyama didn’t look surprised at all.

 

“I told you it would work,” Kageyama said. Then he turned and whispered something into Tanaka’s ear. “Alright, let’s go again.”

 

They did, and Tsukishima jumped this time with more confidence than ever before, only for the ball to sail at an unexpected angle past his head. It didn’t hit his hand in the slightest. His feet hit the ground and he had to make an actual effort to keep the look of disappointment off his face.

 

“Predict where the ball is going to go,” Kageyama said. “Remember to do everything you’ve done before. Look at his shoulder and where he’s angled towards. Then just go left.”

 

Tsukki nodded and did what he said and he blocked it again- and again and again. He didn’t want to stop, he never wanted to stop, but Kageyama made them eventually.

 

“We have to leave before Coach swings back over to make sure everyone’s gone,” the setter said. “He used to catch me and Hinata here all the time. He’d yell at us about making sure we got a good amount of rest.”

 

He looked sad, almost.

 

Tsukishima brushed it off, because he felt lighter than he had in a long time. He kept reminding himself not to get too excited because it didn’t really matter. It was still just a stupid club.

 

A smile appeared on his face as he and Yamaguchi made the short trek home.

 

Just a stupid club.

 

-

 

Nishinoya winced as the doctor shone a bright light in his eye, getting uncomfortably close and damn near on top of him to get a closer look. His mother made faces at him from across the room, trying to get him to smile, but he scowled anyway because his head was pounding and he just wanted to go home and sit in the dark.

 

“Everything looks good,” the neurologist said. “I think it’s safe for us to take a new route in your treatment. There’s a medication that I’d like to try, but you’re not already on any medication, right?”

 

“Right,” his mother said.

 

They continued to talk medication and Nishinoya toned out the rest of it. They put him on some medicine that started with an “A” and they took the prescription and left. Nishinoya closed his eyes in the car and leaned his head back, trying not to get nauseous from the lights dancing between the trees and buildings. Closing his eyes wasn’t enough, so he dug the heels of his hands into them and ignored the white that spiraled across his otherwise black vision.

 

“Yuu?” His mother’s voice rang sharply in his ears. “We’re almost home. Do you want me to make anything specific for dinner?”

 

“No,” he said.

 

When the car stopped, he trudged into the house and down the hall, leaving his lights off as he laid down on his bed with his head buried in his pillow. Something had to give. He couldn’t be in pain for the rest of his life. Not really.

 

Right?

 

A couple of days went by and he started the medicine. It was irritating because it should be working by now, right? So then why was he still having constant headaches?

 

“You aren’t at the full dose yet, Yuu,” his mother said. “It takes time.”

 

Nishinoya didn’t want to let it take its time. He wanted to smack the medicine with a baseball bat until it stopped being lazy and did its job.

 

So he waited. He waited and eventually one pill turned into two, which turned to three. Eventually they gave him a whole new pill with a new dosage so he didn’t have to swallow multiple pills at once. His resentment grew for his doctors, for his mom, and for his body. For the accident and for his teammates who walked out unscathed. For everyone around him who walked through life pain free.

 

Then, he realized something. Somewhere through the anger and the resentment, he failed to realize that the pain was beginning to fade.

 

It wasn’t an extreme difference, but the lights didn’t make him as nauseous as they normally did. Nishinoya didn’t say anything, not out loud, because he was sure that if he told his mom about it the migraine would become exponentially worse. So he pushed the thought out of his mind and went about his daily activities. He went to practice, half-assed the whole time, and thanked God whenever Daichi needed them to take a water break.

 

Even so, he could feel his headaches decreasing in intensity and the constant ache behind his eyes dwindled to almost nothing.

 

One day, Nishinoya was sitting with the other second years having lunch outside of the gym. He ate his protein and his salty chips and drank his box of milk, just like the doctor recommended. He swallowed, then spoke.

 

“I don’t have a headache.”

 

The other boys looked at him.

 

“Really?” Ennoshita said. “Not even a little bit?”

 

“Not really,” Nishinoya replied. “Things still look kinda bright, but... It doesn’t really hurt? I don’t know.”

 

“Alright!” Tanaka exclaimed loudly, followed by harsh shushing.

 

“He’s finally not in pain, and you want to give him a headache from your screaming?” Kinoshita quirked his eyebrow.

 

For the first time in a long time, Noya smiled. He smiled because his friends were now sitting there and bickering and even though the noise did create a small throb somewhere in his left temple, there were a few moments that he had where he wasn’t in pain and honestly, it was refreshing.

 

Maybe recovery was possible. Maybe Tsukishima would be some crazy volleyball blocking machine like he was before. Maybe Daichi would be able to make it through a full set again. Maybe Hinata would be able to run and jump just like he used to.

 

Suddenly, things didn’t seem so hopeless.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> after i finish all the prompts i have already, i think i’m taking a break from requests. i have a fic in mind that i really want to devote my attention to so i hope you understand. if you have requested a fic and i have responded to you, i will get to you eventually! be patient :)


	18. Be Smart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ScarletTheCat14: “How about a Kagehina chapter where Hinata is trans and has been wearing his binder for WAY too long and Kageyama finds out (cue overprotective Kageyama) please?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TRIGGER WARNING for dysphoria that is pretty graphically described.   
> ALSO i am not trans, i have NO knowledge on what it feels like so this could be totally wrong and I SINCERELY APOLOGIZE if i have offended anyone. i wrote this because i felt it would be out of my comfort zone and it would be a challenge for me and i hope i did well.

Hinata hated his body.

 

There were a lot of things he hated about it, like the stretch marks on his hip and the freckles that dusted his nose, but the thing he hated most about it was that it wasn’t the right gender.

 

Everything about the body was wrong. The soft curves of it and the short stature. What lay between his legs. There was one thing that he could do something about- albeit a small thing.

 

His chest. He couldn’t take it away entirely, but he could do the next best thing and make it almost disappear under his clothes. When his cousin gave him his old binder, he was ecstatic. Hinata’s parents were supportive of his identity- they argued with his school to allow him to use the boy’s restroom, they let him cut his hair short- but they didn’t understand the necessity of a binder. They didn’t understand a lot of things.

 

He went without one for so long that when he got one at the beginning of his freshman year of high school, he was almost too excited.

 

The volleyball team knew that Hinata was transgender. It came out in a fit of tears and worry the practice before a single night training camp and they all agreed that they’d keep it a secret from whoever they had to in order for Hinata to be treated equally.

 

When Ukai and Takeda allowed him without question to room with his fellow male teammates at the training camp, Hinata couldn’t help but start crying. While his family was as supportive as they could be, no one else had come close to being as understanding as his team.

 

They made him feel better. They made him feel valid.

 

So when he got home each day and looked down at his body, it was a rude awakening. He would stand in front of the mirror and close his eyes and pray for something to change, but he’d open his eyes and nothing would happen. He was disgusted with himself. The fact that he was stuck in a body that wasn’t his.

 

Despite that, when he put on his binder, he felt better.

 

He never wanted to take it off.

 

So, Hinata started adjusting the binder so it fit even tighter, made his chest even flatter, and wore it even longer.

 

It didn’t start out that way. At first he’d just put it on whenever he got up, take it off and use a sports bra for volleyball, put it back on for school, take it off again for afternoon practice, and put it on for the trek home. He’d take it off when he slept and start over again in the morning. Soon, though, he decided that wearing it to bed wouldn’t hurt. Then he decided to wear it for practice. It got to the point where he was only taking it off to shower- but he didn’t care. It was the one thing he could do to make himself feel better.

 

To make him hate himself less.

 

Hinata got used to the shortness of breath that persisted and worsened as time went on. He got used to the progressing pain and pushed it out of his mind because it was worth it.

 

It was worth it until he passed out at practice.

 

He didn’t completely lose consciousness, but what Hinata remembered was that the pain got to be too much. He wasn’t sure how he got on the ground, but he must have fallen instead of jumping for the spike he was going for.

 

Kageyama was on him instantly.

 

“Hinata?” His deep blue eyes were filled with worry. “Hinata? Hey. Wake up.”

 

“Can’t-“ He gasped, white framing his vision. “Breathe.”

 

“What’s wrong with him?” Daichi asked.

 

“Everyone go away,” Kageyama said. There were shouts of confusion and protest before he clarified. “I need to loosen his binder. Go away.”

 

Slowly everyone retreated from the gym, Hinata gasping and red faced on the floor and Kageyama kneeling over him.

 

“Yachi?” The setter called. “Can you stay?”

 

She let out a sort of anxious squeak before nodding.

 

Hinata felt Kageyama’s hands on the hem of his shirt.

 

“Is this okay,” Kageyama asked.

 

The spiker felt tears fall down his cheeks and he nodded.

 

Kageyama’s hands trailed up his shirt and Hinata felt his binder give way until it was loosely hanging off of his chest. Kageyama’s hands retreated and Hinata tried to suck in a wheezing breath, coughing and hacking until his vision went completely white.

 

The setter looked to Yachi. “Do you have a sports bra?”

 

“Yeah,” she said. “I’ll go get it.”

 

She left and Hinata went to sit up, Kageyama placing gentle hands on his back and assisting.

 

“How long were you wearing that?”

 

Hinata sighed. “I don’t know. A day and a half maybe? I took it off to shower this morning though.”

 

“How long did you shower for?”

 

“Like, ten minutes.”

 

“Hinata!”

 

The spiker looked scared almost. “What?! Why are you yelling?”

 

“Because you can’t do that!” Kageyama looked furious. “You could hurt yourself!”

 

“But...” Hinata’s eyes watered. “But I don’t want... I don’t want to be a girl.”

 

As he cried, Kageyama’s face softened. “Hinata...”

 

“When I wear it I feel good,” the redhead cried. “I feel like... Like an actual boy.”

 

“You are an actual boy,” Kageyama said. “Binder or not, you’re a boy. But you can’t be a boy if you suffocate and die.”

 

Hinata was silent then, because he knew what Kageyama meant. He knew that what he was saying needed to be taken seriously because at the rate he was going, he could get seriously hurt. He knew this, but it didn’t make it any easier.

 

“I’m back!”

 

Yachi emerged from the door with her sports bra neatly folded and clutches between both of her hands, keeping it private from the world.

 

“Do you want to go to the bathroom to put it on?” Kageyama asked.

 

Hinata shook his head. “I’ll just go to the corner.”

 

He went over and faced the corner of the gym, peeling his shirt and his binder off his body and staring at the bruising that decorated his ribs. He’d never noticed it before and from the grumbling behind him, he figured Kageyama saw it right off the bat.

 

When he was all changed, Hinata went back to his friends.

 

“You need to be smart,” Kageyama said as they walked towards the door. “I know that’s going to be hard for a dumbass like you, but you need to try.”

 

Hinata snickered. “Okay.”

 

Suddenly, Ukai burst through the gym doors.

 

“I leave for fifteen minutes and you pass out?! I can’t even go pick up my dry cleaning anymore, huh?!”

 

Hinata went home that day and didn’t put his binder back on. He took Suga’s advice and iced his ribs and practiced taking deep breaths. As much as it hurt to say it, Kageyama was right. He was right about a lot of things.

 

Hinata may not feel like it sometimes, but he was a boy. An actual boy. Binder or not. If he ever wanted to make other people realize this, he needed to be sure of it, himself.

 

He needed to be smart about it.


	19. Hold You Up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daisy: “Hinata’s mother is mentally ill and his father passed away. Word about his family gets around school and he is bullied for it.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i want to remind everyone that i never proof read anything ever goodnight

“Mom, it’s okay,” Hinata whispered into the phone. “I’m just going to be home a little late. It’s no big deal.”

 

“Why, again?” She said, voice breathy and trembling. “You remember the code word, right?”

 

“Yes,” Hinata said. “I just don’t need to use it right now. My coach wants to talk to us after practice, so I’ll be a couple of minutes late. Only a couple.”

 

“Who is making you say these things?”

 

Hinata pinched the bridge of his nose. “No one, Mom, I swear. I’ll be back within a half hour of the normal time, and I’ll be back all in one piece. I promise.”

 

“You... You promise?” She sounded so afraid. Hinata hated it when she was afraid.

 

“Yes,” he said firmly. “Have I ever broken a promise before?”

 

“No, you haven’t.”

 

“Take a deep breath mom,” he said. He looked at the clock. “Your shows are almost on. You should sit down now so you don’t miss the beginning.”

 

“I love you, Shouyou.”

 

“I love you, too.”

 

This was a normal occurrence in Hinata’s day. Whenever the strict schedule they had was interrupted, Hinata’s mother would be reduced to incoherent ramblings of paranoia and worry. It was up to him and his sister to keep her grounded.

 

Today was no different, and now he had to make sure that no matter what Ukai had to say, he was out in enough time to make it back home as soon as possible. No doubt she would be pacing around the house, Natsu trying to console her as well as she could.

 

Ukai sat all of the boys down after practice and announced that they would be leaving for their very first overnight training camp. Amidst the shouts and whoops of his teammates, all Hinata could do was sigh and place his chin in his palm, waiting for the coach to hand out permission slips. He’d take one, but he’d never turn it in. There was no way he’d be able to go. He knew that and he didn’t resent his mother. It wasn’t her fault that she was sick. He loved her and he would give up anything to take care of her. At the same time, he wished he could have a carefree weekend and go on a trip with his friends.

 

When he was done, they all went home. As he and Kageyama walked, the setter seemed worried about why he was quieter than usual. Instead of asking what was wrong, he asked something else.

 

“Are you excited for the training camp?”

 

“I’m not going.”

 

Kageyama seemed devastated. Devastated and angry.

 

“What?! What the hell- why?!”

 

“Because I have to take care of my mom,” he replied. “She’s sick.”

 

Kageyama stared at him, eyebrows raised. “Why can’t your dad do it?”

 

“He died last year,” Hinata deadpanned.

 

His setter was silent then, and Hinata knew why. He thought it was sad, and he didn’t know what to say. Hinata didn’t want his pity- he didn’t want anyone’s pity. He wanted to live his life and figure things out as he went along. He knew his situation wasn’t ideal, but this was just how it was.

 

“Oh,” Kageyama said. “I’m sorry.”

 

“Thanks.”

 

They came to the street where they would soon part ways and Kageyama stopped, Hinata stopping a few steps ahead of him and looking back.

 

“I hope your mom gets better soon,” he said.

 

Hinata smiled. “Thanks,” he repeated.

 

When he arrived home, the redhead did their special knock on the door before unlocking it entering- once, then three times, then five- to let his mom know that it was only him. When he entered she was standing, Natsu sitting on the couch behind her.

 

“Oh, Shouyou,” the woman said, throwing her arms around him. She smelled like sweat and his dad’s old cologne, something she sprayed on herself almost obsessively. “I was afraid you’d never be back. Are you okay?”

 

“Of course I am,” he said. “I told you I’d be back a little late, remember?”

 

“Right,” she said, hand playing with the end of her tangled hair.

 

“How about you get a bath,” he said. “I’ll set out the nice bath salts you like, and while you’re in the tub I’ll make dinner. Is that okay?”

 

“That’s wonderful,” she said, placing a kiss on his forehead. “Natsu, will you help your brother?”

 

“Yes, Mommy,” she replied.

 

Their mother disappeared up the staircase and Hinata went behind her to get the bath salts. He placed them on the edge of the tub and started the water running before heading back down to where Natsu was.

 

“Ready to get dinner ready?”

 

He ducked under the counter and retrieved the lock box where knives and other sharps were kept, locked away from his mother so she couldn’t hurt herself. He first realized that he had to keep such things locked away when he got home from school one day to find that his mother had never picked up Natsu, and was bleeding on the floor. They took her to the hospital and lied in her favor, but that served as a wake up call for Hinata that she was a danger to herself.

 

Since then, pills and sharps and chemicals were all locked up. She protested at first, but came to appreciate it because she knew he was just looking out for her. He was worried that she would become destructive while he wasn’t home just to get to these things, but she seemed to forget where they were, eventually.

 

She was forgetting a lot of things, recently.

 

“Dinner’s ready!”

 

Hinata heard his voice ring through the house and within the next few minutes his mother was walking down the stairs, met with a set table and her two kids smiling at her. She smiled.

 

“What would I do without you two?” The woman sat down in between her children and grabbed each of their hands. “Please never leave me. I don’t know what I would do.”

 

The two siblings just smiled back because what would they do, either? Taking care of their mother had become their life since their father died. They came to resent it at times, but either way they loved her- and they knew she loved them too.

 

-

 

Hinata was sitting in English class, practically falling asleep while the teacher dragged on and on about conjunctions- something he didn’t understand in the first place and knew he wouldn’t get. Then, the teacher’s phone rang and she went to answer, the class taking the opportunity to talk as much as they pleased.

 

“Hinata,” the teacher said. “You’re needed in the office.”

 

Confused, he grabbed his bag and stood. The teacher signed him a hall pass and he walked the empty halls until he stood outside the office doors, seeing a familiar face in the window. He opened the doors.

 

“Mom?” She whirled around to face him. “What’s going on?”

 

“Shouyou, we’re leaving.”

 

Her eyes were wild and her hair was unkempt, her shoes mismatching. Hinata knew what was happening. He scanned the office, the receptionist behind the desk and the student, who was probably in trouble, sitting and waiting on a chair. He placed a hand on his mother’s arm.

 

“Mom, calm down. What’s going on?”

 

“They’re coming,” she said. “I just barely got to you in time. We have to go get your sister now before they get her, too.”

 

Hinata heard the student snickering. He brushed it off.

 

“I can’t leave school. I have a test next period and I can’t miss it. Go home and I’ll be there as soon as I can- I’ll skip practice, even.”

 

“Shouyou-“

 

“Mom.” He said, looking her in the eye. “Everything is okay. Okay? Leave me and leave Natsu and go back home.”

 

She took a step back. “Okay.” She took a deep breath. “Okay.” She turned and walked out the door, repeating the word over and over again. “Okay, okay, okay.”

 

When she was gone, Hinata faced the receptionist.

 

“I’m sorry,” he said sheepishly. “She’s sick and I guess she’s having a bad day. Am I good to go to class?”

 

She nodded and Hinata left, exchanging a glance with the other boy who sat in the office. He was smiling, but the look in his eyes was unreadable.

 

Instead of going back to class, Hinata headed straight to the bathroom and locked himself in a stall. He needed to calm down. He was sad, and embarrassed, and worried. What if she got in an accident on the way home? What if she kept wandering off while he wasn’t home? This just meant she was getting worse. What if she kept getting worse?

 

She was getting worse.

 

Hinata cried.

 

-

 

It wasn’t until the next day that Hinata noticed something was awry.

 

As he walked through the building, stares piled up and whispered reached his ears. He brushed it off and walked to his first class, sitting down and placing his head on his desk. His mother was up most of the night and he had to make sure she didn’t leave the house or do anything dangerous.

 

Someone tapped his shoulder and he looked up to see a blonde girl leaning over his desk, her darker haired friend standing behind her.

 

“Is it true that your mom is, like, crazy?”

 

Hinata’s mouth went dry. “Um... No?”

 

“I heard she went crazy on you in the office yesterday,” the girl said.

 

“I mean... She was upset,” Hinata spluttered.

 

“Yeah, but did she like-“

 

The bell rang, and Hinata had never been more thankful for class to be starting. The girls went and sat and the stares continued, the people around him seemingly not even paying attention to the lesson. Hinata knew it would be a long day.

 

“His mom is batshit crazy.”

 

There were snickers and comments.

 

“What if the gene runs in the family?”

 

There were notes passed around and people pointing and laughing.

 

“We should stay away from him.”

 

There were shoved in the hallways because Hinata had suddenly become the target of every asshole in the school. He tried to keep his head low, but everyone seemed to know by the end of the week that his mom was sick. She wasn’t crazy. She was sick.

 

Suga caught him before practice one day.

 

“I’ve been hearing things, and I want to know you’re alright,” he said. “You don’t need to explain if you don’t want to. I just want to know if you’re okay.”

 

Hinata bit his lip. “My mom isn’t crazy.”

 

“I know,” Suga said.

 

“She’s just sick. She’s sick and it’s been getting worse and I don’t know what to do.”

 

Suga wore an expression of repressed worry. “Is there another adult at your house who can take care of her and knows what to do?”

 

Hinata shook his head. “It’s just me.”

 

There it was- that look of pity. Hinata wanted to turn around and leave right then and there, but he somehow couldn’t. Because mixed in with that pity was plain anxiety. It wasn’t too bold, but it was enough to make Hinata realize that Suga was more worried about him than he realized.

 

“It’ll be fine, Suga. I’ll be fine. I’ll figure it out.”

 

“Hinata-“

 

“No, I’ll figure it out.” He started backing away, a smile forced on his face. “Please don’t worry about me.”

 

Before Suga could say anything more, he walked away.

 

Within the next week, things got drastically worse. Hinata’s mom went into this state every so often where she would forget who he was. She would be afraid, she would be violent. In those moments, Hinata just told Natsu to stay in her room and tried to calm her down. Sometimes it resulted in her throwing things and trying to hit him. Luckily she was generally weak,and smaller than him, so all she got were a few scratches in.

 

Hinata didn’t know why his mother was getting so much sicker now of all times. He didn’t know what was going on and why it was making her so upset or how he could help. All he knew was that when he went to school, people teased him relentlessly. He was known as the kid with a “crazy bitch” for a mother and it made him angry. How dare they call his mother names like that? She was only sick. She didn’t know what she was doing- and she wasn’t crazy.

 

She wasn’t crazy.

 

She wasn’t crazy.

 

Soon came the time when people pointed out the nail marks on his arms, and the very rare occasion that one would appear on his face. He couldn’t help that his uniform was short sleeved! How was he supposed to cover them up? It made them laugh more, but the worry in Suga’s eyes grow.

 

Even Kageyama started asking him more questions about his mother. The setter would get uncharacteristically quiet all of a sudden and he’d slowly pry out information from Hinata about his situation- and Hinata would be oblivious to it until the conversation was over.

 

By far the worst was when it all came to an end. More so how it came to an end.

 

Takeda pulled him aside before practice one day and asked to talk. Hinata immediately knew what it was about, but he didn’t expect Coach Ukai to be following them out too. When the three of them were outside of the gym, the wind carrying the smell of gasoline from the road up to them, Takeda spoke.

 

“We’ve been hearing rumors about your situation at home, Hinata,” he said. “I don’t know if they’re true, but-“

 

“Hinata, we know somethings wrong,” Ukai cut in. “You can either tell us or we’re going to get the school involved.”

 

“My mom is sick,” Hinata said plainly. “She’s not crazy, she’s sick.”

 

“Elaborate,” Ukai demanded.

 

“She-She gets really upset sometimes,” he said. “She gets paranoid and thinks... Thinks people are out to get her. Sometimes she forgets who I am and she gets afraid and...” He looked down to the scratches on his arms. “I try to calm her down so she doesn’t scare my little sister. It doesn’t usually work. We just have to wait for it to pass.”

 

“Is anyone else there to help you?” Takeda asked. “Like your dad?”

 

“No,” Hinata said, staring at the ground. “He died a year ago.”

 

The teacher and the coach exchanged a glance and Hinata realized he’d said too much. This was the point of no return.

 

“Hinata...” Ukai said, voice softer than the redhead had ever heard it before. “We need to make some phone calls. You’re not safe at home and your mother needs he-“

 

“No!” Hinata didn’t realize he was going to shout, but words were tumbling out now. “No, I’m sorry I didn’t mean what I said, please don’t take her away from me! She needs me, I can take care of her, I swear. Just give me some time to figure things out and-“

 

“Hinata!” Ukai’s voice boomed through the entryway of the gym. “Stop. You can’t change my mind. Takeda is going to call and we’re going to wait here until he gets back.”

 

Hinata didn’t remember exactly what happened after that. What he did remember was that whoever Takeda called told him to call the hospital and get Hinata’s mother evaluated. Hinata remembered crying the whole way to the hospital and when they got there, a police officer stood with Natsu, who ran straight into his arms. Takeda and Ukai were still with him, having ended practice early.

 

“Why’s Mommy have to come to the hospital?” Natsu asked. “Is she getting sicker?”

 

“Yeah,” Hinata said, choking slightly.

 

“Is she going to die?”

 

He sighed. He knew Natsu would get scared like this.

 

“No, no, she’s not, she just needs...” He held in a whimper. “She needs help we can’t give her.”

 

A police officer approached them with a serious look on his face.

 

“Son,” he said. “Your mother is confused and upset. She keeps asking for you. Will you come with me?”

 

He nodded and stood, and Ukai placed an arm on his shoulder.

 

“We’ll watch your sister. Will you be okay?”

 

“Yeah,” he said quietly. “Thank you.”

 

Hinata was led down several white, busy hallways until they reached a room which had the door closed, loud voices coming from inside. The police officer opened the door and Hinata saw his mother being restrained on the bed, thrashing around and yelling for the people around her to go away.

 

“Shouyou!” She yelled. “Get these people off of me!”

 

“Get off of her,” he said. The people just stared. “Get off!”

 

They reluctantly took their hands off and stepped back as she scrambled to get away. Hinata walked forward and pulled her close.

 

“It’s okay, Mom,” he said. “They’re not going to hurt you, they’re going to help you.”

 

“What are you saying,” she demanded. “Who is putting you up to this?”

 

“No one,” he insisted. “Mom, you’re sick. You need help and I can’t help you anymore. I’m sorry I wasn’t with you when they came and got you.”

 

“Shouyou, I don’t like this,” she said. “We should just go home. Yeah, let’s go home.”

 

“We can’t,” he said. “You’re sick, and they’re going to help you.”

 

“Are you... Are you sure? I don’t trust them.”

 

“I promise,” Hinata said firmly. “I promise you’ll be okay. You’ll be safe and you may be a little scared at first, but you’ll get used to it and they’ll take good care of you. I won’t leave you.”

 

“You promise?” She stared up at him with wide eyes.

 

“I promise,” he reiterated, voice breaking. “Have I ever broken a promise before?”

 

She shook her head. Hinata was instructed to stand back while they gave her something to calm her down. Time went by quickly as they evaluated her and several people were in and out of the room. When she was calm and lucid, Hinata went and got Natsu so she could see her. He was sure she was as scared as their mother was.

 

Eventually the time came for her to go to the psychiatric ward. A police officer said it was time for them to say goodbye and all three of the Hinata family sat on the mother’s bed and cried. Hinata held in his tears as well as he could as his mother and sister sobbed with earnest, but a few slipped. Soon enough it was time for them to leave.

 

The Hinata children went to stay with their aunt in Tokyo for about a week until things got sorted out and they found someone in Karasuno to take them in. Suga was the first to volunteer, but his parents brought the rational thought that they didn’t have space for two more people in their house. Kageyama offered, but his parents said the same. They all said that the two could stay temporarily, but none of it was a permanent fix.

 

It wasn’t until Takeda said he would take them in that they had any hope of being able to stay in Karasuno. They went to stay with him, moved into the spare rooms in his house, and went back to school.

 

This wasn’t the kind of story where they “lived happily ever after.” They had to watch their mom be put in a nursing home and diagnosed with a plethora of mental illnesses. Hinata went back to school, back to the bullies and the teasing and the occasional slap of his books out of his hands and onto the ground. There was no happy, fairytale ending to this story.

 

What there was, though, was support- and a lot of it.

 

Kageyama found a way to meet him on his way to school, even on his new route from Takeda’s. He insisted on walking to school because he liked the exercise in the morning, so Takeda just dropped Natsu off at school and drove himself. It wasn’t much, but it helped Hinata feel like everything was normal still.

 

Suga always made sure Hinata knew he was there for him. He was always the first to realize when Hinata was having a bad day and he would pull him aside, let him cry or talk or just stay silent if he wanted to. It meant everything to Hinata to know that Suga would always be right there whenever he needed him.

 

The rest of the team chipped in, too, trying extra hard to boost his mood and be supportive. It made a world of difference to him that when Takeda had meetings after school, Daichi would drive him and Natsu to see their mom. Or that Nishinoya would “bake” treats for him- though he probably just had his mom do it.

 

No matter what happened, Hinata had his team.

 

The same way he held his mom up, they would hold him up.

 

Nothing was going to change that.


	20. Together

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daisy: “Hinata and Kageyama are the most popular idol duo. Hinata gets into a controversy (it can be like looking at another idol the ‘wrong way’ or making an inappropriate joke) due to this people start making comments about his appearance and weight. he gets really stressed and starts overworking and practically starves himself. He ends up collapsing on stage at a performace.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this was really fun to write??? idk i hope you like it as much as i do!

“Hinata Shouyou and Kageyama Tobio, Japan’s Freak Duo, to take the stage again next Friday!”

 

“Hottest stars in all of Japan!”

 

“The Freak Duo is taking the world by storm!”

 

“Have you gotten your tickets yet? If not, too bad! They sold out in less than eight minutes!”

 

Hinata stared at the newspaper, stars in his eyes.

 

“Kageyama, look at this!” He exclaimed. “Isn’t it awesome?”

 

Kageyama strode over to the leather chair where Hinata sat and looked at the paper. He scowled.

 

“Why did they put your name first?”

 

Hinata stuck out his tongue. “Maybe because I’m better than you.”

 

“Shut up, no you’re not,” Kageyama said, flicking him on the forehead. “Dumbass.”

 

Hinata and Kageyama were starting off their national tour, and they were having the time of their lives. Though Kageyama wouldn’t admit it, he enjoyed staying in hotel room after hotel room with Hinata. He liked the rush of trying to stay on schedule. He liked everything about being on tour. He couldn’t wait until they were to go internationally.

 

Throughout their careers, throughout their partnership, Kageyama and Hinata has this friendly rivalry. They’d try their best to out-do each other on stage and off stage, whether it be in the media or when meeting fans. It was all in good fun, though. In reality, they thought of each other as equals. So what if Hinata had a higher following than Kageyama did? Kageyama got more offers for solo jobs. Neither of them took solo jobs, though, because they were both satisfied with their partnership. Though he would never say it to the redhead’s face, he wouldn’t trade their friendship for all the money and all the solo gigs in the world.

 

Friday, the day of their next performance, was tomorrow. They were currently in their biggest city yet- Tokyo. This was, by far, the largest and most important performance of their tour. They had to start off well so ticket sales would go up for the rest of the tour. They were already almost sold out, so who knows? They might end up having to schedule more performances.

 

When Friday came, they woke up early. It was a whole day of set up and sound check and warming up and by the time people started lining up to get into the concert arena, they were already exhausted. Or, at least, Kageyama was.

 

“Aren’t you so pumped?” Hinata was practically shouting as he hopped slightly on his toes.

 

“How the hell are you so hyper,” Kageyama asked.

 

Hinata stopped hopping and shuffled around in his pocket, throwing a small bottle of liquid at him.

 

“Five-hour energy,” he read. “Seriously?”

 

“Yeah! It works great.”

 

Kageyama sighed and handed the bottle back to him.

 

Fast forward several hours and Kageyama and Hinata were just about to run on stage. Hinata was staring at him, still bouncing, and Kageyama felt rejuvenated. As soon as they stepped foot on stage and heard the crowd going wild before them, Kageyama felt more alive than ever before.

 

The show started and they performed to their hearts content, and then some. Kageyama could feel sweat start to fall down his back about halfway through, but they went on anyway because it was what they loved; it was perfect.

 

At the very end of the show, Hinata and Kageyama were wrapping it up before their last song.

 

“I have an idea,” Hinata said, side eyeing Kageyama mischievously. “How about you cheer for whoever you like best? Me or Kageyama?”

 

Everyone cheered and Kageyama smiled watching Hinata laugh. He would announce whoever’s name and the crowd would scream their praise for who they liked best. Seemed like he was advancing in their petty rivalry.

 

“Oh?” Hinata said, glancing in Kageyama’s direction. “You hear that, Kageyama? It sounds like they’re cheering for me!”

 

“You sure about that?” Kageyama laughed.

 

The crowd cheered again.

 

“Well, Kageyama, considering that I’m better than you...”

 

He trailed off and laughed, Kageyama laughing as well, but the crowd didn’t seem to be laughing as much as they expected. Were they... Booing?

 

No matter, because they were just starting their next song and they finished loud and strong. Hinata didn’t seem phased by what Kageyama thought he saw, so he must have been imagining it, right?

 

Right?

 

Once they finished, they ran off stage and Kageyama clapped Hinata on the back.

 

“You did good,” he said. Then, he smiled. “But I did better.”

 

Hinata cackled.

 

-

 

“Hinata Shouyou isn’t as kind as we all thought!”

 

“Hinata Shouyou makes fun of Kageyama Tobio on stage!”

 

“Is this what goes on behind the scenes with the duo?”

 

“What kind of person is Hinata Shouyou really? Has he been deceiving us all this time?”

 

Kageyama looked over Hinata’s shoulder, staring at the newspaper he was holding. His hands shook slightly and his knuckles were white.

 

“I...” Kageyama stuttered. “I don’t...”

 

“Did you think I was being serious?”

 

Kageyama stared at the big brown orbs that were now looking up at him. “What?”

 

“When I said I was better than you,” he said. “And that the crowd was cheering for me and not you. Did you think I was being serious?”

 

“What?!” Kageyama exclaimed. “No! No, no, I didn’t.”

 

He just barely heard Hinata whisper “good,” before he watched him open up Twitter. He was immediately bombarded with hateful subtweets.

 

“Do you really think you’re better than Kageyama? Because you suck!”

 

“You should take notes from Kageyama. You think you’re so good but you sound like a dying cat.”

 

“Sounds horrible. Looks horrible. Now acts horrible.”

 

There were words like “ugly,” “fat,” “gross,” and more and Kageyama saw Hinata’s shoulders shake. He reached down and took his phone, Hinata reaching up after him.

 

“Hey! Give it back!”

 

“No,” Kageyama said. “You don’t need to look at this. Calm down and then tweet something out later. I’ll say something too. Everyone will probably forget about it soon, anyway.”

 

“I’ve already lost twelve thousand followers,” Hinata said. “It’s been one night! Everyone hates me now.”

 

“They’ll get over it,” Kageyama assured. “The fact that they got mad so quick means they’ll get over it quick too.”

 

Hinata took a breath. “Okay. Can I at least have my phone back?”

 

Kageyama reluctantly handed it back to him.

 

Days passed and they had one then two then three more performances. Hinata wasn’t performing well, and Kageyama knew that everyone could see it. They both tried to tweet, snapchat, and instagram about the issue, but no one would listen to them.

 

“He uses his ego to make up for the fact that he’s an ugly fatass who can’t sing for shit.”

 

“Do you think Kageyama hates him too? Like, secretly?”

 

“I wish he would go away, forever.”

 

“Go fuck yourself!”

 

Words, shouted at Hinata on the street and over social media. People insulting everything about him that they could. People looking for every excuse possible to hate him.

 

“I’m okay, really,” Hinata would say.

 

Even when people would boo while he was onstage.

 

“I’m used to it now. It’s fine.”

 

Even though Kageyama doubted that anyone could ever get used to the amount of hate he was receiving.

 

But Hinata would put on a mask as soon as they got up in the morning. A mask of iron- iron that had a smile welded into it. Refusing to let anyone in while at the same time smiling as if nothing was wrong in the first place. To the naked eye, he seemed happy. Kageyama knew better.

 

They kept going with the tour, though. Kageyama’s ratings went up as Hinata’s went down. In any other circumstance he would have been happy, but not now.

 

They were about halfway done with their tour by now. Things were rocky and Kageyama kept telling Hinata that it wasn’t worth it, that they could cancel the rest of the tour until things settled down, but he kept insisting against it.

 

“I’m fine,” he insisted. “I’m fine, I’m fine.”

 

So the show went on.

 

Today, they were just about to go out in front of a crowd in Fukushima and Hinata was already on his second five-hour energy.

 

“Those things will kill you,” he told the redhead.

 

“Whatever,” Hinata replied.

 

“Have you even eaten or drank anything else today?”

 

“You worry too much,” was the only reply he got.

 

Kageyama decided against pressing it further, but he wished he had. They were out on stage and the crowd wasn’t as wild as it normally was, but neither of them paid any mind to that. What really bothered Kageyama was that Hinata wasn’t as energetic, either. In fact, his voice seemed shaky and his knees seemed to wobble. Eventually, Hinata’s voice faded out and Kageyama looked over in time to see him sway and begin to fall to the ground.

 

The taller boy surged forward and barely caught him as he fell, cradling him in his arms. Sweat coated his pale forehead and he was panting, hard.

 

“Hinata?” Kageyama called. “Hinata, wake up. Hinata!”

 

There were more people on the stage now, people crowding around the two of them and people speaking over the microphone saying that they were taking a break.

 

When they realized Hinata wasn’t waking up, they called an ambulance.

 

The show ended, everyone left. Kageyama insisted on riding in the ambulance with Hinata and when they got to the hospital, he finally woke up.

 

“What happened,” he asked, dazed.

 

“You passed out,” Kageyama said. “The doctor should be back soon. He took some blood and stuff.”

 

Just then, there was a knock on the door and the doctor entered.

 

“Hello, Hinata,” he greeted. “I’m glad you’re awake. I have a couple of questions for you, if that’s okay.”

 

The ginger nodded.

 

“How have your eating habits been?”

 

Hinata seemed to shrink. “Fine.”

 

“Really?” The doctor asked. “Because from your labs and your physical exam you seem to be malnourished.”

 

“I might have missed breakfast today,” Hinata replied. “And maybe lunch. But so what? It was a really busy day.”

 

Kageyama felt his chest tighten. He didn’t like where this was going.

 

“I’m convinced this has been going on for longer,” the doctor said. “If you won’t be honest with me then I can’t help you, and you’ll keep losing consciousness onstage.”

 

Hinata looked to Kageyama, then to the doctor, then back to Kageyama, then back to the doctor.

 

“I-I guess I could be eating more.”

 

“Have you been eating at all?”

 

“Not... Not really.”

 

Kageyama gaped at him. “Shouyou,” Kageyama winced at how he used Hinata’s given name. “How long has this been going on for? Has it been going on since things got bad?”

 

Hinata nodded. “Please don’t be mad at me, I just... I want to be someone they like again. I don’t know how to make them like me again.”

 

“Hinata, they don’t need to like you,” Kageyama said. “What they’re doing and saying is wrong and they have to know that. Look, why don’t we take a vacation? We can disappear, both of us, and when we come back maybe things will be better.”

 

The ginger’s bottom lip quivered. “We can’t just cancel the rest of the tour.”

 

“Like hell we can’t,” Kageyama exclaimed. “Look, the people who really care about us are going to understand. This is going to make the news and they’re going to know why we took a break in the middle of tour and when we come back, we’ll hit every city we missed- and then some. Sound good?”

 

“Yeah,” Hinata said, fighting a smile. “That sounds really good.”

 

“Good. We’ll get through it together.”

 

They left the hospital that day with a plan. Hinata would start trying to eat more and Kageyama would watch him closely, and as soon as they could they were going to Europe- just for a few weeks, just to get out of dodge. They needed this, especially considering the fact that Hinata couldn’t walk around town anymore without being sought after and ridiculed.

 

They didn’t know what exactly was coming next, but whatever it was-

 

They would be together.


	21. No Matter What Happens

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kagehina4Ever: “Hinata gets a injury/Illness that won’t let him play anymore and Kags is a supportive bf.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i see a lot of fics about career ending injuries, but what about career ending illnesses? idk i’m no expert on illnesses like this so don’t come @ me if my info is inaccurate, i blame google.

They were invincible.

 

With Kageyama by his side, Hinata could touch the sky. He could see over every wall that was in his way and jump over any obstacle. There was nothing they couldn’t overcome.

 

Until there was.

 

After their relationship had started and the volleyball season was under way, Kageyama noticed something. Hinata was frail. He’d always been skinny, Kageyama could distinctly remember noticing that when they met in middle school, but now he was just frail and weak. What made him even more worried was that the vomiting before matches had evolved into vomiting before tests, then vomiting before practice, then vomiting between classes.

 

At first, he’d always reassure Kageyama. “I’m fine,” he’d say. “I just get nervous sometimes. You know me!”

 

Then, he started getting worried, himself.

 

“I don’t know what’s wrong with me,” Hinata cried as he hunched over the toilet of the locker room, Kageyama lightly rubbing circles into his back. “I don’t know why I can’t stop. Am I dying?”

 

“No,” Kageyama said. “You’re not dying. Have you gone to the doctor?”

 

Hinata shook his head. “I haven’t told my mom how bad it is.”

 

“You mean you haven’t told her that you basically can’t keep any food down? Shouyou, at that rate you are going to die.”

 

“I know!” Hinata sat up. “I know. I just don’t want her to worry.”

 

Kageyama handed him toilet paper to wipe his mouth. “She should be worried. You need to tell her.”

 

Hinata sighed. “I know.”

 

The setter kissed the top of his head. “Let’s go to practice. You feel up to getting a few tosses in?”

 

Hinata nodded fervently.

 

The next day, Hinata wasn’t at school. Normally he’d text Kageyama at some point to tell him why, but today he wasn’t even answering his phone. Kageyama resulted to calling his mother, who answered rather quickly. He asked her what was wrong, why Hinata had disappeared.

 

She said he was in the hospital.

 

Kageyama asked question after question and then decided that he couldn’t take it any longer, that he had to go see his boyfriend. He called his mom and begged her to pick him up, and she did. She took him to the hospital and Kageyama raced up to Hinata’s room, leaving his mother walking several feet behind him. When he burst through the doors, he saw Hinata, pale and skinny as he was, lounging in the bed in the middle of the room.

 

“Hey, Tobio,” the ginger said. “Sorry I didn’t text you or answer the phone. I’ve been sleeping.”

 

Kageyama’s mom came in after him and got to talking with Hinata’s mom, who said she hadn’t eaten all day. Once Kageyama’s mother convinced her to let her buy them food, they left with a promise to be back soon.

 

“So you told your mom,” Kageyama asked.

 

“Not exactly,” Hinata said. “I... I was up all night throwing up. The entire night, I couldn’t stop. I couldn’t even keep water down. Eventually it hurt so bad that she took me to the emergency room this morning and they admitted me after I told them what was going on.”

 

“What are they going to do?”

 

“I don’t have a fever or anything,” Hinata pointed out. “Which is weird, so they want to do some tests to see how well my stomach works or something. I’m not really sure what it all means.”

 

“You’ll tell me what they say, right?”

 

“Of course.”

 

A few days came and went and Hinata underwent several tests until they found their answer: gastroparesis.

 

“What the hell does that mean,” Kageyama asked, looking to where Hinata was still sitting in his hospital bed.

 

“It’s when the muscles around my stomach aren’t working right, I think,” he replied. “I don’t know, but basically my stomach just doesn’t work.”

 

“What are they going to do about it?”

 

“They’re giving me a feeding tube this afternoon until-“

 

“What?”

 

“I’m getting a feeding tube. In my nose. Until they can figure out a way to make me be able to eat. It won’t be permanent.”

 

Kageyama leaned over onto the bed so he was halfway on it and hugged Hinata close.

 

“Good. You’ll get better.”

 

He did not, in fact, get better.

 

Hinata was told that he would have to start getting used to his new disability. The constant feeling of discomfort. The weakness and the lightheadedness. The nausea and vomiting whenever his stomach decided that it didn’t like something he ate. The struggle to stabilize his weight.

 

The fact that he had to give up volleyball.

 

They weren’t sure if it was for the rest of his life- maybe, if they somehow had a breakthrough in Hinata’s treatment, he would be able to start again, but for now he was benched. No, he was worse than benched. He could barely go to school, let alone practice.

 

Hinata was sent home, still with a feeding tube, and Kageyama went to his house every single day after school. He would lie on his bed and stare at the wall in silence and Kageyama would hold him, wiping away stray tears.

 

“I love you,” Kageyama would say.

 

“I love you too,” Hinata would whisper back.

 

“It’ll be okay,” Kageyama said on one particular day.

 

“No, it won’t.”

 

“It will,” Kageyama reiterated. “Because you’ll find a way to be able to eat again- to be able to live again. You might not be back to the way you were before, but you’ll live and you’ll be oka-“

 

“No, Kageyama,” Hinata cried. “I won’t be okay! I don’t think I can play volleyball ever again! I don’t want to live like this!”

 

“Shouyou,” Kageyama cooed, hugging him even tighter than before. “Shh, calm down. It’s oka- Uh, I’m here. I’m here.”

 

“You’re here,” Hinata said, not really a question, but more of a statement of what he knew was true.

 

“I’m here. I’ve got you. No matter what happens. Okay?”

 

“No matter what happens.”

 

Kageyama smiled into Hinata’s hair.

 

“No matter what happens.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> get ready for a new fic to be thrown @ ya. also i didn’t post yesterday bc i assume a lot of you were voting and i didn’t want to take your time or focus away from that ;)


	22. Taught a Lesson

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ScarletTheCat14: “what about karasuno is against a random school and between sets or something they hurt Hinata bc he's an "easy target" or smth and kageyama either walks in on it and/or finds out about it and becomes protective? I'm a sucker for Hinata whump and protective kags”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> read the end note for updates on future updates!! it’s important :)

“Ughhhh,” Hinata groaned, clutching his stomach.

 

“Seriously?” Kageyama asked. “Again?”

 

Hinata only nodded. If he opened his mouth, he feared he would throw up all over his teammate.

 

As soon as the bus stopped, Hinata ran to the bathroom. He sat in front of the toilet until he felt like he was okay, and then ran back to the court where his team was already practicing. As he practiced his spikes and his blocks, he couldn’t help but notice the other team staring at them- at him?- and whispering to each other. It only made him more nervous.

 

“Calm down,” Kageyama said. “This team is nobody. They’re practice, anyway, remember?”

 

“Yeah,” Hinata said. “You’re right.”

 

Kageyama seemed startled by how subdued he was, but Hinata couldn’t get their malicious whispers and dirty stares out of his head. No team had ever looked at them like that before. It gave him a bad feeling.

 

That bad feeling situated in his stomach and began pushing his breakfast upwards. He excused himself to the bathroom and ran there, emptying his stomach into the toilet. When he was done, he straightened up and went to wash his face, but the door opened and three boys from the other team walked in- they looked to be third years, from their size. Hinata started to sweat as he went towards the sink.

 

“You got some impressive spikes,” a boy with blond hair said. “They probably help you a lot in matches.”

 

A boy with glasses stepped up. “It would be a shame if you couldn’t help out your team.”

 

Another boy with a tattoo peeking out from his sleeve grunted.

 

Hinata took a step back, but Tattoo lunged at him. He cried out at the shock of the fist against his face and fell against the wall when a knee planted itself in his gut. He felt the air escape his lungs and tears flood his eyes, but the boys didn’t relent as he fell to the floor. They sent more kicks and punches his way and he screamed as loud as he could, but a foot found itself in his nose.

 

“Shut the fuck up,” Glasses said.

 

Hinata did.

 

It was a while until they were done beating on him and then just stood around him, admiring their work. Hinata wanted them to leave. He wanted to be left alone here, he wanted someone else, anyone else, to be here with him. He wanted-

 

The door opened.

 

“What the fuck?”

 

Hinata’s eyes landed on a pair of gym shoes. Not just any gym shoes- Kageyama’s gym shoes.

 

“Kag-Kag’yama,” the spiker whimpered.

 

“What the fuck are you doing,” Kageyama asked the boys.

 

“We found him like this,” Blond said, but the smirk on his face said otherwise. “Now that you’re here, I assume you can take care of him.”

 

The three boys left the room.

 

“Kag’yama?”

 

The setter snapped out of his daze and rushed forward to kneel in front of his teammate.

 

“Jesus, Hinata, did they do this?”

 

“Mm-hmm,” he cried.

 

“I’m-I’m gonna... Go get Suga. Yeah. I’ll be right ba-“

 

“No,” Hinata groaned, grabbing onto his hand. “Please.”

 

Kageyama looked defeated. “Okay. Can you get up?”

 

Hinata tried to sit himself up, but the pain in his ribs and chest and the white that flashed across his vision made him lay back down. Kageyama sighed and reached down to pick him up off the floor, Hinata groaning in pain as he did so. The redhead reached up and clutched Kageyama’s shirt, burying his face in his chest as he was carried back to their locker room.

 

“Shit, Kageyama, why did you beat up Hinata?!”

 

“What the hell happened?”

 

“I didn’t do it,” Kageyama said, pulling Hinata away from those who tried to investigate. “Those assholes from the other team did.”

 

There were shouts and exclamations and Suga’s face was the first thing Hinata saw when he was placed down on the bench.

 

“Hinata? How are you feeling?”

 

He just shook his head. Suga took someone’s towel and dampened it and pressed it against his forehead, probably where he was bleeding. He grabbed tissues and handed them to him to plug up his bloody nose with. Suga’s worried eyes were trained on his and Kageyama was pacing behind him, the rest of the team hanging around and staring.

 

“-Nata? Hinata.”

 

The redhead stared. “Huh?”

 

“He’s probably got a concussion,” Daichi said- when did he sit down next to him?

 

Suga was dabbing the towel at his face and cleaning up the blood as he spoke. “Has anyone gone to get Ukai or Takeda?”

 

There was shuffling and the room was suddenly emptier than it was before.

 

“Hinata, who did this to you?” Suga asked.

 

“It was those pricks from the other team,” Kageyama said. “I can point them out to you. I swear I’m going to bash their he-“

 

“Kageyama,” Daichi said. “Calm down.”

 

He seemed like he was going to say more, but everyone’s heads turned when Hinata inhaled sharply and leaned away from Suga’s touch when he pressed too hard on a painful area.

 

“Sorry,” he said.

 

Kageyama only looked more enraged. Hinata’s vision was blurry, but he could see the outline of a vein popping out in his setter’s forehead.

 

“I swear to God,” Kageyama said.

 

Then he left the room and they were all left staring at each other for a minute before Daichi frantically went after him. Hinata was sure that more people would’ve gone, but Ukai and Takeda came into the locker room followed by Ennoshita.

 

“Hey, kid,” Ukai said. “What happened?”

 

When no one was answering for him, Hinata opened his mouth.

 

“The-The... From the... They...”

 

It was all he could get out and Suga was right there when he found himself crying again.

 

It was decided for him that he needed to go to the hospital. Hinata stood and swayed, Suga practically carrying him out of the locker room.

 

“I’ll talk to their coach,” Ukai said. “This match is cancelled. Get your things and get back to the-“

 

There were shouts from down the hallway and whatever was happening, it didn’t sound good. Ukai ran ahead of them and when Hinata arrived on the scene, he saw Kageyama pinning down Blond while Daichi and Ukai were pulling him off. Glasses and Tattoo were standing in the background, obviously shocked, and when they finally got Kageyama to release the boy he turned around and Hinata saw that he had a split lip, bruising webbing out from around it.

 

That was how they got themselves in the front seat in the bus on the way to the hospital, Hinata leaning on Suga while listening to Kageyama get an earful from Ukai.

 

“Why did you do that?” Hinata heard Ukai ask. “Why the hell would you get yourself in trouble- and hurt, no less?”

 

“Because they hurt Hinata,” Kageyama said flatly. “They needed to learn their lesson.”

 

Hinata smiled where he sat.

 

That sure was his setter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay so i’m currently working on another fic so i’m going to release the rest of the requests i have written already and then i’m taking a break from requests for a while. i hope none of you mind! IF I HAVE ALREADY REPLIED SAYING I WILL DO YOUR PROMPT, THEN I WILL POST IT BEFORE I PUT THIS COLLECTION ON HIATUS SO PLEEEASE DONT WORRY!!! ily all thank you for reading and keeping me going


	23. Red Flags and Glass Slippers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> StrangelySurreal: “Hinata is neglected at home, his parents treat him more like a servant instead of a kid, they make him clean and stuff, he can only eat their leftovers, and he doesn’t even have his own room or bed he sleeps on a blanket in the closet. They also emotionally abuse him. Hinata doesn’t know this is abuse because it’s not physical. Karasuno freaks the fuck out when they find out what’s going on. This is heavily inspired by Cinderella in case you can’t tell :p”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello all i hope this is satisfactory

“Shouyou!”

 

Hinata’s eyes opened and he launched upward from his curled up position. He fumbled with the knob on his door and emerged from his closet.

 

“Yes, Mother?”

 

“You’re late!”

 

Hinata looked at the time on the clock opposite his closet.

 

Shit.

 

“I’m sorry!”

 

He rushed to get dressed into his uniform and as soon as he got into the kitchen, he got out food and materials to make breakfast. He made it as well as possible, giving up his speed because he’d much rather be a bit late for school than have to deal with what Mother and Father would say if their breakfast tasted badly.

 

“Shouyou, what the hell is taking so long,” his father asked. “You’re not the only one with a schedule here.”

 

Hinata just finished plating the food and placed it in front of his parents, praying they would eat quickly so he wouldn’t be as late.

 

Newsflash: they didn’t care if he was late. In fact, they would like him to be late, as punishment for waking up late.

 

Hinata bitterly left the house. Why had he forgotten to set his alarm the night before? What was he doing that caused him to forget? All that he remembered was getting home from practice and being dead beat tired already, and then having to finish a bunch of chores.

 

He’d missed practice completely, so he went straight to his first class, then his second. Finally, lunch came, so he could go talk to his friends.

 

“Where were you today,” Kageyama demanded.

 

“I overslept,” Hinata replied. “My parents weren’t happy.”

 

“Don’t do it again.”

 

Hinata scowled. “Okay, whatever.”

 

Kageyama seemed surprised at the lack of a retort, but Hinata was too tired to come up with a better response.

 

“Aren’t you going to eat?”

 

“Eat? Oh,” Hinata exclaimed. “I don’t have any food. There was none left for me.”

 

Kageyama raised an eyebrow. “None left for you? What, do you not have enough food at your house?”

 

“No! No, there’s enough food, I just always eat whatever’s left and let others take first. My mom taught me that it’s about being selfless or something.”

 

His stomach gave a loud growl.

 

“Here, take my rice,” Kageyama said.

 

Hinata beamed. “Thanks!”

 

That was Karasuno’s first red flag.

 

-

 

Practice was going rough that day. Hinata’s jumps were barely reaching their peak and he knew it. He was trying to do better, but he couldn’t get his sluggish body to move any faster.

 

Daichi called for a break and everyone jogged over to the side of the gym where everyone’s water bottles were scattered about.

 

“Hinata!” The redhead turned around and saw Nishinoya approaching him. “How are you feeling?”

 

“I’m doing okay!” He smiled as brightly as he could.

 

“You sure?” Noya raised an eyebrow. “You seem a bit... Slow.”

 

“I guess I didn’t really get much sleep last night,” he replied.

 

Nishinoya grinned. “Ah? Up late texting a special someone?”

 

Hinata shook his head. “No, no, just chores.”

 

“Really? I don’t know if I’m convinced. How many chores kept you up so late that you can barely keep your eyes open?”

 

“When I got home from practice I had to make dinner,” Hinata began. “Then I had to do the dishes, then I had to fold the laundry and put up another load, wait until that was washed and dried, fold that, clean the kitchen, make lunch for my sister for school-“

 

“Damn, okay,” Nishinoya said. “That’s a lot.”

 

“It just seems like a lot when I don’t manage my time correctly,” Hinata replied. “I’m used to it by now, but sometimes if I stay too late at practice, or if dinner takes too long, then I don’t get to bed until late.”

 

The whistle blew and it was time for them to get back on the court again.

 

That was the second red flag.

 

-

 

It was the day of a training camp and oh boy, was Hinata excited. It took days upon days to convince his parents to let him go, and the experience was emotionally exhausting. It was filled with insults and biting words and Hinata almost gave up, but then his father relented.

 

“Fine,” he said. “I guess getting a break from having to deal with your ass is a blessing.”

 

It wasn’t the exact response Hinata was going for, but it was good enough. His father signed the paper and he packed a bag with what few clothes he had and left the house with a smile on his face, trying not to let his father’s words ruin his day. Despite his efforts, when he arrived at the bus on that Friday evening, he couldn’t help the tears that sat in the corners of his eyes and threatened to spill over.

 

“Hinata,” Suga said when he saw the first tear spill. “What’s wrong?”

 

“Just something my dad said,” he replied. “It’s nothing, I don’t know why I’m getting so upset.”

 

“If you want to talk about it I’m here,” Suga said, a sad look on his face. “Is it okay if I ask what he said?”

 

“He, ah... He basically said he was looking forward to me being gone. It’s no big deal, though.”

 

Suga’s eyebrows got impossibly higher. “That’s... That’s horrible, I’m sorry.”

 

“It’s nothing, really,” Hinata said, wiping off his tears. “I’ve heard worse.”

 

He smiled and got on the bus and Suga stared at him worriedly.

 

That was red flag number three.

 

-

 

When they first got to the training camp, they chose their beds and put their stuff down next to them. The beds were simple cots that stood along the walls and Hinata excitedly grabbed the one next to Kageyama’s.

 

“Wow!” Hinata exclaimed as he threw himself onto the cot. “This thing is so cool!”

 

Kageyama scoffed. “No it’s not. It’s flimsy.”

 

“It’s soft, Kageyama. And it’s off the ground, too. It’s way better than what I have at home.”

 

People started to quiet down, listening to their conversation.

 

“The hell?” Kageyama questioned. “This thing is a piece of crap.”

 

“Hinata, what do you sleep on at home,” Suga asked.

 

“I just have blankets on the floor in a little room,” he said quietly. He began to worry. “Why? What do you guys have?”

 

“Beds,” Tanaka said, appalled. “Beds, Hinata.”

 

“I-I thought... I thought only adults and kids got those.”

 

“Hinata that’s not okay,” Suga said. He took a step forward and lowered his voice. “Is there anything else? Do they feed you?”

 

“I-I eat what’s left on their plates after meals,” he replied. “I don’t have time to sit because I have to do chores and homewo-“

 

“Hinata!”

 

“What the hell?”

 

“Someone go get coach.”

 

“Should we call the police?”

 

Hinata took a step back. What was going on? He didn’t mean to make everyone upset.

 

“It’s fine,” he said, voice quiet. “I’m- I’m not being abused or anything. They’ve never hurt me before.”

 

“Abuse isn’t just physical,” Daichi said. “It can be neglect or emotional or sexual.”

 

“I’m... I’m not...“ Hinata trailed off.

 

His team looked angry. Nishinoya had already gone to get Ukai and Takeda and everyone had stopped what they were doing to stare at Hinata and whisper amongst themselves.

 

“It’ll be okay, Hinata,” Suga said. “We’ll help you.”

 

Maybe he did need help.

 

Maybe they would help.

 

The red flags fell and he raised his white flag of surrender.

 

He needed help.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> requests still closed indefinitely


	24. See You Tomorrow: Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> SunRayNoWay, Kagehina4Ever, ShawwtyyChloe, and Shadow_Weaver requested a part two to “See You Tomorrow”.

Hinata’s eyes opened, once again. Another day.

 

He looked down at his wrists where white lines met his vision. It had been five weeks since he last tried to hurt himself. Five weeks and three days.

 

Once he was ready, he left for school and met Kageyama where their roads converged. The other had a granola bar in his hand, outstretched to meet Hinata before he even said “good morning.”

 

“Eat,” Kageyama said.

 

Hinata took the granola bar, his lips curving up slightly. “Thank you.”

 

They walked to school, Kageyama scanning the area for any sign of bullies or anything of the sort. Hinata kept his eyes trained on the ground, mostly out of habit.

 

When they got to the gym, Suga was the first to greet them.

 

“Hey, Shouyou,” he said. They’d gotten a lot closer recently and Hinata asked him to call him by his given name. “How are you feeling?”

 

“Good,” he said.

 

It wasn’t a complete lie. He was feeling good in certain ways. He’d been getting vetter sleep, eating better, not hurting himself or being hurt as much. Physically he was doing well. Mentally, on the other hand, he still wasn’t doing his best.

 

“That’s good,” Suga replied, a smile on his face. “Let’s get stretching.”

 

Practice came and went and Hinata got a few good spikes in, everyone being extra supportive when he missed. He appreciated it, even though it sometimes felt like he was being smothered. He was accompanied to his first class by Kageyama and his second class by Yamaguchi. He was never alone for any part of the day because that way those boys couldn’t hurt him again.

 

The school wasn’t doing much to protect him, and neither were Hinata’s parents. It was up to his friends to keep him alive.

 

After practice, he went over to Kageyama’s house. The setter warmed up leftovers from dinner that his parents left in the fridge for them and they sat in the dining room.

 

“You want to sleep over,” Kageyama asked.

 

“Sure.”

 

A number of his clothes were already at Kageyama’s house, so it wasn’t like he had to go back home- and it wasn’t like his parents even cared where he was.

 

They didn’t lay out a futon. Hinata grabbed an extra blanket and slept next to Kageyama on his bed. He didn’t enjoy sleeping alone, especially when he knew that someone was in the room with him but they were just out of reach. Any chance he got, he would sleep in the same bed as someone.

 

He got chances like that often. His friends had him sleep over almost every night. He was barely living in his own house anymore. He usually went with Kageyama, but other times he went with Suga or Nishinoya.

 

Noya had taken a different approach to things. At first he avoided Hinata altogether, then he spoke to him in a fit of sobs and yells.

 

“You almost killed yourself,” he screamed, tears streaming down his cheeks as they stood in the club room one day. “Why would you do that? Do you not care enough about us or something?”

 

“Yuu,” Hinata said. “It’s not like that.”

 

“Then what is it like?!”

 

Before he could say anything more, Suga forced him from the room. The next time they saw each other Nishinoya was much calmer, crying softly and hugging Hinata tightly. He apologized fervently.

 

“I thought we were going to lose you,” he said. “I thought... I thought I would never see you again, and then finding you with those pills...”

 

Hinata hushed him. “I’m sorry I did that,” he said. “I’m sorry I scared you.”

 

He supposed that it was something traumatic for Noya, walking in on him trying so determinedly to end his own life and having to literally tackle him to the ground in order to stop him. He felt guilty about it. So guilty, in fact, that he swore off self harm for a while. He went several days without even coming close before he broke down.

 

Though now it’s been a while since he’s hurt himself, Suga still insisted on checking his arms and his legs for cuts once a week. Today, walking the shorter distance from Kageyama’s house from the school, Hinata knew it was time for Suga’s weekly check. So when they dropped their stuff off in the club room, Hinata waited until everyone left except Suga.

 

“Ready,” the third year asked.

 

Hinata nodded. He rolled up his sleeves to reveal his wrists- which would otherwise have been revealed at practice, anyway. He inspected his arms and eventually Hinata changed his shirt so Suga could get a better look all the way up to his shoulder. He seemed to study every single scratch and scar on his arms, making sure nothing was new.

 

Next, Hinata began changing into his shorts.

 

“I don’t have to stay,” Suga always assured him.

 

“You can,” Hinata always replied.

 

When his pants were off, Hinata rolled his boxers up so Suga could get a view of his entire thigh, making sure that no scratches resided there. He never stared there long, though. Hinata figured it was because he didn’t want to make him uncomfortable.

 

“We can always skip this part if you don’t want to undress in front of me,” Suga said. “It’s fine. I just want to make sure you’re-“

 

“I understand, Suga,” Hinata replied. “Really, I get it.”

 

They finished and went to the gym, no one questioning why they were late because they all knew.

 

So this was how life went on. Just surviving. The team helping Hinata kick his legs to just stay above water until he learned to swim, himself. No one knew how long things would be like this for. No one knew if Hinata would ever get better like this, since his parents didn’t care. All they knew was that they had to keep getting up every morning because it was their duty to each other. So when Hinata said those words at the end of the day, it held a lot of meaning. It wasn’t just a phrase, it was a promise. A promise that he would survive.

 

“I’ll see you tomorrow.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i’m really stressed out. my mind feels like mush and i can’t concentrate on anything. all i want to do is get high and sleep and that’s it. idk what to do because people need me to be okay but i’m not. i’m so run down physically i’m tired all the time. i can barely make it through the day anymore. i don’t know what to do honestly.   
> regardless,  
> i’ll see you tomorrow.


	25. What Keeps You Grounded?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ShawwtyyChloe: “Kageyama is being abused at home or something like that, and one day breaks down (crying/screaming) in front of the team at practice”

Kageyama’s feet hit the floor.

 

His lungs burned as he looked around him, his team moving in sync. It was just another three on three. Why did he feel so anxious?

 

He looked at the band aids around his fingers. The cuts were from picking up the glass bottles that had shattered after they hit the wall. Their original target was his head, but he’d gotten good at ducking since a lot of flying objects were aimed for his head. Fists, bottles, any object his dad could get his hands on.

 

It was a regular occurrence. That mixed with the beatings and the screaming and the constant drunkenness, Kageyama hated his home. His mother was never there. She only came back some nights, and that was only to get money or clothes or do laundry before she packed another bag and left all over again. She didn’t care that she was leaving her son alone with the very monster she was escaping.

 

Kageyama’s feet hit the floor.

 

It sent a wave of shock up his body because he landed on his heels instead of his toes this time. He should really pay better attention to what he’s doing. If not it could cost him the match. Then again, it wasn’t like it was a real match anyways- but everyone looked so into it. If he wanted to hold up his facade, he needed to seem as immersed as he usually was.

 

Kageyama’s eyes fell down to his legs where bruises littered his shins and knees. He passed those as well as the matching ones on his arms off as ones he received while playing, but most of them were from his father. The beatings were daily, and he was good at covering his face and resisting blows that were too obvious. He could take the occasional broken finger or rib as long as it meant he didn’t have bruises on his face or neck.

 

That didn’t mean he ever fought back. It just meant that he dodged as much as he could until he was able to retreat to his room and lock the door for the night.

 

Kageyama’s feet hit the floor.

 

If you were to walk through the Kageyama household, you would be hit with the pungent smell of tobacco and liquor. Holes littered the walls and glass that Kageyama would inevitably miss whenever he would clean resided on the floor.

 

It wasn’t a home. It was barely even a house to Kageyama. It was a prison, his personal hell. A nightmare that he entered whenever he woke up.

 

Kageyama’s feet hit the floor.

 

He would give anything to escape. Especially after last night, when the beating got especially vicious and the words even more so. Kageyama didn’t want to go home and get a glimpse of the deep purple on his abdomen. He didn’t want to go home and hear the name calling.

 

Kageyama’s feet hit the floor.

 

He didn’t want to go home at all. He would give anything to not go back.

 

Kageyama’s feet hit the floor.

 

He didn’t know how much more of this he could take.

 

Kageyama’s feet hit the floor.

 

His body, his mind, all of it was breaking.

 

Kageyama’s feet hit the floor.

 

Kageyama’s feet hit the floor.

 

Kageyama’s feet...

 

...

 

Kageyama’s feet never left the floor.

 

The ball rolled off the court and he stood, wide eyed, staring at his shoes. Staring at his bandaged fingers dangling at his sides and his bruised legs barely holding him up.

 

“Kageyama!” Hinata was shouting. “What the hell was that? You just lost us the-“

 

“Shut the fuck up!” Kageyama’s voice was hoarse. “Who cares about the fucking game, Hinata? Just shut the fuck up!”

 

“Kageyama,” Daichi said, coming towards him. “Do you need to take a-“

 

“No,” he said. “There are no breaks, there are no- no- no alternatives, there’s just- it’s all- God! I can’t take this shit anymore!”

 

“Do you need to go home,” Daichi offered.

 

“Fuck! No!” Kageyama was screaming before he could get a handle on himself and dammit, he couldn’t breathe. “I’d rather die than go home. Don’t make me go home.”

 

Hinata had taken several steps back. “Kageyama...”

 

“Don’t look at me like that,” Kageyama said. He could feel his eyes well with tears. “I can’t... I can’t do this anymore, I just...” He covered his face. “Please help me, I don’t want to do this anymore. I don’t want

 

Kageyama’s knees hit the floor. He was kneeling and he could feel people’s hands on him, voices hushing him as he cried and he hated it. He hated that they sounded so scared and worried because of him. He hated that they were upset and it was his fault, because he should never have opened his mouth.

 

“Kageyama.” He looked up and Ukai was standing over him. “Can I talk to you?”

 

He nodded and stood shakily, Ukai placing a hand on his shoulder and guiding him outside. The man studied his face for a moment.

 

“Is everything okay at home?”

 

Kageyama only laughed. When Ukai didn’t speak further, he shook his head.

 

“The bruises all over your legs, they’re not just from practicing, are they?”

 

He shook his head again.

 

“I’m going to call Child Protective Services, okay?”

 

Kageyama felt new tears spring to his eyes. He nodded.

 

“Want me to get Hinata to come wait with you?”

 

Another nod.

 

When Ukai disappeared and the redhead emerged, they didn’t make eye contact. Neither of them spoke as they sat next to each other on the step outside the gym. Hinata placed his hand on Kageyama’s. When he didn’t move, he scooted closer and wrapped his whole arm around him.

 

“Wanna... Wanna give me a toss after this?”

 

“Yeah.”

 

Thank God for his spiker.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i’m taking an indefinite break from prompts/requests! i will be posting the first chapter to a new fic directly after this. i just really want to try and focus on that for now. i hope you understand!

**Author's Note:**

> check the description to see if requests are open! if so, comment your prompts! :)


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